Sorry probably going to be a long one. I just feel so so down I don't know what to do, I don't want to be alive but I wouldn't go through with anything as I'm too scared and have a child I love to bits.
Just stuck in such a rut. I moved far away to come to uni and I hate it. I've never felt so depressed and lonely, I go weeks without having a proper conversation with an adult and I can't cope with it anymore.
I feel so trapped, I can't move because if I dropped out I would be on UC which would be a fair bit less than what I get now. I wouldn't be able to get a place as houses in my hometown are expensive and won't rent to people on benefits. I'm soon to be stuck to another years contract here which is hours away from anyone I know (not that I have many friends but it's still soemthing knowing people), I have no family support so I'm completely alone. I've been on/off seeing someone who's an alcoholic and I know it's not right at all but putting up with his crap is easier than being suicidal from loneliness.
I just really don't know what to do. On top of it all I feel so guilty for my daughter having to watch me cry and be depressed all the time but I can't stop. I wake up crying and go to sleep crying and can't motivate myself to do anything. The thought of having another 2 years like this is terrifying me and I don't know If I can make it!
The only good thing is that I'm not really struggling financially but that's what's stopping me doing anything. I have a nice place and get a fair amount of financial help but if I left here I would struggle and quote frankly be without a place to live.
Would really appretiate some advice right now :(