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Leaning towards suicide

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Lalallals248 · 31/05/2019 10:14

Im feeling overwhelmed and I don’t know what to do. Sorry to bore, but I’m going to have to give a bit of back story. I’m a stay at home mum to two children, but I’m also a freelance writer and a full time student with the Open University. All of that work is done in the evenings when my husband gets home. It’s like we are on a shift rota; he comes home and does the bed time routine, and I work my job and go to bed in the early hours of the morning.
My problem, I think, is a mix of always having had depressed tendencies, and now this constant stress. I’ve been juggling it okay so far but now I’m feeling so guilty as a mother. In the day time I’m constantly worrying about assignments and deadlines and the house being in perfect order because I’m a stay at home Mum and I’m supposed to keep it pristine, and the anxiety from all of that, I think, is stopping me from interacting with my kids. I don’t know what to do with them to engage them. My four year old is naughty and has an attitude but I’m so tired and stressed that it’s 100% boredom caused by my failings.
I feel like I should give up uni and focus on the kids but I don’t want to. I’ve come so far now and to give up would devastate me. But then I feel guilty, because I’m a mum, and it isn’t about me anymore - it’s about the kids, and if doing that would help them, then that’s what I should do. But I’m not a good mum because when I think of giving up and focusing on them I feel sad and resentful. All these feelings of failure, of pressure, of vanity and of guilt have been making me feel trapped and suicidal for a while, but I’ve always been sure I’ve been okay. Slowly, though, I’m starting to act on it. It started as talking paracetamol for a headache and taking three instead of two to see what would happen, and then taking higher dose more times a day than recommended. I’m scared. I’m obviously sane enough to realise something’s wrong and to not take more, but this behaviour is making me think I’m going to do it. I’ve always had the feelings I guess that I’d be better off gone, but now I seem to be slowly edging towards actually doing it and I don’t want to do. It isn’t enough to warrant medical attention obviously but I don’t know how to stop it, or if I even want to.

JoMumsnet · 31/05/2019 10:47

Hello Lalallals248,

We're really sorry to hear you're feeling this way.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources. You can also go to the Samaritans website, or email them on [email protected], or call them, free, any time, on 116 123.

We'd also like to point you in the direction of the Mind website - they have lots of advice on parenting while struggling with mental health issues as well as tips for everyday living. Please do take a look at the links.

Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you'll be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek real life help and support as well.

We also like to remind everyone that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

OP, we really hope things start feeling less difficult for you soon. Sending good wishes. Flowers

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