Fluoxetine/antidepressants

[Cloudd]

Hi. Need your advice/positive experiences...
Couple weeks ago I was diagnosed with severe depression and generalised anxiety disorder so started fluoxetine/Prozac for first time. It’s been 3weeks now, a did a week on 10mg and then to 20mg. I’ve seen an improvement in my mood and energy, from a 0 to a 4, but will this continue to improve over the following weeks or is this the best it’s going to get? I still feel down during the evenings, when did it start to work for you/noticeable improvements? Xx

Welcome @FiloFaxx it’s good you reached out for help and starting the meds’ has helped me, I started in January and for the first 2 weeks I had nausea and hardly any appetite. I’m on 20mg but recently asked for an increase due to intrusive thoughts. I’m giving myself time to see if I will need to start it as don’t want to increase if I’m not too bad.
It’s hard going through this without a baby so with a baby and family that’s a lot, please be kind to yourself. Our emotions/hormones can affect us in so many ways we need time and support to get through this. Did you say if you had emotional support?

Evening all, Some days I feel ok and other days like today...I think what’s the point in anything ? I think my period is coming which is making me feel achy and negative also I’m stressing myself about work and slept really badly so woke up tired.
Tomorrow will be a better day I hope.
Sunday morning I did a unplanned work out and felt so good and then I had a slump...I know going forward I need to try and exercise regular to help my mood. I did a quick workout before I started work today,

@maidenpink did you go for your swim yesterday? I’m not reading anything good...I can’t seem to concentrate on much these days. I hear you about being careful about what you read and watch ...unfortunately sometimes I have no choice in certain areas of my life and this can at times trigger negative thoughts but other times I am able to distance myself politely.

Sorry you’re not feeling good...these feelings can be so draining. It’s good you didn’t have a meltdown. It’s good you are recognising when you getting drawn into what if and trying to deal with it with Whatever. I’m taking tips.
I feel lonely at times but other times I’m lucky I can hide away and not need to have energy to even have a conversation.

@polelynn that’s a relief about the job situation with your daughter.

It’s good you could watch the video that is progress and we need to remember that I think it may have been mentioned before that it can be a marathon and not a sprint regarding the road to recovery.

I’m pleased your second therapy session went well, that felt like it came around quickly. I hope the sessions continue to go well and provide the support you need.

Thinking of you all X

@sugarlost thank you for your warm welcome. So glad to hear the meds have been helping. Sorry to hear about the intrusive thoughts. Giving yourself some time sounds sensible.

Yes I've got a husband and close family but as much as I feel like I talk to them about things I don't think they really "get" it. The lack of sleep has brought it all to a head but I've felt anxious for years and just got on with it/covered how intense it can get. It's not going to be a case of getting sleep will stop me feeling this way. Although the sleep would help me a bit in general!

@FiloFaxx I do sometimes write stuff down but I have to be careful even with that because a lot of my thoughts are just junk and giving them attention can make them worse. I have some strange, repetitive anxieties and the best thing for those is to recognise they are just noise and focus on something else. Easier said than done mind you. Re anxiety, I don't think people can understand how all encompassing it is unless they've been there. When I'm well I can even forget what it's like. It makes me feel like I'm going to go mad, whatever that even means. My thoughts just go so fast and hop about different things, from the reasonable to the completely absurd. I know it's just what happens to our brains when there's too much adrenaline and cortisol whooshing around from being in fight/flight but knowing that doesn't make it go away or much easier at times.

@sugarlost I did go for a swim and it was good but like you and your workout I had a slump after it. Nothing magically makes it all go away. Well done on your pre-work workout too! I know what you mean about some days feeling like what's the point. I felt a bit despairing earlier because getting well is taking me so long. But a good reminder from you that recovery is a marathon not a sprint.

Hope tomorrow is a better one. X

Gosh I hear you about the seemingly impossibleness about this whole thing and wondering what is the actual point. Remember we are so strong though to be battling these thoughts every day but still functioning. If we think about it we are still managing to do a lot so we should recognise that. Sometimes I wonder to properly commit to my recovery I'd be better off being somewhere where I can totally focus on it, rather than being pulled in a million other directions day in day out and is so frustrating and a lonely place to be when those around you don't get it, don't realise the strength of our feelings and what we are coping (or not) with under the surface. I think I'll be ever changed by all this and in a good way too. Hugs to you all. ❤️

@polelynn I think going away to concentrate on recovery could be a double-edged sword ... maybe it's better to recover in your normal environment because ultimately you have to make it work there, even if it makes the process a bit slower and more challenging at times. I don't know. Yes, it does take a huge amount of strength to be doing what we're doing and it can be lonely. Places like this are so valuable where people are going through similar so we know we're not alone. Xxx

Good afternoon

@Maidenpink that makes sense about drawing attention to certain things. For me I'm trying to carve out time in the day when I'm allowed to think about it then try and move away.

@polelynn I too sometimes wish I could go away to reflect on things. First I want a full night sleep away from everyone and everything then time to think.

After my call with the gp she recommended a counselling service so I'm on their waiting list. Then my health visitor said she was surprised my gp did that because they have a practice counsellor so she's passed my details onto them as well 🤦🏻‍♀️ haven't even started yet and I'm already anxious that it's overwhelming.

Aw @FiloFaxx I totally get that. I can get into a state even speaking to the GP at the moment. Counselling is daunting and it's natural to feel anxious about talking about your difficulties with someone new. I've had a fair bit over the years and I'm always nervous. It will be okay, recovery wouldn't be work if it was easy. X

@FiloFaxx Like @Maidenpink I can totally understand your anxiety over dealing with your GP. I've had to steel myself to deal with mine before and my anxiety always increases over any communication. I think it's because they are a gatekeeper to services and medication and it's that feeling that what if they say no or are unsupportive. I've got to say I've found mine helpful, knowledgeable and reassuring that recovery is possible throughout this so far.

In terms of getting a good nights sleep, can your DH support you to get this one night, maybe over the extended BH weekend if he's at work?

@Maidenpink you are right of course about recovery. This needs beating in conjunction with everything life throws at us not in isolation from it. Hope you're having a good day. I'm oddly calmer today, a couple of triggers I've been able to respond to with ease and shrug off. I almost feel a kind of acceptance with the whole situation.

@polelynn glad you've had a calmer day and the triggers were easier to dismiss. Today's been a little better for me too, met up with a group of people outdoors, not all of them I knew, was very anxious going but pleased I did it. Was actually good talking to others about the experience of lockdown, made me feel less alone with my struggles. Feels like a way to process some of it. X

Hi all,
@FiloFaxx it's good to hear you have support but I hear you about them not really understanding how you feel. No one in real life knows about my struggles and I appreciate having this online support to express how I'm feeling.
I'm also struggled for years without support and I think I had a breakdown in the past it got so bad.. which I think was brought on by bullying and a pressurised job.
Great news about the therapy support, I hope your anxiety decreases. Have faith and I hope you can rest... it's also an important contribution to a healthy mind . I'm not doing well sleeping either.

@Maidenpink I'm glad your swim was good. I didn't do a workout today. I may do some beginners yoga later.
We have to try and remember the good experiences we have and to keep planning healthy things as that feeling can feel so energising and positive and I'm sure there are many more days like that for us all to look forward too😁 X

@polelynn I think you're so right that we all strong to be functioning while feeling like this. I hide my illness well...it's been so many years that while you mention going away to concentrate on recovering, I feel I want to hide away but @maidenpink is right we still would have to come back and adapt to life...
We will get through this challenging journey and as mentioned we will all be stronger!
It makes such a difference having a supportive GP with people skills.

Glad you and @maidenpink are having a calmer day. I find having a nice social gathering can be a positive distraction for me.

@Maidenpink was meant to be a smiley face above!

I'm going to try and get sleeping pills again as I'm really struggling at night. I don't look forward to doing anything in the evening (no TV, reading etc)...I don't know what's happened... maybe too much time at home!

I really have an issue with getting treated badly at times..it's like a form of self harm. Also reckless behaviour at times. It's like I feel I don't deserve better...

I hope you all get a good rest tonight XXX

@sugarlost I can't even express how much too much time at home will have affected you, me ... everyone. It's like there's no pleasure in leisure any more ... no novelty to a box set or excitement over time to read. It's all really samey and that's definitely fueled my depression. Sorry you aren't sleeping, that is so hard. I found when the medication started kicking in my sleep improved although I'm still prone to waking in the night and have trouble getting back over.

Do you want to elaborate on being treated badly? I know you've mentioned boundaries being an issue before. It can be a vicious cycle when you have low self-esteem, low self-worth, you don't have firm boundaries because you feel you aren't worth them, then you let people treat you badly and that just makes you feel more worthless and on it goes. I have been there and dealing with that is one of the most difficult things I've had to do (and I'm still not there). Hugs x

@sugarlost I hope you managed to get some sleep last night. If not sleeping tablets sound like a good short term plan to get you back on track. I hope work goes well today. X

Sun is finally out again here and it looks like it's finally warning up.

Morning all,

@Maidenpink I didn't recently think about the too much time at home doing the same thing taking the enjoyment out of normal leisure things... you are right and it's definitely not helping me mentally.I just don't know what to do other then go to bed early...
I too wake at night and find it difficult to go back to sleep.

You're so right about the vicious cycle. Feeling worthless is the exact description of how I often feel.
Regarding the boundaries...one area is that recently I was trying to online date again and it's so difficult. I know I would like a long term relationship but I'm not getting any luck and it's as if I have to accept What's being offered or I may just not get anything. It's definitely not helping my self esteem so I may just try and accept it's not meant to be. I'm ok bring single most of the time but sometimes it's hard. Covid was a reminder of that and how isolating it can be at times.

Sending hugs back, I hope you get there regarding working on yourself with boundaries... I feel as it can be ongoing work in this life.
Wishing you a calm and relaxing day x

@polelynn I feel tired today as again I woke up and found it hard to go back to sleep.
I will call The GP when I can work out a good day for a telephone appointment... the tiredness is not helping my mood. I feel a bit upset because of the dating issue touched on above. I'm going to try and do some form of exercise today to help me mentally as did nothing yesterday.

I hope you have a lovely bright day and thanks for your wishes x

@FiloFaxx I hope you slept well and are having a good morning x

Hello all,

@polelynn and @Maidenpink glad you both had better days yesterday.

You're right it's a bit of an anxious time trying to get things sorted. I have days I feel a bit better and think actually I'm fine maybe I'm washing time. I think I'll take up husbands offer a full night sleep I'm just not sure I'll sleep easily knowing baby is awake 🤔

Sadly I've felt so so anxious today. I don't know if side effects make anxiety worse but I've been worrying about really silly things and playing with my hair and another bad habit I have developed through anxiety.

@sugarlost how are you feeling this afternoon? Did you manage some exercise? I can understand what you're saying about dating and self esteem. I was younger than I am now but my anxiety and self esteem seems from then.

Hi all ❤

@sugarlost I have a friend who has described the exact same thing you did about online dating. It sounds like it can be soul destroying. From what she told me a lot of people come across as really shallow and materialistic. I wonder if the service you use would make a difference to the types of people you would meet. I'm afraid I don't know an awful lot about them but I can understand the difficulties you describe.

@filofaxx sorry you've been anxious today. I do think fluoxetine can increase anxiety for the first 2 or 3 weeks. I think it made my mind race quite a bit but it does calm down again. I got prescribed some diazepam to use to get through those early weeks ... I don't like taking it but I did on a few days because my anxiety was so bad. It may be a short term option to consider. Some days are better than others but please don't think of yourself as time wasting at all.

@polelynn hope you've had a good day.

I was really anxious this morning. Was going to visit a friend and do a bit of therapy with her so the anticipation was making my tension and intrusive thoughts worse. We had a talk and I just feel utterly spent tonight. Into the sea again tomorrow tho.

Xxx

Hello all.

Seems that we will all have better days and more difficult ones and accepting that that is okay. The good ones will eventually dim down those bad ones.

I'm doing okay. Still feeling calmer. I have a few things potentially coming up and starting to feel a bit under pressure to step up and do things I'm currently very uncomfortable with. I'm going to go at my own pace and with the support of my treatment but when I'm feeling more positive I'm curious to see if/how I manage rather than absolutely dreading them which is most definitely an improvement. It will be good to start to have a fuller life again rather than my current very isolated state.

Hi everyone,

How we all doing? I'm okay ish. Feel a bit calmer today. Had a busy, social day yesterday which I managed although if I'm honest I was tense inside and having a lot of low intrusive thoughts. But I could keep going through it and had a lovely swim too. You just don't wake up one day with this shit gone. It's a gradual process. Got my first vaccine tomor so I'm anxious about that. It's not so much the thing itself, it's the increase in intrusive thoughts and bad feelings that might arise from the anxiety. But I will go.

@polelynn I think that gradual increase in feeling curiosity about how challenges will go instead of complete fear is a really good sign. It isn't easy doing things you haven't been able to for a long time, and you might not enjoy them but every time you do something you give yourself the message that things are safer. Will you be able to do smaller things first to try to build up your confidence?

Hope everyone is doing okay. X

Hi all☀️
How are you? I hope well

@FiloFaxx in the past I would pull my hair out... I'm not sure why I did it... if I liked the feeling/anxiety but I managed to stop.
I hope you're feeling less anxious.

I did not manage to do exercise that afternoon as intended as I became distracted and a friend needed help.

RE dating it does negatively affect me sadly...I think it does that to many people and unfortunately you experienced it too. My mind is all over the place recently... lots happening which causes me to have highs and lows. Currently I'm having a quiet moment, I went out earlier which was good but feeling exhausted now and will probably eat and have an early night. I'm very fortunate to have friends and family...I must try and remember this and also the support you all provide me

@Maidenpink you reminded me the site I'm using isn't the best one for what I'm looking for which I knew but pushed to the back of my mind in the hope it's a numbers game and I may meet someone. I did communicate with someone who seemed ok but there was no spark and I thought do I really want this? Anyway I've deleted the app and feel relieved and disappointed. I've tried most of the sites... maybe I'll try another one Which may be more suitable when I'm feeling more positive.
Unfortunately there are alot of shallow and materialistic people online...

Sorry the anticipation of your therapy made you feel anxious. Hopefully in time those intrusive thoughts will reduce. I hope you felt much better having a swim in the sea😊

@polelynn good to hear you're feeling calmer...at the moment I feel like am and I hope it lasts for the evening. I think taking things at your own pace is the way to go especially when we're feeling fragile. So good your getting support to help you move forward and also feel less isolated.

This morning when I was going out I was upset thinking of being single and also feeling a little unwell but I'm going to try and push the dating to the back of my mind until I'm in a stronger place. I think my period is due which is why I'm also not feeling great.

@Maidenpink Glad you're feeling calmer, it's good you managed to get through your busy social day. I often feel like I'm putting on a brave face when I'm out socialising some times and also waiting for friends to turn up I can feel self conscious.

I wish I could wake up and feel happy and positive most days but you're right about the gradual process....

I really hope your intrusive thoughts don't increase and the vaccine process is fine.

I'm so pleased you have your swimming to look forward too ..these think make such a difference 😊

Thinking of you all🧡🧡🧡

@sugarlost I think focussing on yourself right now is definitely for the best. That way you can focus on strengthening your boundaries and increase your self-worth and if/when you feel ready to re-engage with the dating scene, these strengths will serve you well. Remember you are enough ❤️. It's really good to hear you are feeling calmer too.

@Maidenpink I think that's the crux, building up exposures so that I can start to feel that doing these things are okay and not to be feared in the way I have. I've already tried with a couple of small things at home and tried to accept my thoughts and the uncertainty rather than ruminating or seeking reassurance. Slowly, slowly.

Well done for keeping going yesterday despite those thoughts. I can totally understand your feelings about your vaccination tomorrow. The whole situation is pretty loaded which is bound to increase anyone's anxiety not least though of us who suffer from it. It's funny as when I heard vaccines had the go ahead a few months ago I cried with relief as I knew it was a way out but that sense of relief has now been replaced with yet more fear. I now understand and accept that that is my anxiety. Are you able to take someone with you?

@FiloFaxx how are you?

Morning, how is everyone?☀️

@polelynn I feel better not being online. Thanks for your kind words 🧡. I think as long as I engage with unsuitable men my self worth will be harder to increase. It is definitely about looking at strengthening my boundaries in all areas of my life too .

I have been able to spend time with friends and family which has helped my mood as well as the sunshine coming out. I'm thankful for this.

It's good you are aware of what steps to take to help you going forward and you have started to take some small steps at home. I'm sure it will become easier over time whilst continuing to take things at a pace that is right for you 🧡

@Maidenpink I hope your vaccine appointment went well. Thinking of you🧡

@FiloFaxx I hope you have managed to get some rest💤

XXX

Morning everyone. Sorry I've been AWOL.

@Maidenpink how are you feeling? How as your vaccine?

@polelynn hope you're still feeling a bit calmer while taking your small steps.

@sugarlost glad to hear you've enjoyed some time in the sun with friends. I'm trying to take online breaks not from dating but from mum groups that set me off when I hear about mums breastfeeding it any other thing I feel like I'm failing at!

Sleep is still up and down. On Thursday there I felt so anxious most of the day and also on Friday I wasn't feeling that great. But yesterday I felt a lot calmer despite my hubby being out and I had the two kids all day on my own 🤔 don't know if it's the meds kicking in or how I would have felt anyway.

Hi everyone ❤

@sugarlost I think that sounds really positive about coming off the dating up for the moment. It doesn't need to be forever but a break at this time will give you space to build up your strength and work on your boundaries a bit more. Glad to hear you getting the opportunity to connect with friends and family a bit more too.

@polelynn how've you been this weekend? Hoping still settled.

@filofaxx glad the weekend has been better for you after a hard couple of days. I think as we've said before on here the road to recovery is not a smooth one. Over time the better days begin to outweigh the bad days I think, and the bad days become less bad overall.

I'm doing okay. Got the vaccine yesterday and it's been fine so far. It really helped that my neighbours were getting theirs at the same time so talking to people kept me grounded. It was weirdly quite a fun experience. There was a buzz about the place and it felt good to be doing my civic duty with everyone. It felt hopeful. So my mood was okay yesterday and so far okay today too. Just my arm a tiny bit sore. But really not anything like I feared it would be. @polelynn try to hold onto that, the anticipation will nearly always be worse than the actual thing.

It's very sunny today and I definitely think that helps my mood. My mind isn't racing like it was for weeks there and I feel more like myself today. That's me 6 weeks on 40mg.

Hope you are all having a lovely day. 🌞

Wanted to share that I've just been out today for the first time in months, with my DH and DD. I went to a small local outdoor nursery to get some plants. A couple of people came close (too close for my liking tbh) but I didn't totally panic though felt very uncomfortable. Mind was whirring for a long time afterwards with intrusive negative thoughts and I felt very on edge but I accept that that's going to happen. Was a huge step for me in getting back to my old life.

@Maidenpink well done for yesterday. It was in no small part the bravery I've seen displayed by you that made me feel like I have to take this next step now. There is no other option otherwise I'm simply not living. Hugs.

@sugarlost so pleased to hear you've been making connections with family & friends. Being with others (the right type of people anyway) can really lift us and help us to forget for a while what we are having to deal with privately.

@FiloFaxx I'm glad you are feeling more positive and that you had a good day with your DC. The good days will definitely feature more and more but please don't be too disheartened if/when you have a bad day. You'll see from our journeys that this is very much to be expected, particularly on medication. Have you managed to get that good night's sleep yet?

Omg @polelynn!!! Massive, massive well done ... that is HUGE! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼💖💖💖 Feel quite emotional for you. To tolerate the anxiety that would have provoked is just an incredible achievement. Such an important step in your recovery. Big hugs back to you. Just delighted for you.