Health anxiety

[Mvshrln]

Hi all,

I've seen a couple of health anxiety threads on here but they're all quite old/inactive and wondered if there were any more recent ones, or if anyone fancied discussing it via this new thread? It's helpful when someone else knows how you feel.

I really struggle with HA, the thoughts bounce around my head until I fixate on one and worry about it relentlessly. I can see why the anxiety has appeared (friends parent passed away, the covid-19 situation has terrified me, I'm getting older/have life events happening like buying a house, and I also work within the hospice sector). It's helpful to know why but it doesn't help with how to deal with it! I'm currently taking venlafaxine and CBT counselling via videocall but the worry takes up huge chunks of my day.

Nightmare! How is everyone else?

Thank you lib3rtine! Best of luck with your scan do let us know how you get on xx

Hi @Goolies sorry you are struggling, that sounds ok to me too, I think I have something similar, I can feel the edges too. I hope you have had a better night and are feeling a bit more positive this morning, it’s so hard to think about anything else when you get that stomach sinking feeling x

Thank you @MrsWhites, is my left one particular that bothers me. Maybe I breathed more on that side but it’s just so lumpy and thick. They told me when I had s mammogram 2 years ago that there is some thickening there and it’s just normal breast tissue but in my vulnerable moments I keep thinking what if. My right one I can press it down to my rib just feels so different. Im due on my period in just over a week so I really shouldn’t be checking now! Hope you’re doing well xx

Good morning all. Hope everyone is doing okay xx I think the miserable weather and the tier change announcements have heightened anxiety for lots of people :( thank your everyone for your kind messages. my MRI results didn't really show anything except a mild muscle tear so they suggested doing a bone scan and blood tests so I'm waiting for blood tests now 🤷 doctor reassured me that cancer will have shown up on the MRI scan. I was kind of hoping the scan would show shin splints or something like that so I could be like "oh that's that then". I can't reply properly to people on my phone as I can't see everyone's messages but I will message again soon 🙂

@Goolies honestly it is completely normal, my right is lumpier than my left and I’ve been told it’s just normal beast tissue and that they won’t be exactly the same. I know what you mean about vulnerable moments, I am exactly the same! It’s just our minds playing tricks on us x

@Mvshrln that’s brilliant then that the doctor has said that to you, definitely wouldn’t have said that if he wasn’t certain so you should feel reassured by that and now the extra checks they’re doing are for complete peace of mind. How long will you have to wait for the bone scan? x

Just back from hospital, all ok with baby and no resistance in the blood flow through the cord this week so I’m so happy about that! x

@Goolies I think it’s just so hard to gain perspective when the panic sets in, I’m sure it’s fine. I read somewhere once that breasts feel like the head of cauliflower with lots of raised and dipped bits with lots of little bumpy lumpy bits! If you’ve ever seen a picture of the anatomy of a breast it shows lots of round ducts and glands so it’s probably just one of those that you are feeling x

@Mvshrln that’s great that the doctor has been able to clear that up for you. I hope that brings you some reassurance.

@Lib3rtine brilliant news that your scan was all good this morning! That must be such a relief!

@Lib3rtine fab news about your scan. Hopefully this will help you relax a bit over Xmas.

@Mvshrln that’s brilliant news about MRI results. I know we always want an answer that can easily explain things but bodies don’t work like that and often there’s no obvious explanation for pain which is so bloody frustrating. I also had a look at rumination and that is totally me, so thank you for mentioning it, had never heard of it before but explains lot about my way of thinking!

@Lib3rtine so happy about your scan! Hope you can relax a bit now!

@Mvshrln good news for your scan too! And glad it’s not anything sinister! Although bet you can’t wait for your bloods etc now, I would be the same ha!

I have had a really bad spiral this afternoon! Googled myself into either having leukaemia or lymphoma! convinced the tiny little blood dots I have must be a sign of cancer rather than cherry angioma!

Hi everyone. I hope you don't mind a newbie joining this thread when it's already been going a while but I could really use people to talk to who 'get it' right now.

I've battled with HA on and off for about 10 years now. After lots of CBT it had been under control since 2016 but I began to feel it rising again in the summer. I referred myself back to CBT and it started helping but the last few weeks have really crippled me and I've hit rock bottom today. I have chest pain, palpitations , my throat feels tight and my legs ache and burn with cramp type feelings. I can attribute a lot of stuff to the HA but the leg thing is freaking me out because it's new and I'm convinced my arteries are totally knackered and will trigger a heart attack at any moment. I've spent 2 days crying in my bed, I can't function or do anything and I need to get ready for Christmas. I feel so useless and guilty that my DCs are seeing my like this (which is why I've locked myself away) but then I feel guilty I'm not with them doing Christmas activities.

I called my GP this morning and had a telephone consultation and he's seeing me in person on Thursday but I don't know if I can make it until then. I just feel so broken, hopeless and scared.

@WitchSharkadder that sounds so hard! I can’t imagine feeling like that for 10 years! I really, really hope you get back on track again! Waiting for appointments is awful and I’m sure everyone on here agrees! Sounds daft but have you done anything strenuous lately? I jogged a little bit with DS the other day and I was shocked to realise how unfit I was the next day when my entire body ached! breaks my heart you’ve been in bed in tears, I’ve been there myself the past couple of months and it’s awful! I get how easy it is to do that though and nothing at the minute other than the drs can probably give you reassurance but please don’t feel guilty, it’s so hard to hide the fear you are feeling! I just have some bits to do around the house but I’ll check back in later!

Just thought I would share the health anxiety symptoms from the nhs website! It sounds daft but rereading them helps me realise it’s anxiety not my actual health! I still have bad days like this afternoon however the symptoms are me

“Check if you have health anxiety

You may have health anxiety if you:

constantly worry about your health
frequently check your body for signs of illness, such as lumps, tingling or pain
are always asking people for reassurance that you're not ill
worry that your doctor or medical tests may have missed something
obsessively look at health information on the internet or in the media
avoid anything to do with serious illness, such as medical TV programmes
act as if you were ill (for example, avoiding physical activities)
Anxiety itself can cause symptoms like headaches or a racing heartbeat, and you may mistake these for signs of illness.”

Hey @WitchSharkadder, welcome to the forum. I’m sorry to hear you’re suffering. Whilst I don’t have the answers to resolving this I do totally get it, I’ve been struggling a lot recently and like you getting into the Christmas spirit has felt like a real chore at times. It was just last week I felt paralysed with fear. I’ve heard people say don’t try to fight the thought as the more attention they get the stronger they get but let them come and pass. I have to be honest I haven’t quite mastered that yet!! But I’m trying so so hard. I really hope things ease up for you. We are always here for a chat, this group had been amazing. X

Thank you all so much. I've managed to pull myself together a little and go down and play with the DCs a bit. It's just so bloody terrifying being convinced there's something wrong with your heart.

I hope you're all okay and managing things. As much as I (usually) love Christmas, it does add to the stress and weight of expectation falling on your shoulders doesn't it. And this year has generally been a nightmare for anyone suffering from HA I guess.

Thanks everyone for your messages, I’m so pleased things were ok with little one, it’s now starting to sink in that I’m going to have to give birth soon 😂

@MrsWhites that’s such a good way of describing breast tissue, it really does feel like that I need to remember that as I have wobbles when I’m not feeling mentally strong x

@WitchSharkadder welcome to the group. Really sorry to hear how you’re feeling. I’ve also suffered for years and had it under control on numerous occasions but this time when it reared its head it was the worst flare up I’ve ever had and I felt like I’d hit rock bottom.
The feelings in your legs could also be anxiety related, our minds are incredibly powerful, I’ve learnt the hard way. I hope that you’ll feel better after your appt on Thursday but in the mean time don’t be hard on yourself or feel guilty, you’re going through a tough time but you will get through it. We’re all here for you, this group has done wonders for me, everyone is really friendly and we’ll help and reassure where we can x

If definitely helps to chat to people who understand. My DH is absolutely amazing but has never had anxiety of any kind, he's one of those chilled about everything types so, while he is supportive and gives me all the time I need, he doesn't actually understand how I feel.

@Lib3rtine congratulations on your pregnancy. I hope it all goes well, I'm sure it will and you just need to focus on the squishy baby you will get at the end of it.

@MrsWhites thank you! I’ve never heard of breast tissue being described as that but it does describe my left breast very well!! I may have to keep reading your message when I can feel a wobble coming on.

Morning everyone, welcome to the group @WitchSharkadder I hope you find it as helpful as me.

@tmh88 those symptoms definitely describe me!

@Goolies and @Lib3rtine I hope that helps you then. I’ve been poking and prodding for no reason this morning on mine, I’m trying to remind myself that we aren’t supposed to use finger tips as that will mean we find normal lumpy bits which I always do!

Going to try and not touch them again now, I try and tell myself that I don’t need to check again until next month but I can usually only last a couple of days 🙈

@MrsWhites I am exactly the same!! I’m really trying to wait until January as I’ve done them really thoroughly this month but it’s so hard as it’s the first thing I do when feeling anxious! x

@Lib3rtine @MrsWhites is it normal to make yourself sore from prodding too much or have I just got extra sensitive tissue?

@Goolies completely normal, I’m guilty of this and then I panic that it’s sore even though it’s me that’s caused it to be sore! x

@Lib3rtine thank you, I’m lying bed and I can tell my brain is now scanning my body looking for things to latch on to!! Think that’s my cue to get up and get busy! Crazy isn’t it! Like you said I was prodding about a good few times yesterday but I still question the pain?!

@Goolies honestly I do the exact same thing! My husband actually notices me doing it and has to tell me to stop! I’ve also noticed that the more i do it and the sorer it gets the tissue gets inflamed so feels different so that feeds into the vicious cycle of keep checking! What are we like!! x

@Goolies totally normal, I get stabbing pains and tenderness when I’ve been poking and prodding too. I also get the scanning my body situation, that’s definitely my queue to get up and find something to do.

@Lib3rtine I’m also drawn to checking my boobs as soon as my anxiety kicks in!

It’s so annoying because I can go to bed perfectly happy, not stressing but then I’ll wake up with random anxiety that starts it all off again - it just comes out of nowhere!

I also think a lot depends on the time of month that you are checking, which is why they tell women to check at the same time each month. Not really an option for those of us who check obsessively 🙈

Hello, another Latecomer Lucy here

I’m a longstanding HA sufferer, been wrangling it for six or seven years now. With me it’s often bowel or cardiac stuff but at the moment I have a tiny spot of redness on my gum and I’ve convinced myself it’s some kind of uber-rare oral cancer. (It totally isn’t, it’s either a little injury from eating, a tiny ulcer or a stress response. But I’ve never let reality get in the way of a good made-up story so why start now.)

I firmly believe that health anxiety is a symptom of unprocessed deeper emotional trauma. I had a difficult upbringing and carry a lot of my parents’ irrational fear and I think this feeds in. I was also physically assaulted by a teacher when I was very small and I’m convinced this had an impact too.

I’ve managed, by and large, to stop myself googling symptoms. A tech friend told me once that results for ‘alarming’ illnesses always come up high in Google search results not because they’re the most common or likely, but because more people search for them and click on them. Google likes people to click on stuff so it prioritises things that it thinks people are more likely to click on. This means that Dr Google is a terrible doctor.

The one thing I’ve found reassures me more than anything else is my own diagnosis failure rate! I ask myself, all the dreadful illnesses you’ve diagnosed yourself with over the years — and that’s hundreds, if not thousands — how often was I right? Yep, never. Not once. I’m the worst doctor ever.

That said, it’s been bad this year. I think we’re surrounded by scare messages and have been for months, and this creates a kind of ongoing climate of heightened fear and worry — perfect conditions for health anxiety, in other words.