Fluoxetine - has it helped?

[TwoAndMe]

Just outside the chemist waiting to pick up a prescription of this medication. It's taken many months for to finally accept that I have to try this medication.
I have had a difficult year, haven't we all?! I'm a nurse and really struggled with work and home schooling my dc's (15 and 13). They're a little older so I have been able to leave them to it. I have had to, I'm a single parent. However, they've struggled at times and needed my help, which is absolutely fine but it's hard with work etc. I. Just exhausted. I am also managing a few physical health issues that it now appears to be stress/anxiety related. I have absolutely no motivation and feel flat most of the time. I feel so guilty as I feel irritable too. Everything just feels like too much. I know what i should be doing but struggling to do it.
I'm wondering what your experience is/was with this medication?

OK, cards on the table - today has been really rubbish. Lots of crying & an anxious knot in my stomach (like I'm about to sit an exam). I feel exhausted & like I have a metal band squeezing my head. At one point I nearly called my GP as I felt so concerned about my negative, spiralling thoughts. But I went for a walk & I'm now preparing a meal & will see how I feel tomorrow. I am so sick of this rollercoaster ride. A friend said she felt better around the 3 week mark so there's a way for me to go yet.

@TwoAndMe How are you this Monday? Mondays are often a tough day for some reason.

@JackieWeaverhastheauthority I can so relate to your lockdown issues. It's been incredibly tough. But I think I was so busy plodding along I hadn't noticed how rubbish I was feeling. Have you had any side effects from increasing your dose? I hope you feel better soon x

Oh yes, you absolutely have to stick out the first few weeks. It's tough but know there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Increased dose also combined with a change in timing - i used to take it before bed but i'm now taking it in the morning because my sleep was terrible. So a bit hard to judge difference at the moment because of that transition. My sleep has been better though.

Thanks @JackieWeaverhastheauthority - I need to hear that it's worth hanging in there & sticking with it x

AppleBlossomTimeNow I'm sorry you had a difficult Monday. Did you speak to your GP. No harm in calling him if you feel you need to. I'm glad you were able to distract yourself. That is sometimes so difficult to do. How are you today? Hope you are ok?! You are right Mondays always appear more difficult for me too. However, I was off work yesterday. Today, I found difficult returning to work again. Sometimes I think it's good for me, to keep me motivated, then I wonder how much of it contributes to how I feel and the physical impact. So a few tears this morning. Then I had to get to work, all red faced.
I still feel quite flat. I'm hoping that will change. Just made pancakes for my girls. Now going to have a bath and get into bed and watch a film.
JackieWeaverhastheauthority glad you are sleeping better. I think that's a big factor of low mood if you haven't slept.

@TwoAndMe Are the anti-ds helping you at all yet? I feel exactly the same as you re work - the structure & purpose is useful but sometimes I feel wobbly & overwhelmed, and that affects my self esteem & mood. I am having a better day today & have been able to shift a few things around so the rest of the week should be easy. I need to dial things back whilst the meds kick in or the anxiety gets a grip. I've also contacted Occupational Health at work for a referral to discuss a temporary reduction in hours & to flag that I'm struggling. I hate admitting that I'm not doing OK but needs must. I hope you have a good day x

AppleBlossomTimeNow I'm glad your week is looking better for you and you have spoken to OH. Reducing your hours may help. I know how you feel re speaking about how you are feeling. It's not an easy subject. It's going to feel uncomfortable but will lift so much weight off your mind. I was so fixated on putting on a front of, I'm absolutely fine that it became exhausting. I'm glad I have spoken to my manager, it felt a relief. I hope you feel this too as you are doing the right thing for you and that's what's important.
I'm not sure about the medication yet. I am giving myself 3 weeks, so another week.
I'm glad you have had a better day. Hope tomorrow is the same x

@TwoAndMe thank you - you are so lovely! I'm sorry to hear that you're not sure about the meds - three weeks is a reasonable amount of time to see some improvement, and I gather arriving at the right type of SSRI at the right dose can take time. It's frustrating & disappointing not to feel any benefit especially when the decision to go on them was so carefully considered. Are you feeling the same, worse or any better at all eg improvements in sleep, mood or swallowing? Be patient - the benefits may creep up on you rather than arrive with a fanfare x

AppleBlossomTimeNow morning 😊 thankyou. You are lovely too.
You're right in saying about the benefits creeping in. I was thinking this yesterday. I have started to write in a journal. It may sound only small but I was driving in my car and I turned the music up when I heard a song I liked. Music is something I have always enjoyed, however, music is something that I lost interest in over the months. Like many other things. So, for me, I think this was a positive. Maybe only a small change on that one particular day but it's a shift. My sleep isn't great. I go off ok, then I wake a few times during the night. 2, 3 o'clock. When I wake, I don't seem to go back off into a deep sleep. I'm still half aware. Then I get up at 6 to make some tea. The swallowing is the same. I had a session with the therapist yesterday. He has extended my appointment times, so I see him again in 3 weeks. There is only so much he can do. He advised me to seek support through works wellbeing service. He explained that there is something more psychological going on as all results show physically my swallow reflex is working as it should. So I called them yesterday. It's still difficult for me to believe that this has happened to me due to my experiences.
How are you sleeping? When is your appt with OH? Do you think you have noticed any small positive changes?
I hope you have a good day xx

Morning! I am sleeping much better. - and feel more relaxed (sedated?!) during the day. But I can still spiral into self doubt, worry & worthlessness. Baby steps though.

I don't think it is at all strange that mental health issues have physical manifestations - think of selective mutism or of shell shock in WWI or vomiting with anxiety - the brain & body are entwined. If the placebo effect can impart measurable physical benefits with just the power of the mind, then it stands to reason that the reverse must be true.

After years of stress & soldiering on, your body is saying 'enough'. It feels dramatic & sudden, but I think it is incremental - the pandemic was just the last straw for you. Your body & brain have been flooded with stress hormones for months/years & it places huge demands on your health. Have you read up about 'burnout'? It is a medical condition where overworked adrenal glands & a body constantly full of adrenaline & cortisol just stops working properly, leading to fatigue, infections & auto immune conditions. You've successfully over-ridden your brain's signals in stressful situations to enable you to work & support your family...and now perhaps your body is saying 'enough'.

You sound like someone who has always put the needs of others first, but now you need to look after yourself. You may be hoping your colleagues will give you permission to do this but I suspect under the circumstances that won't be forthcoming - you need to give that permission to yourself. Focus on your health & recovery, or you will slowly grind to a halt. You are SO strong to get this far. But that strength has actually done you a disservice because it allowed you to carry on when you were spent, leading to where you are now. The meds will hopefully help you manage the symptoms but perhaps 'business as usual' is no longer an option.

I think you are amazing x

AppleBlossomTimeNow wow, yes, that makes so much sense. Interesting too. You are right. That's true, I guess I find it hard to believe it's happened to me. I don't know why as it can happen to anyone.
Thankyou so much for your kind words. You have been so lovely and I feel your support. Yes, I do need to give myself that permission to look after myself and concentrate on my recovery. I'm going to continue with my working hours but if I feel it's too much, I will reduce them again.
I find it very difficult to admit I'm struggling. However, being able to express my vulnerability has been a release. I think it's because I sense so much trust and understanding here and with my therapist.
It's been 2 weeks now. That has gone by quickly. I'm glad you are sleeping well, that's a positive. Definitely, baby steps.
That's something I have to keep telling myself.
What do you have planned today? Have you met up with your friend for another walk? It's been nice not having to home school this week hasn't it?
I do hope you have another relaxed day planned. Look after yourself xx

@TwoAndMe - Why is admitting we are struggling so hard? I find it particularly mortifying to admit to at work, which is extraordinary as if I had a physical illness I wouldn't hesitate to take time off or ask for additional support. My boss even has a background in psychiatry but to tell him I have been living with anxiety/depression since October makes me feel so weak & uncomfortable. It feels like a failing.

I'm planning some walks with friends this w/e as my children are with their dad. A break from homeschooling has been lovely - we've all benefitted though I wish the weather had been better! I have an appt with my counsellor next week too, so have been saving up things to discuss with him! I def feel better from improved sleep but I feel lacking in energy & motivation from the meds - at least when anxious I get a lot done (ha ha).

I hope you have a lovely weekend & get some fresh air & (hopefully) sunshine on your face. Take care & be gentle with your good self x

Hi I hope you don't mind me butting into the thread. Also single parent struggling and mental health getting worse by the day. How are things now, do you think the fluoxetine is helping?
I am going to ask for my dose to be doubled tomorrow as I have been at breaking point for awhile now and there seems to be no end in sight and no support until the pandemic is over.
I'm nervous though, because I'm worried that increasing my dose will make me apathetic and get less done. I'm already unproductive these days, and I'm trying to weigh up help with my mood/anxiety with feelings of apathy and what that might do to me, as I think I remember the last time I increased it a few years ago I got apathetic and just sat in a chair spaced out and didn't care about anything. I won't be able to do that anyway this time because of kids around all day. I hope you are all doing ok and things are improving. It really is such a difficult time.

About 10 years ago I took fluoxetine when I was peri menopausal, I was on them for about 4 months, and just stopped dead with no tapering and no bad effects from stopping.
They definitely helped my anxiety and the inner rage I had at the time.
I stopped because of the vivid dreams I was having. I was also NHS, I'd dream things like I'd done an audit, then when in work I'd get bollocked for not having done it, or I'd wake up in a terrible state thinking I was late for work on my day off.
I used the counselling service at work, but I lived too far away to want to travel in on my days off, and the service couldn't accommodate my shift patterns.

OP, my experience and it is a common one, is that it is very slow to start working. I had severe depression when I started on it and it took about three months to lift. Just warning you.

Some others - e.g. Citalopram were much faster acting ime, and if you need a short term boost because your are feeling understandably very low due to circumstances, then it may not be the best. But it works well and it has a very long half life, so if you titrate very slowly when you come off it, there are no side effects and you really can get back to normal without any jags.

If you are starting it, start lots of other wellbeing practises along side it, to support it until it takes hold. B-vitamin complex, maybe Floradix or another gentle tonic, 10 minutes HIIT or yoga each day, 10 mins journalling, meditation or affirmations etc - set aside half an hour to do these things, if you can. 30 minutes outside - even if taken in tiny breaks of 5 mins having a coffee on the kitchen doorstep etc. All these things help.

AppleBlossomTimeNow I ask myself that question. I guess it's because unlike a physical illness, it's a hidden illness. For me, I automatically think people won't understand. I don't want to be judged. Silly really because it would upset me to know someone is struggling that way. Please don't think that it's failing. You think I'm amazing. Well, I think you are. Speaking to your boss is such a brave thing to do, for you. It's uncomfortable but it's a move in the right direction for YOU! This is what I keep telling myself. I want to get better. I deserve to get better. Whatever uncomfort I may feel along the way, it has to be worth it. It's about putting ourselves first and discarding any thoughts we tell ourselves about being judged. Is this a truth anyway. It's a little voice in our heads. I try to think, whatever anyone thinks (I will never know that), I can't change it, also does it matter. What matters is, looking after ourselves how we advise others, how we deserve to be looked after.
I'm glad you have all found benefited from having time off. I'm preparing myself to get back to it next week aswell as increased hours. One day at a time!
My anxiety has reduced. I was left feeling unmotivated before the meds so no different for me. I needed the meds to think more clearly and rationalise my overpowering thought process. I'm hoping I find the motivation too. Is it a release for you, feeling less anxious even though you feel a little spaced out? Maybe it's the early symptoms of the medication. It's s quite early days for us but we are moving forward. You are doing all the right things. I hope you are having a lovely weekend x
Jan9876 hello, of course not, you are very welcome. I'm sorry you are struggling. It is such a difficult time. Posting here as helped me feel less alone in feeling alone. Also speaking with a therapist. For me, it's eased the anxiety. That was making my thought process spiral out of control some days. I could not think clearly. I would think so irrationally. I was unmotivated and apathetic anyway. I had nothing to lose. I want to feel but I knew, for me, I needed to calm the anxiety first. I am scared the medication may continue to make me feel less. It's early days but I have seen small changes. Positive changes to moving forward. The only negative is my sleep pattern. Its dreadful.
How long have you been taking this medication? Discuss with your GP, if this is the right SSRI. I know this dose can be increased, however, it's about finding something that helps not makes things more difficult. It maybe takes a while to find the right one for us. The situation is difficult at the moment. Please, if you feel it may help, come and chat here. It has really helped me. Don't feel you are alone. I'm glad you are talking to you GP tomorrow x

Hi everyone....is it okay if I join? I have been on / off anti depressants all my life. I've recently started fluoxetine again after sertraline didn't help.

I have found they have numbed me slightly which is good as my anxiety was through the roof...panic attacks, crying nearly everyday for a year....such a mess really and constant crying.

I don't feel happy at all still...but I'm not crying / panicking so that must be slightly better. I still feel like I have no motivation to do anything 😪

Also single mum to 2 teens....hope everyone is okay.

@bangheadhere40 - hmm, low motivation is often a sign of dopamine deficiency and fluoxetine is a seratonin re-uptake inhibitor. You could try taking L-tyrosine and DLPA supplements with magnesium to see if they boost your motivation. I ended up doing that as the ADs stopped the unhappiness but didn't deal with that flat-tyre/frozen computer feeling of being unable to even clean your teeth or pick up something you've dropped on the floor. L-tyrosine helps though I found it gave me sharp headaches.

cherrytree63 I'm glad they helped at the time. Those nightmares sound awful. It's strange how it can have a different impact on each of us.
Labobo thankyou, yes, I understand it's going to be a slow process. All the things you mentioned ate great and a few I had planned, however, my lack of motivation was stopping me from helping myself. I have started journaling and I practice meditation. I will eventually add more to my list. I have also made an appointment with the wellbeing service.
bangheadhere40 hello, if course, you are welcome. I'm sorry you are feeling so unhappy. This situation we are all living through is difficult. So difficult. I hope that new medication gives you some changes to how you feel. It's surprising how many people are lacking motivation at the moment.

Welcome everybody & it's so good you've found this thread! @TwoAndMe - hello again. You write so, so well & your kind words are so reassuring. Thank you x

I've decided to take my meds at 4pm (I've set an alarm on my phone), as I was feeling so sleepy mid-afternoon. I'll let you know how I get on. I hope it helps. I went for an unexpectedly long walk with a friend yesterday (20km!) and the pride I felt accomplishing that, as well as some lovely mild weather gave me such a boost. Being outside really, really helps me. I think trying to live day by day is helpful advice too. There will be bad days, and sad days, but as long as the general trend is positive that's got to be the thing to focus on.

I'm so grateful my sleep has improved on the meds (slightly more vivid dreams but not bad ones, touch wood), it must be frustrating that you are still struggling @TwoAndMe - maybe mention that at your review appt with your GP, as mine said that if I saw no improvement, he'd prescribe a short dose of sleeping pills just to help 'reset' my body clock. Something to consider, anyway.

I hope we all have good weeks this week. And hop on this thread if you need to chat, vent or need reassurance - it's been enormously helpful for me.

How is everyone, very impressed with your 20km apple. Being outside is a key thing that helps me too, but the weather has been really grim. And when nice days come around I really want to get out but sometimes I don't have the energy/motivation to force dc to go out when they don't want to. I know it will do them good but they just won't budge without a fight and there are no bribes left anymore lol.
Labobo that sounds interesting, I have ordered some DLPA as my motivation is really low.
Banghead sorry you are struggling so much, really hope things improve for you.
I'm 'seeing' a counsellor today I really hope it helps as it is so expensive! Going to try to get outside today. Half term is over and homeschooling is back - not looking forward to that and worried it will push me over an edge. Hope everyone is ok. I felt bad yesterday as my dc knew I was sad, usually I can hide it, but I couldn't. I was just honest about it and said everyone gets a bit sad sometimes especially in this pandemic! I hope it doesn't mess them up seeing their mum sad!

twoandme thank you for your lovely message. I'm sorry your sleep is so bad, I'm sure that makes things harder during the day as when I'm tired I find it so hard to cope.
I have tried other tablets before and this one seems the best fit, the other ones have too many bad side effects for me. But I'll check with the DR as I really don't want anything making me feel worse.

@jan9876 Your children won't be adversely affected by seeing you sad & upset - you are human. They won't like seeing their mum tearful but it sounds like you handled it well. Crying & then recovering & then explaining that the pandemic is getting to you is fine x

AppleBlossomTimeNow 20k!! Wow, impressive! That's one long walk. I'm glad it gave you a boost. The nicer weather certainly helps. It was a lovely day here yesterday so I had a little walk on my lunch break. Spring is on its way! That's a good plan with your meds, hope this helps. I'm taking mine in the morning now. Only because, I fell asleep on the Friday and missed a dose so took it first thing the next day. An alarm is a good idea.
Yes, I think I will mention my sleep pattern to my GP. I'm waking every morning at 5, after broken sleep. Not that that's a bad thing, it gives me time in the morning to get things done before work. I am worried it will catch up with me. I woke at 5.20 this morning and I slept from 10.30 pm, so not too bad. I started back yesterday with my increased hours. Long story short, I have been eased back in with minimal work and not had the pressures of meetings etc. Yesterday, I didn't experience any anxiety so I'm hoping this will continue. I have decided to give myself 3 months on tgese hours and if it's too much, I will reduce again. Hope you are well x
Jan9876 you are welcome! I think, like AppleBlossomTimeNow mentioned, we will have sad days too, and that's ok. Our journey is about looking after ourselves and learning along the way to do that well. I know sometimes we feel that hiding emotions is protecting our children but honestly, it's helping them understand and learn that it's ok to be sad sometimes. I'm sad because.... You are sad because what we are living through is difficult, so difficult.
Feeling and understanding emotions is a part of learning and growing up. Repressing emotions can Be quite harmful for us in the long run as one day they will all come out in ways we don't understand. I feel, that's when children question why they're angry or frustrated or sad, they can't find a reason. It's ok to be sad sometimes. Mum is human like AppleBlossomTimeNow said. Please be kind to yourself. I do hope you had a better day yesterday. Did you manage to get outdoors? How did your session with the counsellor go?
Hope you all have a lovely day! I hope the sun shines again today. I'm sat listening to the birds and drinking tea, it's very peaceful.
Sending my thoughts to you all xxx

@TwoAndMe - easing back in to longer hours & giving yourself 3 months to test it out sounds v sensible. I'm so glad you didn't feel anxious - long may it continue! I've had a good day today too - another walk & getting stuff done for work that I'd normally put off.

Thanks Apple showing emotions at times is just being human, I grew up in a household where emotions where hidden and it really didn't help, so I guess it's not the worst thing to happen to them

Twoandme I hope work goes ok for you, I liked the thought of you sitting up early getting some nice quiet time and a cup of tea. Thats great you didn't have anxiety yesterday I hope this continues.

I am exhausted, I'm on day 2 of the increase and woke up at 4 not able to to get back to sleep. I'm also worried about my dd who is not coping at the minute and her behaviour is very challenging. It is so hard! I just so need the schools to go back! Hopefully the rain will be off today and I can get her outdoors for a bit which will help.

I cancelled the counselling. I joined BetterHelp counselling and I really don't recommend it. The counsellor herself was fine, but I was paying for weekly session, it took 2 weeks to get matched with her, the first session was 30 minutes, the next week the system crashed and I couldn't connect with her, so all in all I've paid a months counselling and only got 30 minute phone call. They are also supposed to be available on text as well, but they aren't, a robot apparently texts back lol. Not impressed, although in the 30 minutes I did get a bit of a boost. Not going to try anything again for awhile. I have plenty of tools I can use - I just need to start using them. I've started doing a short relaxation exercise every evening. And trying to use a filly schedule with dc. Hopefully these small things will help. Hope you are all ok tough going at the minute.