They have given up on me, why shouldn't I give up on myself

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This week I got discharged from mental health services, they feel I am too depressed/negative to engage in therapy. I feel so desperately unhappy. If they say I can't be helped how on earth can I believe in myself?...

Can anyone advise? Do you know any charities that offer therapy?
Should I just pack it in and lie in bed all day waiting to get better

As to not drip feed
I entered into a assessment with pyscologyical services and it's following this that they've discharged me.
I've been diagnosed with a serious and enduring mental illness but I disagree with my diagnosis.
I also have self harm issues which they feel is another barrier to getting help.

Hi OP, sorry to hear you're having a difficult time.

Mental health treatment is evidence based. Assessments are conducted to measure a person's likelihood of responding to treatment. If you don't meet the criteria required for treatment i.e you're able to demonstrate an ability to engage on a meaningful level etc then treatment simply won't work. It isn't in your best interests to start a treatment which isn't going to have a favourable outcome for you.

Do you have any strategies in place to manage your self-harming behaviour? It is stabilising these sorts of behaviours which is likely to improve your chances at treatment.

You could contact MIND mental health charity to be signposted to services in your area.

Are you on any medication? I didn’t feel able to engage with my therapy until I had been on anti-depressants for a while. They helped clear the fog enough for me to be able to actually get something out of the sessions.

Also have you asked about specific therapies which may help the self harm? I had Cognitive Analytical Therapy which my mental health team felt was the best route for helping me reduce my self harm but I have also heard positive things about Dialetical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) and even CBT for helping reduce self harming behaviours.

There are charities which offer therapy but a lot of them are local to specific areas so what’s available might depend on where you are.

Which service were you discharged
From? Did they recommend another?

There isn't anything in place to stop self harming, I'm not really interested in focusing on that as to me it seems very simple. If I was better I wouldn't do it.

I have shown willingness to engage, I really fought for this assessment an example of thus is going to three new venues to take place although it is highly anxiety provoking for me.

I should be starting an SSRI this week but I'm feeling very much like, what's the point.

From the community mental health team - No they specifically said they won't be recommending me for anything.

I think what you're sharing here is quite a simplistic, one dimensional overview of your situation OP

Not quite sure what you mean Lotus

But if you can tackle the self harm and start to find better coping mechanisms you could start to feel better.
Why don’t you agree with their diagnosis? Do you feel it’s based on inaccurate assessment of your situation, wrong information or is it simply you’re scared of the label they’ve put on it?

Community mental health teams have had budgets cut back to the bone but there's a big PR machine trying to deny that and so often patients are made to feel to blame for the severe rationing of services.
Try looking for a "mental health advocacy" service in your area, they might be able to support you in getting treatment.
You may disagree with the diagnosis but are there any "NICE guidelines" for treating the diagnosis they have given you (you can Google that)? if there is this gives you a basis to advocate for treatment for it. Diagnoses can always be reviewed further down the line.
Therapy can cause you to feel worse at points so they will be worried about your self-harming. It's a risk to go into some therapies when you self-harm as a coping mechanism...but there are therapies like DBT where at the start of the programme you work on how to manage self-harm and other harmful coping behaviours.

See if there's a Recovery College near you. They are self referral and run loads of different courses for all types of different MH conditions. And agreeing with your formal diagnosis isn't a prerequisite for attending!

I disagree because it was given to me after one 20min appointment with a doctor (I understand this is a standard session that's not the complaint) that I never saw again during a crisis in which I hallucinated frequently. I don't feel they had a good understanding of me and my difficulties as it's impossible to cover everything after one meeting.

Please don't give up on yourself. Staying in bed waiting get better is not a real option, you know that. But give yourself time
Go see your GP (the one you like best) in the meantime, try and make monthly or more frequent appointments. They will refer you back to counselling eventually; which might help in the in long run.
Samaritans can listen, especially n the early hours.
I don't know what form your self-harming is, but discuss it with the GP, try & keep a record of your better days and times when you were kind/nice to yourself. Or decided you couldn't be bothered to self-harm.
Sharing this is being kind to yourself - it was a brave step.
Take care of yourself

Can you self refer to the step below the CMHT and discuss it with them?

Don't give up on yourself OP.

Not now doesn't mean not ever.

My twopennorth is try the meds. I was an absolute mess till I was medicated (unfortunately took several changes to find the right ones). I have a lifelong mental illness and I was where you are. Medication saved me.

That’s absolutely awful OP - therapy should have been made available to you. Some human support. A sense of connection and community. I’m sorry the system has failed you.

Don’t give up on yourself. Try the meds. Are there any low cost therapy/counselling services near you? Trainee counsellors?

I am in a similar position that they don't think I would benefit from the services they can offer (short courses of CBT is basically all that's available in my area) so I have the choice to not have therapy/counselling or pay for it. I'm not in the financial position to pay for it right now so I am doing what I can. I can't take meds, which complicates things further. So I'm just doing my best to cope with each minute, each hour, each day as it comes. I am trying to face my problems, but in bite size chunks not all at once, and find ways to improve my mood just a little not at a time. A lot of counselling services won't take people who are suicidal, self harming, or using alcohol or drugs which is obviously a large proportion of those suffering with mental health problems, I think they do this intentionally to keep their numbers down and disguise the effects of budget cuts, but it can leave you feeling like it's your fault in some way. I don't do any of those things, but they still won't see me because I have a history of multiple traumas. It's frustrating because they are failing The people who need it the most. What should happen is that they say they cannot treat because of x but can refer you to the service that specialises in x which is what used to happen, but now the other service does not exist

Thanks squirrel
I had a really good relationship with my GP who had advocated strongly for me since I became ill. Unfortunately they went off on leave and I'm not sure if they're coming back. I am under a large surgery so there's lots of other doctors I'm just not sure which is one I can trust I need to bite the bullet I know.

Doing a diary is a really good idea actually especially when everything seems total doom

Long face
Unfortunately not as that service says I am too ill and need to be seen by the community service.

Atrocious
I think I can access private sessions but it's upwards of £30/hr. I'm seriously thinking about it, just worried I'll dip my toe in there and they'll say similar things.

Jodie
I can really relate to that feeling- I also have a trauma history and asked for this to be taken into account in my diagnosis and treatment plan. I was told no at every turn. I don't see what there is to loose in trauma therapy when they're saying I can't cope with anything else. Might as well do it as a last shot then? I dunno. Hope you feel better soon x

They are so under resourced that it seems impossible to get help. I saw psychiatrist last time in February and the next appointment is in next February. Meanwhile two meds have been added me not seeing the doctor. Just more and more meds without any plans how I would get better. I am really annoyed. I take total six psycho meds.

Please don’t give up on yourself. You are bright & kind & strong.
This is just one (very difficult) part of your life. You will meet more helpful people like your GP.

Could you specifically ask a GP to re-refer and ask for the psychologist to review whether you may benefit from a psychological not pharmacological/diagnostic approach right now?

Long
I have found the GP is generally not willing to counteract the secondary mental health team and have an 'what they say goes' approach.

Hello again cake, thank you

Bansku
I'm sorry for that, I can relate. I see the Dr twice a year atm but I realise I'm lucky, although it is hard when they don't listen.

Why not just drop the fight against your diagnosis and engage with therapy for yourself. Commit to this for yourself. Understand before you go into it that you will want to stop at points because it is hard and difficult to confront your own stuff, try and be open-minded about medication, at least in the short term if you need it, be aware that you will blame/hate/want to avoid your therapist at times and that will be ok, let go of anyone else saving you from yourself and decide that you want to get better just for you. Because we're all, when we cut it back to basics, on our own with this stuff in our own heads. Other people can help us but we need to do our own work. Good luck.

If you engage with the therapy and the diagnosis is wrong or inaccurate then won’t that make them revise that?

The diagnosis can change when you meet new psychiatrist. I have had many different diagnosis. They tend to change when I go to new place (hospital or moving to new place). In the end they just tend to give more meds...

I can't engage in therapy- that's what I'm saying I'm being denied therapy.

It's a side issue that I disagree with the diagnosis as the treatments are pretty much the same for what I think I have and what they think.

When they discharged you for being to negative about therapy, did they give any examples, or say what you could change to he able to access therapy?