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Faced my dental phobia yesterday

56 replies

conxray · 10/08/2021 22:19

Name changed for this.
I'm so proud of myself but I have absolutely no one I can tell.
I have a severe dental phobia and hadn't been to the dentist for 30 years until yesterday. I've never told anyone about the phobia. I started refusing to go when I was 14. I don't think my parents realized how bad it was.

Anyway, it has taken me forever to get up the courage to go. I am so fucking proud of myself. I have spent a year trying to find a dentist I could even face going to. Most wouldn't even email back. I couldn't phone as that was just too much. Every time I looked at a website or wrote an email I started feeling faint and sick. I'd cry after the email was sent. Most of the fuckers never wrote back.
Eventually one did.... I'm in Europe and she is 4 hours away in another country... but the way she wrote back made me think I could do it.

It took another couple of months with a bit of emailing to get the courage to make an appointment.
I went yesterday. Had to stay overnight in a hotel where I cried and panicked all night. I still made it into the practice yesterday, started crying and hyperventilating immediately
BUT when the dentist came out to get me something about her calmed me down. We'd agreed just to have a tour of the practice and a chat about my worries and how the phobia arose but within an hour she'd managed to do an X-ray and I'd sat in the chair, then lay down in it and let her look in my mouth.
I cannot believe it. I'm just so proud of myself for doing it but can tell no one as I will then have to "own up" to the dental phobia.

She said my teeth are in good condition and that I have looked after them very well. I was fearing a situation where half of them would have to be pulled.
She said I have superficial caries in some teeth. There's a wisdom teeth situation going on - they might need to come out but they can only come out in a hospital because of the way they are sitting on nerves. Fucking hell.

I feel so much better. I'm not panicking about the fillings. I might do when we get that far but the next step is that I go back in a couple of weeks for her to do a scale and polish. She wants to take everything in little steps so I feel comfortable. She said if the scale and polish is too much in one go she will do just the upper teeth and then I can have a lunch break and decide if I want to do the lower ones too or not.
I honestly think it's going to be ok and I can do this step.

I've tortured myself for 30 years and thought I'd never find a solution. I've done the first step and I can do the next. Then we'll see about the fillings.... but as I've also had a needle phobia and managed to get the COVID vaccine, maybe I can do a filling too.

Thank you to anyone who listened to this. I sort of want to celebrate getting this far!

OP posts:
PixiePirate · 01/07/2022 16:53

So sorry - just read the full thread and caught up! 🤦🏽‍♀️ Still a fantastic achievement though x

SLHypnotherapy · 02/07/2022 16:46

Love this OP! Well done. I see a lot of people with phobias and dentophobia is a big one! Keep hold of that positivity!!

conxray · 28/03/2023 21:35

I thought I would update my thread again. My dentist moved to another practice, further away, but I have moved with her. Didn't feel ready to change dentist yet. I went to the new practice and I was a bit wobbly at first as it was quite stressful for me in a new waiting room and having to fill in forms again
but the appointment itself was fine - I had a check up, a scale and polish and needed one filling (actually it was one that she told me the last time might need doing).
I rocked all of it!!
I'm just updating because a lot of people were very kind on here and also I know that people do search for dental phobia on Mumsnet as I've had a few private messages with the same problem and have been able to help some people.

Basically, I have been really really good at going for my 6 month check ups (she said I only need to go once a year, but I said I would go more often - unbelievable!! - to make sure it became really routine).
I felt so unbelievably proud of myself this time in the new practice, with a new dental assistant and new surroundings.

OP posts:
ClumpingBambooIsALie · 28/03/2023 21:45

I'm really pleased for you — you're right that a new environment can feel like it's destabilising the familiarity you've worked so hard to build up, but it sounds like you took this hurdle totally in your stride, and demonstrated to yourself that you can deal with changes and challenges as they arise. It sounds like you're doing really great and I'm guessing your teeth feel happy too 👍

SugarSyrup · 29/03/2023 17:31

Thanks for the update, I have followed this thread since the start! My dental phobia is horrific and your updates give me hope. I just about manage 6 monthly check ups and thank my lucky stars every time I haven't needed any work, although I have a painful sensitive tooth now so I know work is ahead of me.

Well done you. Reward yourself!

conxray · 29/03/2023 20:10

SugarSyrup · 29/03/2023 17:31

Thanks for the update, I have followed this thread since the start! My dental phobia is horrific and your updates give me hope. I just about manage 6 monthly check ups and thank my lucky stars every time I haven't needed any work, although I have a painful sensitive tooth now so I know work is ahead of me.

Well done you. Reward yourself!

Thanks! It's funny now - I couldn't give a flying fuck about it. As soon as I saw my dentist everything was fine - it was just the new reception area which freaked me a bit. When she said she wanted to do a filling I just said fine and she got on with it!
I do really like the fact that I have a check up and if anything needs to be done, she does it straight away which removes any chance of getting anxious about waiting for an appointment for treatment.
She also books me in for longer appointments than for a normal check up so there's no stress and she can take her time with me. I'm not paying extra for this either - it's a private dental practice in Hungary.

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