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Original poster

Christmas in hospital

34 replies

JuiceyBetty · 17/11/2020 19:25

I'm feeling really sorry for myself :(

I've been an inpatient for 8 weeks now and I'm sectioned, today moved onto section 3. I won't be going home for Christmas and I'm heartbroken. With covid I don't even know if I'll get leave anyway but section 17 would only give me a day at home.

The thought of it is breaking my heart and making me spiral even further. I spent last Christmas in here too (went home in Feb) but was able to go home for 5 days over Christmas. They're saying home leave probably won't be possible due to covid.

I can't bear it. I have young DC and can't face the thought of not being there when they wake on Christmas morning. it's making me suicidal.

OP posts:
Original poster
JuiceyBetty · 17/11/2020 19:28

Oh, and I can't let go of the fact that I can't go home on Dec 1st to put up our tree due to lockdown. That's the tradition I love the most.

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NoRoomInBed · 17/11/2020 19:29

Bumping for you as I'm shit with any advice. Hopefully someone comes along that can help. I'm sorry it's so shit right now.

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 17/11/2020 19:37

I’m so sorry you’re experiencing this , OP.

It’s not great, but another way to look at it is that you’re getting the help you need so that you can be well for many Christmases to come.

My Mum once had to spend Christmas in hospital when I was young after a major operation. I’m sure it was heartbreaking for her, but I honestly don’t think about that Christmas, I remember all the other happy memories with her.

Focus on getting better and being back with your family when it’s possible.💐

PurpleFrames · 17/11/2020 19:50

Hey OP- I'm sorry to hear your news it must be really painful. Is this your first section? Do you understand what you need to do/where you need to be to get home? Can you get day leave atm?

Someone1987 · 17/11/2020 20:14

@JuiceyBetty I'm so sorry you are having a difficult time.

What is a section 3? How long will you have to be in there for?

Thinking of you

Jamhandprints · 17/11/2020 20:21

Be strong Juicey, better to get well now and celebrate properly next Christmas.
I'm sure your kids miss you but they will have adapted to their new routine so they'll be fine for now. You can make up for any missed celebrations when you are well. Flowers

Lottieis44 · 17/11/2020 20:53

Use the time, engage with everyone so you have better Christmas's to look forward to.

Original poster
JuiceyBetty · 18/11/2020 18:30

A section 3 lasts for up to six months, @Someone1987.

I can't bear it. I truly can't.

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SparklingLime · 18/11/2020 20:57

That sounds so hard, @JuiceyBetty. Are there any members of staff you can talk to about the impact this is having on you? Flowers

candle18 · 18/11/2020 21:00

Really sorry you’re going through this. Who is at home with your dc’s? Are they not allowed to visit due to Covid? Can the ward give you access to an iPad or are you able to FaceTime them from your phone so you can maybe have some time together when they are putting up the tree/opening their presents. I know it’s not the same but might feel a bit better.

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 18/11/2020 21:01

You’ll find the strength to bear it because you want to be well and back with your children. Honestly, you will. 💐. Keep focusing on being with them again when you’re well.

Broadbeanssleeping · 18/11/2020 21:08

Speak to your solicitor or IMHA? See if they can argue your case? If the clinicians know that it is making you feel worse they might rethink. Ask your nearest to back you up too.
It sounds very distressing.
Ask to talk through with someone the reasons for being detained.

Someone1987 · 18/11/2020 21:27

@JuiceyBetty I'm so sorry, I really feel for you. Is there anyway you could get out earlier (not sure why you are on a section) but worth asking whether you could at least have some leave over Xmas. Do you have support at home?
We are here for you. Please keep talking. X

Original poster
JuiceyBetty · 18/11/2020 21:27

I saw the AMP yesterday and the case presented was pretty much clear cut due to my dangerous behaviours.

Kids can't visit due to covid rules so we're living via FaceTime at the moment. They're home with their dad. The biggest problem is the wifi is TERRIBLE here and I can only get it out in the garden which isn't ideal.

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Original poster
JuiceyBetty · 18/11/2020 21:28

Thanks, someone. I have a great support system at home and last year was allowed 5 days home but I wasn't sectioned then. I'm going to speak to my consultant about it in ward round but I'm really feeling do despondent, I've been distressed all day.

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Starlightstarbright1 · 18/11/2020 21:35

It is really tough.. sectoons aren't given out lightly

My advice as someone who has been where you are. Use the pkace , get a focus on where you need to be to be there for your children. Plan a second Christmas for when you are well enough to go home.

Give yourself goals, even if it is get dressed, brush teeth. Find something you enjoy doing- if you enjoy reading and haven't got the energy read magazines if you can't face books. Relaxation

Think back to what helped last time

SparklingLime · 18/11/2020 21:59

If that’s the hospital wifi you’re using then a dongle might help?

www.moneysavingexpert.com/broadband-and-tv/cheap-mobile-broadband/

PurpleFrames · 18/11/2020 22:55

Do you have an occupational therapist on your ward? I know it's pretty rare these days but even an hour a week of activity could be something to look forward too x

Original poster
JuiceyBetty · 19/11/2020 15:24

Sadly no occupation therapist.

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Original poster
JuiceyBetty · 19/11/2020 15:24

Which is mad considering this is a private hospital costing a grand a day...

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PurpleFrames · 19/11/2020 17:37

Will you be moved back to NHS for discharge or are you self funding? As hard as it is to imagine private is so superior to NHS wards so hopefully you can take something from that... :( although it's a very crap situation

Original poster
JuiceyBetty · 19/11/2020 18:37

No, I won't be going to NHS. I'm covered by medical insurance thankfully.

I've been in NHS before and it was a thousand times worse, so I feel very lucky.

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CatherineCawood · 20/11/2020 11:50

I'm so sorry you are going through this incredibly difficult time. Better connection to your family via 4G might make you feel better? A dongle suggested by a PP is a great idea. Is there somewhere in the hospital that gives better wifi that you can facetime from?

Would they be allowed to visit you on xmas day outside in the garden, even if only socially distanced? You could at least watch them open some gifts. Can you order some toys etc on the internet for you to wrap and then give to them on the day?

I hope that you are getting all the support you need X

Original poster
JuiceyBetty · 20/11/2020 14:22

How do dongles work? None of us get 4g on our phones (we think there's a blocker) unless we go out to the back of the garden.

I have no idea what will happen on Christmas Day. Neither do the staff. They keep saying to wait and see what happens with lockdown, so that's all I can do.

Thanks @CatherineCawood

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PurpleFrames · 20/11/2020 21:11

That's really rubbish about the plans, maybe they don't want to overpromise incase things fall through.. Another patient had a birthday on my ward and we did a card and decorations, so hopefully you will get similar...

Do you have a ward manager? I found sometimes they were easier to approach than the Doctors.