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Original poster

Can't cope with screaming & unsettled 7 week old...

36 replies

wilkie50 · 01/03/2007 18:57

He just won't settle. He cries constantly when he's awake and I mean, constantly.

I have tried colief as the HV suggested colic. It just gave him diahorrea and didn't stop him crying. He doesn't appear to have colic anyway IMO.

Took him to a cranial osteopath. Was a different child for 2 days which was wonderful - he was calm and settled and now we are back to square one. I do have another appointment tomorrow but I feel so disheartened, I thought we had cracked it.

I feel so down. Have seen my dr and am on anti depressants (low dose) as I just am at the absolute end of my tether.

This wasn't what I expected when we decided to have a baby.

Please don't say 'Babies cry...' - I know they do but this is something else. Several friends and family have commented how difficult he is so I know it 's not just me not coping.

Will he grow out of it???

OP posts:
massagemum · 01/03/2007 19:03

Sometimes when babies have a difficult transition into the big bad world it can take a long time for them to settle. Birth can be hugely stressful for babies especially if there were problems.

Is he in a good feeding routine??

anonymiss · 02/03/2007 09:49

To Wilkie: I have a DD aged 3 months and have recently been through EXACTLY what you describe. Like you, I ended up on ADs. I wanted to send you some reassurance; it DOES get better. KEEP BUGGERING ON, it will pass. One day, in despair and tears, I posted on the parenting thread under "Don't like parenthood/motherhood" and I received a lot of support, advice and comfort. Sorry I'm not technically adept enough to provide a link, but you may find it through the search facility and find it helpful. Best wishes, let me know how you get on XX

cupcakesgalore · 02/03/2007 09:54

hi, i'm sure he will grow out of it. Some just seem less easy to settle than others, don't they. So hard for you though. Have you got anyone who can at least give you a break? Also, I did read that Infacol have produced a new one with probiotic that is supposed to cut down crying assoc. with colic. I'd be auprised if it was that that gave him diarrohea. Might be worth a try. Best of luck.

emmatomATO · 02/03/2007 09:55

Yes, he will grow out of it. Please hang on in there. Many have been through this. We know how hard a constantly crying baby can be. And it can seem never ending, but it won't always be like this.

If it all gets really too much and you're on your own, make sure your baby is safe in his cot and just leave the room for a bit, even go to the end of the garden for 2 minutes.

Take a deep breath, remind yourself you're not the first to go through this, that it will get better and go back to him.

Get as much help as you can from your doc, health visitor, family etc.

It will get better.

clairemow · 02/03/2007 09:56

wilkie, I remember EXACTLY this with DS2 last November. He wouldn't go down for a nap anywhere except his car seat, and I ended up with him permanently attached to my shoulder/boob, which was difficult with a 2.3 year old toddler as well to think of (he got all quiet and depressed too, but that's a different story).

Has he been like this since birth, or has it just come on recently?

Keep trying the osteopath if it seems to work. Sometimes it can take a few visits. Have you also tried infacol - a squirt before a feed, which helps them bring up wind?

Also try to get out of the house every day, take him for a walk in the buggy/sling, you might find he settles more easily there, and everything seems better after some fresh air.

In answer to your last question, yes he will grow out of it. I found that 12 weeks was a magic point and suddenly he could sleep in the day, I could get a rest, and DS1 could get some time with me.

Thinking of you. Xxx

chacha3 · 02/03/2007 09:58

ah hun i sympathise with you its very hard going listening to your baby crying constantly! my oldest one had terrible colic when she was a baby! i used infacol! found that pretty good!

Original poster
wilkie50 · 02/03/2007 12:57

He is on SMA Gold.

He always seems in pain but I really don't think it is colic. I have heard this milk is hard to digest and loads of people have suggested switching to Aptamil.

He's no just whinging - he seems to be in pain IMO.

OP posts:
emmatomATO · 02/03/2007 13:02

Try switching then - try anything that makes you feel better. the Infacol that lots of people are mentioning is really very good too.

Have you tried gently stroking his tum or lying him on his tum on your lap as you stroke his back? Do any of these things make it better?

clairemow · 02/03/2007 13:28

wilkie, I've heard that about SMA as well, and my friend's baby was quite sick on it a lot, but fine once she changed. My DS (6 months) is on Aptamil, and it's been fine. I've been told that it's the best formula nutritionally, but don't know if that's true. It's worth a try.

dejags · 02/03/2007 13:35

Ditch the SMA. It's hideous stuff IMO - my DS was exactly like this and was totally transformed after we changed formula.

It's been a long time since DS1 was a baby but I have heard that Hipp Organic is a good formula?

clairemow · 02/03/2007 13:37

I used hipp organic with DS1 after stopping bf, and it was always fine.

castlesintheair · 02/03/2007 13:48

wilkie, have you had your baby checked for silent reflux? DD1 had this - she used to scream for 7/8 hours continuously and did not throw up. We got her on meds (gaviscon & ranitadine) and she transformed into a happy baby literally overnight. She was only about 6 weeks at the time so long before the 3 months "they'll grow out of it period". If your LO does have reflux it's not necessarily going to improve on it's own by around 3 months. Good luck, you have my sympathy!

Also re formula, a m/w friend said SMA seems to make young babies sick, she said Cow & Gate is better. I've got a 13 week old (who also has gastric reflux) and I give her a bottle of this a day and she seems fine with it, though she's also on meds.

Original poster
wilkie50 · 02/03/2007 17:34

Thanks for all of the advice. Have tried tummy massage but doesn't do anything.

Have been to Asda and bought some Aptamil to try. His tummy is just always gurgling, he's sick, windy, unsettled and irritable. Hoping that Aptamil will make a difference.

I know having a new baby is hard but when he is happy it is so different and I love every second of it.

OP posts:
pollyblue · 02/03/2007 19:12

Just wanted to add a quick note - my daughter is 6 weeks old and we started her on Aptamil, my cousin used it for her daughter last year and recommended it. Anyhoo, we found it made her horribly windy (bottom end!) and when i mentioned it to my health visitor she said the formula has been recently changed and now includes fibre. I've been using Hipp Organic for the past couple of weeks and get on very well with that.

robbosmum · 02/03/2007 19:36

Darling, feel so sad for you, you are doing a marvellous job.
My lo was also exactly like this and until its over (about 41/2 mths for me)you really think the world is going to end. Take one day at a time, i too tried colief, found infacol was better - but you will know best. I found it so hard trying to cope all day and all night,
it may not feel like it but IT WILL COME TO AN END, I PROMISE......

All the best.

robbosmum · 02/03/2007 19:38

Sorry one last thing, my lo seemed to settle best in the pram , walked for miles despite many stitches, must have looked like someone who needed care in the community (no offence meant)

fizzylemonade · 02/03/2007 21:52

Wilkie, it is so hard when your wee one cries and everyone acts like it should be the happiest time in the world and when it isn't it makes you feel like there is something wrong with you emotionally and physically when your baby just cries and cries.

Like other posters I tried BF and then that didn't work for several reasons so tried different formulas (Aptimil worked for us too) but both my sons also had reflux both productive where they chucked and silent reflux where they don't. DS2 went on pharmacy only formula and is a changed man but it took time.

With my first son I did the whole walking around, jiggling, etc etc then watched The Baby Whisperer and took her advice and then just sat in a chair in a darkened room and just gently patted his bottom (not his back as that made him chuck with the reflux) I also clock watched so I could tell exactly how long he cried for and how long the breaks were in between, and I found that helped.

The walks with the pram were good too, change of scene and he seemed to like it, propped up.

Go back to your GP if things aren't working, and post here for support.

trixymalixy · 02/03/2007 23:51

Just popped in to give a big hug as don't have much advice to give as I'm new to this baby business too.

One thing which does seem to settle my DS is the noise from the dishwasher, extractor fan,bath running etc.

movingmadness · 02/03/2007 23:59

My DD seemed to scream constantly at first.... as Trixy says, the hairdryer used to calm her, at least then I could try to make myself look decent !! Don't have any time now she's up and mobile !!!
We switched from SMA to Cow & Gate and fingers crossed things have been much better since then. We tried Infacol for a little while, but IMO it made things with wind worse.

Really need to go to bed now ready for 4am feed !! (can't wait for her to start sleeping through - 7mths and counting....)
Good luck and it DOES get better.

Astrophe · 03/03/2007 00:33

try this CD - I started a thread on it yesterday to share the benefits! You have to order from Australia, we got our 2nd hand on ebay.com.au for about £7

Original poster
wilkie50 · 03/03/2007 09:46

Thanks so much for messages - you are all so lovely.

Started him on Aptamil last night - he did the biggest poo (sorry if TMI) this morning which is a rareity on SMA so am hoping that once the SMA is completely out of his system (how long should this take BTW?) things may improve. Fingers crossed.

It does make you feel like your world is going to end when the incessantly scream - you have this beautiful, healthy, much wanted baby and then it turns into a nightmare and you feel so guilty complaining about it as there are so many people out there who aren't as fortunate to have a baby.

I am also trying keeping him in his sleepsuits until he is settled as his elasticated bands on his trousers seem to make his tummy more uncomfortable.

OP posts:
yomellamoHelly · 03/03/2007 09:56

Hope the changes you've made work for you.

Is there anyway you can get someone else to look after your ds for a short while?
Ds1 was pretty much the same and I would take him to the creche at out local gym for an hour 3 times a week. It was the only time out I got and was a godsend. Things don't seem nearly as desperate once you've had a breather.

skirmish · 03/03/2007 10:03

wilkie...there is a cd on ebay called 'white noise' which seems to settle a lot of babies...i find that often my ds stops crying when i have the hairdryer/hoover on. it's not expensive either

white noise is supposed to sooth (something to do with all the sounds they hear in the womb)

matildax · 03/03/2007 10:31

hello all, my ds is on sma gold is it known for causing problems???? can anyone suggest a replacement formula? my hv told me to try sma white as he is a very hungry baby, and seems to go through loads of bottles!! i hope things are better for you now wilkie, anyway any advice would be gratfully received!! x x

gingernutlover · 04/03/2007 19:03

hi dd was exactly like this until about 8 weeks when we changed her bottle to dr brown anti colic ones - fandabbydozi! and she was on cow and gate too, but since very early as I did mixed feeding. When i gave up bf she did get constipated so watch out for that if you change milks