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Living with Bipolar? Come join to chat ups, downs, and everything in between

76 replies

UppityDownitty · 05/10/2021 08:50

Hi. I rarely see any threads on the MH board here from those of use with Bipolar diagnoses. I find it tends to be largely threads on anxiety, situational depression & stress, which I have also had battles with, but which don’t really cover the particular challenges and experiences unique to bipolar disorder.

I wondered if any fellow bipolar-bears would like to share a space here with me to chat about stuff, share wisdom & support, or to just waffle on generally (like I’m apt to do sometimes!).

Maybe if anyone’s interested in joining the thread we could introduce ourselves a bit? I’m happy to start the ball rolling…

I’m a single mum of 2 youngish ones. Lots of recent traumas/major life stresses over past 3yrs. Ended up having manic eps and my previous diagnosis (for 20yrs) was changed to bipolar affective disorder (type 1). Ive resisted any mood stabilisers until now (only lamotrigine, which hasn’t been effective) and was relying on PRN diaz to try to ward off hypomanic eps. However, mood has been all over place lately & seems to be ultra-rapid-cycling now so this week I’ve accepted I need lithium. Just been for blood tests & hoping to start shortly. Nervous about it though, and still question whether I do really have a mood disorder or whether I’m just a bit (lot?) traumatised by an awful few years/set of circumstances.

Anyone else want to join me?

OP posts:
DonnieDark · 05/10/2021 13:29

Hi OP, thanks for this thread. I'm supporting my partner who has bipolar. He's 41 next week and has been very up and down lately, he uses cocaine when high and generally doesn't take his CPN's advice so things are very difficult for me. As his birthday is coming up he's just told me he plans on 'going on a mad one' and that it's men only so now I'm worried he's going to go straight back to being high after just coming down from one. I realise I can't reason with him, but my god it's tough. I've just come out of rehab myself so even worse when he's drinking and doing drugs around me, but I'd rather be here to make sure he's safe. Here we go again I guess.

DigOlBick · 05/10/2021 13:39

Hi! I’m 27 and pregnant with baby number 2. Have had a very up and down pregnancy due to not being on any meds but am getting to the end now and eager to get back on my meds!

BippityBoppity87 · 05/10/2021 14:15

Hi everyone, I'm 34 and and have a 5 year old DS. Live in Edinburgh

I was diagnosed with bipolar December/January 2019

For years I used to think I had SAD, so thought I could manage my moods myself. Became really unwell after my DS was born with postnatal depression. Declined further and after 9 months I was still very depressed. Ended up with home treatment who put me on an antidepressant, sent me manic. Given an antipsychotic to bring me back down again, but went too down after the mania (which lasted about 3 months) diagnosed with bipolar

Was on lamotrigine and aripiprazole, which I didn't like and was still very, very depressed to the point I was hospitalised for two weeks. Came out, decided to come off aripiprazole myself (which I now know was stupid) manic again within the week. Put on Risperidone to bring me back down. Was kind of ok for a little while, but felt like all my emotions had been taken away and still didn't feel quite right

Was put on lithium and it felt like a vail had lifted. Asked to come off my other meds, which again, I was ok for a little bit as well. Even though lithium is a great med, I realised it wasn't enough as a stand alone to keep me stable. Was given quetiapine in addition to help with sleep and anxiety. Then Sertraline was added again at a low dose, which has worked well with a mood stabiliser

Ended up with psychosis last March, couple of weeks into the the first lockdown as I had quite bad tonsillitis. Was given prednisone, which they, nor me, knew it can make bipolar worse Hmm So that was fun...

I was also quite hypomanic just before Christmas then slumped again March time, but thankfully hasn't been as bad as previous episodes. Been pretty stable since April

I also have ADHD, and was diagnosed last November. I take Xaggitin xl for that

Nice to meet you all Smile

Pinkandpurplehairedlady · 05/10/2021 14:54

Hi,

I was diagnosed with bipolar two years ago (I also had EUPD) and am on ariprazole, duloxetine and lamotragine. I don’t feel very stable though as I have hyper manic periods followed by depression. I have an appointment with the AMHT tomorrow so am going to ask about lithium. I’m slightly nervous of all the blood tests but it’s great to hear it’s helped other people.

Justbecauseofit · 05/10/2021 15:01

Hello Smile

I was diagnosed almost ten years ago but struggled for ten years before that before an accurate diagnosis was made.

I've gone through my battles and now I am medication free. I am heading in to a depression after some stops and starts this year though so I know I'm in for a long winter.

Nice to meet you all!

DonnieDark · 05/10/2021 16:32

I should mention that I also have BPD, ASD and ADHD, but I'm relatively stable on meds now so easier to cope with my partner's mania.

Is anyone else prone to making bad decisions whilst manic, and how do your partners/ family cope and support you?

LifesABotch · 05/10/2021 20:40

Hello, I'd like to join too, and have also found a lack of threads for people who have long-term/lifelong mental illness, rather than situational depression or anxiety (not to downplay those, it is just quite different to living with a condition that perhaps has more severe and far-reaching effects.)
I am being assessed for bipolar, and don't have much support, but am anxious about posting too much online. (Posted on another thread, but chickened out and asked to have post removed!)
Very interested to read everyone's posts so far, and can relate to lots of it. Wishing you all well! Thanks

Pinkandpurplehairedlady · 06/10/2021 19:05

So had my review with the psychiatrist today and they’ve agreed that Lithium is a good option for me. They’ve sent me the purple booklet via email and will schedule another teams meeting early next week once I’ve had chance to read it. Once we’ve had the review I can pick up the forms for my bloods and get started.

I’m a bit daunted by it all as somehow lithium seems more hardcore than the other meds I’m taking but I’m also looking forward to being more stable.

UppityDownitty · 07/10/2021 12:07

@Pinkandpurplehairedlady - that’s good to hear you’ve had the appt and decided how to proceed.
We’re literally in identical situations. I finally decided on Monday to go with Lithium, they got me in for blood test that day, awaiting blood results then prescription.
No one has mentioned a purple booklet whatsoever. My CMHT is in another area (I’m an out of area patient due to professional reasons) so there’s always a bit of a ball-ache getting comms between CMHT & GP, and me having to drive to other city to collect my prescriptions for things.

They were really pleased I’d decided on Li, agreed to act fast (before I change my mind again - ha!) and said it’ll be a call any day now with blood results then a prescription. In a way I’m glad, as I think I’ll change my mind again if there’s a delay (like you I’ve been scared to think about Li as seems too hard-core and disproportionate to what I believe I have, although Pdoc seems to think I have an extreme bipolar mood disorder).

Anyhow, you and I have both taken the plunge with getting the ball rolling this week, and I’m proud of us.

Keep me posted on your progress with it, and we can be lithium-newbie-buddies if you’d like??

OP posts:
BippityBoppity87 · 07/10/2021 12:32

I've never seen lithium as hardcore. I assumed it was the gold standard of bipolar meds, so when it was suggested for me, I had no hesitations. I can see how blood tests can be a bit daunting, but I actually like that and tbh, should be the case with all meds. I like that my kidneys, liver, thyroid etc are closely monitored

Also, I was told I had bipolar type 2 and it's worked brilliantly, so I don't think it's necessarily for those who have it "severely" per se. Unless I actually have bipolar type 1, who knows

BippityBoppity87 · 07/10/2021 13:25

@DonnieDark

I should mention that I also have BPD, ASD and ADHD, but I'm relatively stable on meds now so easier to cope with my partner's mania.

Is anyone else prone to making bad decisions whilst manic, and how do your partners/ family cope and support you?

Yes very. The worst has to be when I decided to leave my partner (when manic) flew to London, got a hotel and a bottle of gin and asking all and sundry on tinder to come to my hotel room. Thankfully no one did. Cannot believe I did that, it was pretty bad, let alone bloody dangerous. Don't know what I was thinking. Not like me at all. And I certainly wouldn't do that when I'm stable!

My partner, thankfully, stood by me and knew it was the illness. I was so horrible to him. Anyone else I think would have left me, so I'm thankful I have such a supportive partner. I agreed to see my psych again urgently when I came back who put me straight back on an antipsychotic

So I think, you have to be accountable as well, and take your meds. No excuses. It's not fair on others around you

sospspsp · 07/10/2021 15:16

So interesting reading this thread.
My sister has Type 2 bipolar, she won't take any meds (she hates feeling 'numb').
She doesn't seem to have any highs - just crippling depression.
she's a single mum and it's so hard to watch her not really engaging with her children. They are so lovely and luckily my Dm is around to help, but I wish my ds would/could try other meds/treatments. She's not really here half the time Sad

UppityDownitty · 07/10/2021 21:41

Like @BippityBoppity87 I did something similar in my first major manic ep about 10 months ago. I became hyper-sexual, signed up to a porn site (I’d previously never in my life viewed porn), got very into S&M porn, posted explicit photos of myself & ended up engaging online 1:1 with many, many sadists who I then started talking to off the site, arranging very dangerous meet-ups where I was going to allow myself to be willingly subjected to all manner of destructive, dangerous acts.

I had zero guilt about this (couldn’t see why on earth my partner should have a problem with it). This again is at TOTAL odds with my usual personality (I feel guilty at the drop of a hat, for everything). I eventually texted my partner with a breezy message notifying him I wouldn’t be around at the weekend as was planning on having a lot of very extreme S&M sex with some strangers. His response was horrified, but I fired back that he was a square party-pooper, and got very cross with him that he was raining on my parade & being “possessive”. This all played out in a branch of Boots, where I was firing off texts, laughing and crying, and trying to seduce all the random blokes buying Meal Deals.

I bounced home in a mixed dysphoric state, laid on my bed, laughed uncontrollably whilst crying and rambling on phone to all and sundry. I was sending nonsense texts to my friends (who didn’t know I’d started with a mood disorder), told my oldest friend her husbands cancer could be cured by listening to Elton John, and then descended into a black hole.

So. Yes. None of that was my finest hour. And was so recent and so totally out of the blue.

Since then, I’ve had bursts of milder stuff (hypomania) which is either euphoria, or mixed dysphoric. Usually starts with a slow build of confidence/well-being, or over activity, then a laser sharp brain, then pressured speech, flight of ideas, counterproductive simultaneous tasks, then descends into total confusion, laughing, crying, sobbing and then a crash.

Happening on an almost weekly basis now… it’s exhausting. Hence finally accepting I probably do have bipolar. My theory around a differential diagnosis is emotional disregulation due to several recent severe traumas. That’s why I was loathe to medicate longer-term with Lithium, as I was convinced I could “manage” with some lamotrigine for the lows (20yr Hx of recurrent major depression) and the odd bit of PRN diazepam for the highs. I thought it’d all settle down once the most recent traumas were more settled, but I’ve plugged away like that for almost a year & can’t go on anymore with the increasing ultra-rapid cycling (whatever the root cause is).

I just assumed I’d not benefit from Li if it was more of a reactive trauma response rather than ‘proper’ bipolar disorder.

OP posts:
DonnieDark · 08/10/2021 11:58

Anyone on depakote or taken it before?

DonnieDark · 08/10/2021 13:16

My partner has done very similar to your stories - it's taken time but I've learned to let it go now, glad you have supportive partners 😊

UppityDownitty · 08/10/2021 13:44

@DonnieDark - it must be so hard as his partner. I’m perpetually gobsmacked at how much mine puts up with, especially as we’ve only been together a couple of years and don’t live together. It must be difficult for you; and it’s a lot to live with.
No, I’ve never tried depakote… I’ve not really come across it for bipolar but I’m fairly new to this whole game so I’m sure someone will be along with some experience of it.

OP posts:
BippityBoppity87 · 08/10/2021 15:02

I was given the choice of either lithium or depakote and settled with lithium, as I heard that depakote can cause weight gain, which put me off, but I could be wrong

UppityDownitty · 08/10/2021 18:50

That’s been a worry of mine too, @BippityBoppity87 - the prospect of weight gain. Am I right in thinking Lithium is fairly weight neutral? My pdoc says it is, but I’d be interested to hear your experience on that front. Would you say it’s been weight neutral for you?

OP posts:
BippityBoppity87 · 08/10/2021 19:08

@UppityDownitty Yes I would say it is. I've managed to lose about 3 stone since I've been on it, in conjunction with diet and exercise

BippityBoppity87 · 08/10/2021 19:10

You need to drink plenty water on it though as it's essentially a salt. So any weight gain I'd imagine would be mainly water weight if you're not drinking enough

UppityDownitty · 08/10/2021 22:15

Thanks @BippityBoppity87 . Well done on your amazing weight loss- that’s incredible. I’m hoping I can get back on track with my food & fitness once life levels out.
Curiously, this week since deciding that I’ll start on lithium I’ve felt so much more stable (even though I’ve not got the prescription yet).

Do you feel more thirsty on the lithium? Or do you just need to remember to drink more? I’m appalling at remembering to drink fluids, even when I’m dehydrated. I’ll perhaps set alarm reminders to prompt me!

OP posts:
BippityBoppity87 · 09/10/2021 12:24

A bit of both. I bought a big refillable bottle and just make sure I have it with me during the day. I do need to take water with me to bed though as I sometimes wake up quite thirsty, but not all the time

DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 16:30

@UppityDownitty thank you, it is tough admittedly but he's had to put up with me too! I think the hardest part is the cocaine and drinking - I worry about his health mainly. He's used prostitutes in the past and although that makes me question how he views women I know he's not done that for ages and he doesn't seem as hypersexual in this mania.

I've learned not to criticise his drug use because he gets angry. That's amazingly the only time we've argued in almost a year.

I take some responsibility for the extent of the previous episode because I was also using at the time and we spent the entire time getting high together, which made everything far worse.

Sometimes I wish I could take bipolar away from him but he says he could save himself but just doesn't want to yet. I do get how the mania must be exciting though.

BippityBoppity87 · 09/10/2021 16:38

The thing about hypo/mania. It kind of is, until it isn't iykwim. At first you just feel like you're in a really good mood, but it can turn pretty quickly. It got so bad at one point a couple of weeks before I was admitted, I was standing on the outside of my window ledge of my 3rd floor flat thinking aliens were contacting me telepathically and another time electricity running through my body (not sure if anyone else has had that) I thought I was going to have a heart attack

Is your DP under the care of a cmht @DonnieDark? Thankfully I've never really used drugs during episodes, just alcohol. Which isn't great either

DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 18:30

@BippityBoppity87 yes he's also got a CPN who visits once a week and he can text them anytime, plus the crisis team will cover any days I'm not there when he's really unwell.

He's only had one really psychotic bit but mostly his manias turn him into a god and he would rather stay there forever when he's there.

Depakote is actually used to treat cocaine addiction oddly enough so maybe he takes more because the effect is less...