Health anxiety

[Mvshrln]

Hi all,

I've seen a couple of health anxiety threads on here but they're all quite old/inactive and wondered if there were any more recent ones, or if anyone fancied discussing it via this new thread? It's helpful when someone else knows how you feel.

I really struggle with HA, the thoughts bounce around my head until I fixate on one and worry about it relentlessly. I can see why the anxiety has appeared (friends parent passed away, the covid-19 situation has terrified me, I'm getting older/have life events happening like buying a house, and I also work within the hospice sector). It's helpful to know why but it doesn't help with how to deal with it! I'm currently taking venlafaxine and CBT counselling via videocall but the worry takes up huge chunks of my day.

Nightmare! How is everyone else?

@Lolly12 - Glad you're doing a bit better now. You said that the cancer you researched is often asymptomatic - if you had it, it's unlikely you'd get pain in even one location, never mind four - so it's not going to be that!

Glad all is well with the baby, @Lib3rtine!

Hello,

Can I join?

I have had health anxiety for a couple of years (also have general anxiety,depression and bpd). It used to be just about norovirus but now it's about everything.

I had my 3rd and finally baby almost 4 months ago and having a lot of womens troubles. Going to pluck up the courage to see gp next week but keep convincing myself I have cancer and that's what it will be or a prolapse I'll never be able to fix and I'll be stuck like this uncomfortable my whole life. I'm obsessing over it. Constantly googling, i feel sick with worry and embarrassment.

I am having cbt but so far no good.

Can I join this thread? I have terrible health anxiety which has been really bad recently. Weirdly I’m not at all concerned about covid - with me it’s always cancer fears. Two years ago I had a bad cough that last ages - eventually cleared up with antibiotics plus reflux medicine but I was convinced I had lung cancer. Then last year I had a lot of headaches - I woke up with one nearly every day - so I was convinced I had a brain tumour. This summer a friend was diagnosed with bowel cancer and said one of his symptoms was pain after eating - ever since then I’ve had bad abdominal pain. I’ve been prescribed an IBS medicine and told to increase my antireflux medication and it has helped, then today on Twitter I saw an ad about diarrhoea being a possible cancer symptom and the pain came rushing back! It’s crazy what your brain can do to you. The worst thing is that I’m scared I’ll dismiss cancer symptoms as just signs of my health anxiety and end up dying of it when it could have been treated if caught early enough!

Ideally I’d like a full body CT and MRI once a week but I daresay that wouldn’t be great for my health!

Welcome, @Jj2431 - I can relate to that a lot! My first period after giving birth (not even my first), I ended up going to A&E because convinced that I was hemorrhaging. A few months later I went to the GP about persistent abdominal pain, which in hindsight I think was just to do with being postnatal - but at the time I was convinced it wasn't because it didn't start right after the birth and felt more bowel-ish than gynae. Definitely get it checked out, but also remember that your body has been through a lot and will take time to recover - 4 months is still very early

Cross-posted - welcome to @NaughtipussMaximus too! Health anxiety makes you so suggestible, doesn't it? My recent panics over pancreatic cancer and breast cancer were both triggered by cases I'd read about, but even when you logically know that, it doesn't make it less "real"!

Thanks @PowerslidePanda! It’s so weird.... you’d think after all of my previous “cancers” resolving, I’d know better by now but I still worry that this time it is cancer! The stupidest thing is that I actually had a bad smear this year and had to have a LLETZ procedure to get rid of CIN3 cells but I completely took that in my stride, it barely registered. And hardly any of my family on either side have developed cancer - I think my maternal great grandad’s sister had breast cancer and that’s it in four generations!

Welcome @NaughtipussMaximus so glad you found this forum although I’m sorry you’re in a position where you needed to!

Yeah it’s strange isn’t it how our minds latch onto one thing and once that’s resolved it just magically finds another almost immediately, and as much as we know it’s a pattern that would indicate anxiety more then the illness itself it doesn’t make a difference!?! We still run with it!!

I had a colonoscopy a mammogram a transvaginal ultrasound an urgent smear, all within 2 years I’m not waiting on an endoscopy and have developed paranoia about my breasts!!

It’s tiring!!

Yep, that's exactly my thought process too! Well done for not getting panicked about the LLETZ procedure. You said in your first post about the fear of something not being caught early enough and I think that's a big part of it. I find tests/procedures both terrifying because of what it might lead to, but also reassuring in the sense of, "OK, I suspected there was something wrong, but it's being dealt with - not dismissed"

Hey @Jj2431 4 months postpartum would explain your symptoms for sure. Get it checked out but it won’t be anything they can’t fix or anything sinister. I know it’s so easy for me to say, I live with this type of fear daily but try to step away from the situation and think about what you would say to something that had the same concerns. Sometimes this can help me a bit x

Hey @Sienna9522 yes that makes sense. I think mine was triggered after losing my brother and then having my child. They both happened weeks apart. You’d think knowing the trigger would help overcome it but that’s not the case so far!

Hope you’re feeling ok today xx

@Lolly12 I struggle more on weekends too. I think the lack of routine, too much time lazing about isnt good for me at all. As hard as it is to get up early on the weekdays, especially when I’m stuck in a spiral, it’s good for me as I don’t a choice. On the weekend i try to make plans otherwise I end up feeling depressed just from the sheer overthinking! X

Thanks so much x

I also think weekends are the worse time. In the week I have to get up and get ready for work. At the weekend I can laze round in my pjs and there is usually very little structure to the weekend. Ideally I like to plan something but obviously lately this has not worked x

Hi everyone, hope you’re all ok. Thanks for your kind words, little bub has been kicking away today and making my ribs sore so it’s been a relief
Had my first CBT session this morning and it went really well, it was mostly me offloading everything to her so she could get an insight into my thought process, triggers and vicious cycle I’m in. It felt so good to get it all off my chest so I’m really hopeful that it will help me long term.

@Jj2431 welcome, you’ve definitely come to the right place, we’ll all help as much as we can. I’m sure your problems are related to having a baby, it’s not that long ago at all and I’m sure your GP will reassure you. The constant googling is what I’m bad at and think I’ll really need to work hard to stop doing it. What is it about CBT that doesn’t work for you? I’m praying it works even a little bit for me.

@NaughtipussMaximus welcome! I am exactly the same as you, COVID does not worry me at all, neither do heart attacks, strokes etc, it’s always cancer. I’ve had every cancer going at some point in my mind, my current obsession is breast cancer, absolutely petrified of it, even typing it makes me feel anxious
My fear is the doctors won’t take me seriously as I’ve been that many times, so something will get missed

@Lib3rtine the therapist has me doing an exercise where I write down the situation, my feeling at that time, my automatic thoughts about it, things that confirm my thoughts and things that don't and basically try to challenge my belief, I think it could work if I had the time to write it down but I have 3 children including a demanding 4 month old baby so not really possible to write things down in the moment most of the time so it hasn't helped. I'm going to see if we can explore something else at the next session.

Hi, @Jj2431 and @NaughtipussMaximus. Welcome to the thread, it’s so great that it is attracting more people like us so we can all support each other.

We are going on a Christmas Day out today and I’ve woke up full off nervous tummy pains and a general worried feeling that I can’t work out why I’m feeling. Hope it’s just because I want us to have a nice day but sometimes things like Christmas trigger my anxiety because I start thinking what if I’m not here next Christmas. I do the same for holidays, birthdays etc too! Health anxiety is so exhausting!!

@MrsWhites I could have written your post. I’m exactly the same! Good things can be a trigger too as they remind you of what we could possibly be missing!! It’s crazy isn’t it?! I love reading these posts as I honestly thought it’s just me! No one else could possible think like this.

I’m seeing my niece and nephews today which my ex sis in law only allows once a month so I’m excited but like you have this deep worry about not seeing them grow up and would they look out for my son if something happened to me etc etc.

Hope you have a lovely day and I hope we both manage to quieten the beast! X

Thanks all for the welcome! It’s good to have found my people!

@MrsWhites I’m sure at least part of my tummy pain is Christmas-stress related (and some work-related!). Oddly I usually really look forward to Christmas and I’m always well prepared, this year too. It’s like an exaggerated version of the tummy-twists I used get before a date or an exam - something I was dreading but anticipating at the same time. It’s funny you should say that about worrying about not being here next Xmas - I caught myself thinking that yesterday and then remembered thinking the exact same thing about my ‘brain tumour’ last year! It was a bit of a reality check for me tbh, realising I’m poisoning the good times with different worried every year.

@Goolies @MrsWhites that is me as well! I get so scared thinking about Christmas, holidays etc as think it’s tempting fate that it’ll be my last one.
Hope you both have a nice day.

@Jj2431 that’s what she wants me to do this week inbetween sessions. I can understand how it would be hard with three kids so I’m sure yours will be willing to try something different with you next time

@lib3rtine, I have the exact same fear about my GP assuming it’s health anxiety!

@Goolies exactly! It’s so exhausting that the moment you stop worrying about one thing, your brain latches into another minor thing and inflates it!

@Goolies @Lib3rtine @NaughtipussMaximus thank you all so much for saying you feel the same about happy events, I really feel like I’ve found my people! 😂

We had a lovely day and I think seeing your responses this morning helped me to keep most of my intrusive thoughts at bay.

Hope you all had a good day too!

Reading all your posts makes me feel at home too as I spend all day googling various cancers. Thus far I've convinced myself it's breast, stomach, liver, bowel, pancreas, kidney. And then I go round again. I read many are asymptomatic so then I get convinced my stomach aches and (probably arthritic) hips are mets.
I've eliminated ovarian as I had a transvaginal ultrasound at the gynae last month and ovaries and uterus are fine. I had a smear at the same time and have to go back because they didn't get enough cells (I've always had cervical erosion and taken it in my stride but of course now I've added cervical cancer to the list)
GP thinks I've probably got an irritated gallbladder and possible rumbling appendix - vague aches and gripes in those areas, but nothing that stops me getting on with things. She said scan isn't urgent and no need to go privately but then I worry again it'll be too late.
Then I find I don't want to go for tests because there will be the wait for the results and then the results will be bad and life will be divided between before and after ..(if any of that makes any sense) The gynae said to do various bloods for things like Vit D, iron, thyroid and I'm even scared to go and do those.
Sorry for epic post. I've been reading you all week and taking comfort in not being alone!

@Jj2431 I also have a 4 month old(and 4 other kids). I’ve just started cbt too and I do find it difficult to do the ‘homework’.

@Ethellsmum I'm so worried it won't work for this reason x