In 30 days only as I don't want to be reminded of this down the line or have it stick around
I have never felt like this. I'm nearing end of pregnancy with first very much wanted baby.
I have been diagnosed with Cholestasis and Pre -eclampsia, both of which carry higher risk of complications and still birth.
I'm doing everything I can for my baby and attending all monitoring appts and check ups but my mental health is falling apart
I'm convinced I won't get to bring home a living baby and that the best thing to do after that is to kill myself. I'm so scared because I've never had trouble with mental
Health previously or felt like this.
When I'm having these thoughts I don't feel frantic or panicky just really calm, like it's just the next logical step to take.
I'm trying not to think like this but I dream it every night and it creeps in during the day too.
I'm not really sure who to talk to, my partner has been amazing but is so worried about me and baby anyway and working hard to save up money before paternity leave. I don't want to burden him.
The health visitor asked if I ever felt down or depressed but I didn't feel able to answer when asked so bluntly and in front of DH
I just don't know what to do anymore 