I can't do this anymore

[Daisycow667]

I'm sat by myself, a sobbing mess. I've self harmed. I'm so pathetic. I don't want to live anymore. Life is too hard. I'm tired of fighting. I don't want to leave my beautiful children. But I can't stay trapped here anymore. Please someone tell me what to do.

:( you need to be strong for the children..

I feel so awful for bringing them into this mess of my life.

Please call the Samaritans...they can help.

I've tired there's no answer. It feels like everything is telling me to just go. I've tried so many times.

Sitting with you with a hand hold OP

Is it superficial or deep? I know the samaratains are often suggested on here but they can be pretty crap in my experience, are you able to keep yourself safe?

Sorry to hear that op. Offering a handhold x

I wish you were all here in real life. I wish I had someone who cared. I can't do this anymore.

The way you are feeling right at this moment will pass, please don’t do anything rash. Have you any friends or family nearby that you can contact? Thinking of you, your message is so sad to read. Xxx

Oh, OP If you think you are going to harm yourself please call 999. Is there anyone with you? Can you call anyone to come and be with you? Do you have a partner or husband?

Take deep breaths, you can do this, stay nice and calm.

I always hoped it would pass but it always comes back. I just want it to stop. Thank you all for being so kind to me. I don't have anyone.

We might not be there physically but we care, we wouldn't take the time to reply if we didn't! 😊 Do you want to tell us anything we may be able to help with, why you are feeling like this? Please don't face it alone. You are the whole world to your children, you can do this for them I know you can.xx

Tell us what's been going on and maybe we can help

I don't want to leave my beautiful children

Keep saying this to yourself, you know you dont want to, you dont.

You are not well at the moment, its fine, you can & will get better, it takes time, for now take it second by second

I'm a shit mum, a shit wife, a shit employee. Nothing I ever do is good enough. I always do things wrong. I'm stupid. I've let myself go. I'm trying to help my daughter who's showing signs of autism and I'm failing. My beautiful girl. I'm so sorry.

I sound so pathetic. I'm just an embarrassment. I'm so ashamed.

I'm sure you aren't shit. What has happened today to make you feel like this?

Oh OP, you're not pathetic at all. The evenings can be so hard.

Have you tried the Shout text service? You can text Shout to 85258 and a trained crisis person is supposed to chat with you by text. Hopefully they could help you?

Bollocks to.work for a minute, this is about you.

You and only you, you need to be well for your lovely children, you can do this.

Everything in our head seems all 'messy' when we feel overwhelmed and it comes at 100mph, but messy things can slowly be put back in place, and we can put the brakes on, hour by hour, day by day.

Oh op, i feel this way too sometimes, and i feel so alone too, I feel like I'm failing every single damn day as a mother and its just the worst thing ever. You are not alone in this, look at the replies. I promise. X

I know it’s not the same as someone with you in person but there is always someone here to talk to. We care Daisycow

Your children love you more than anything in this world.
Please phone 999 if you think you may hurt yourself.

You aren't shit at anything, OP. The fact you are so upset about things is proof that you aren't. Shit parents don't care they are shit!

Has something happened today to bring it all to a head or has it just been building up? Is the dad on the scene?

Are you working at the moment? I think your first port of call tomorrow morning needs to be to call your GP. You need some help, but that doesn't make you shit or weak. It makes you human. We all need help sometimes

You're not shit OP. You're not.
You wouldn't care so much if you were shit.
Hold on for your daughter. She cares about and loves you.
We care too. Keep talking

Hello OP, we are so sorry to hear you are feeling this way. We know you've had a really hard time of it, and we hope you're taking some comfort and support from all the people on this thread who are here for you.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources. You can also go to the Samaritans website or email them on [email protected]. Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek RL help and support as well.
We also like to remind everyone that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

We are going to move this thread to the Mental Health section shortly.

for you, OP. You're definitely not alone in feeling this way at the moment and we really hope things improve for you soon.