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Original poster

Please help. Where can we get help for our son.

84 replies

ihatethecold · 15/08/2016 18:10

My son is currently talking to objects in the house like they are real.
He thinks his step mum has had a baby and he will talk to it in the pushchair.
(She is due this week but she clearly hasn't given birth yet)
He lives with her and his dad.
He was a risk suicide until recently and was hospitalised 4 times due to attempts on his life.
He is now on quitiapin and Duloxitine to help stablelise him.
He has a bad cannabis habit that is getting worse.
I also think he's using amphetamine type drugs because he hasn't slept since Friday night.
He was discharged from the crisis team about 6 weeks ago and he only has the GP to help him.
His step mum took him today because of the hallucinations and they said it's not a psychotic episode and to take one of his prescription medications and to sleep.
We don't know where to turn anymore.
We called the crisis team and they said to call the police!

OP posts:
Original poster
ihatethecold · 16/08/2016 08:59

His dad is going to take him to the impatient mental health place this morning.
My son agrees he needs help, he will go voluntarily. i only hope they can help.
if not he will go through A+E

Getting the police involved isn't going to happen.

His GP gave him a months worth of Meds in one go (120 pills) which i believe is negligent because of his history
My son has used them up so cant sleep and is using cannabis to help with the withdrawal effects, this has induced psychosis.

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dangermouseisace · 16/08/2016 09:28

the police don't have to charge him with anything.

Many people are brought into MH inpatient units by the police- they haven't committed a crime, they just have the 'beef' to get people there under section 136 of the MH act.

Original poster
ihatethecold · 16/08/2016 09:51

Thanks Dangermouse,I know this, I'm married to a PO.

My son was hallucinating that the police were in his back garden last night with his ex girlfriend.
If we can keep the police out of it and take him voluntarily

it will keep things calmer.

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Justdontaskhowiam · 16/08/2016 09:52

The police can only use s136 from a public place, not from their house.

heknowsmysinsheseesmysoul · 16/08/2016 20:17

Echoing PP - The Police power of sec 136 only applies in a public place. If he's violent or destroying property he could be arrested on suspicion of a criminal offence and then Police may request MH input.

I'd suggest A and E if you can get him there. And speak to the crisis team again, they may have misinterpreted it as an immediate risk of violence/suicide where the response will be to suggest Police as a crisis team can't respond quick enough.

And if this is his first episode of psychotic symptoms regardless of drug use (and in this situation first episode means not previously given medication for a psychotic episode) , he should be referred to an early intervention in psychosis service if there is one in your area.

dangermouseisace · 16/08/2016 22:10

Sorry I didn't realise about 136…in hospital there were people brought in who said they were on that who had come from private homes (but not theirs!) But you can't always trust what people say etc...

Original poster
ihatethecold · 17/08/2016 06:55

His dad took him back to the GP yesterday.
He confessed to using a months worth of tablets much sooner than he should
He ran out of his meds (deloxatine and quitiapin) over a week ago.
His GP said he's not surprised he is hallucinating.
The CMHT are seeing him today.
Yesterday was the 5 day he hadn't slept or eaten.

Last night he thought his duvet was called Darren and was from Wisconsin!
He's also talking in accents.

I'm really hoping the CMHT will be able to assist and may recommend inpatient treatment.

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Emochild · 17/08/2016 07:06

I really hope he manages to get some proper help

Is his dad aware though that if he continues to live at his house, SS will take an interest in the new baby?

I can absolutely see he is stuck between a rock and a hard place but there is only so much he can do

Original poster
ihatethecold · 17/08/2016 10:58

s his dad aware though that if he continues to live at his house, SS will take an interest in the new baby?

Yes. We are all aware.

His dad called the police last night. They took him to hospital where he was talking to everyone in a Jamaican accent.
I called the CDU this morning. They said he was sleeping and would be seen by the crisis team.
Now I've been told he's been discharged.
He still has a CMHT appointment this afternoon.
I just don't understand why they are not sectioning him?

I'm feeling anxious today. 😔
Like this is never going to end.

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Willberry · 20/08/2016 22:51

Hi,

You're son sounds just like my husband when he is experiencing an acute psychotic episode. Bare in mind he can go days without sleeping or eating when very unwell without the use of any drugs! I hope you have managed to get some help for him since your last post. If this is something new then it definately sounds like he needs support from an early intervention in psychosis team. These have been an amazing support to both my husand and myself and managed to get him stable for long periods of time. Just recovering from a bad episode but it had breen 2 years before that. I would really push for this. When my husband was at crisis point the first time it was very difficult to get help for him. There is a point where someone is serously unwell but not considered to be a risk to themselves or others therefore can't be sectioned. I found crisis team wouldn't get involved because he didn't realise he was unwell and refused to see them. Police couldn't do anything as he wasn't considered a risk to himself or others (despite them removing me from the property as yhey felt I was unsafe there Confused) eventually what worked was getting the out of hours GP via 111 who assessed him with police pressance to ensure he allowed assesment under mental health act. She then got crisis team/home treatment team involved and 4-6weeks in they then refered to early intervention in psychosis team. He only had a few days inpatient stay under section for assessment after a suicide attempt and was then discharged back into community. DH also took too much medication, not in an attempt to harm himself, but in an attempt to stop the distressing symptoms early on. The psychiatrist prescribed a short spell of diazepam as sedation whilst his symptoms settled which stopped him feeling the need to take so much of his antipsychotic meds.

Another thing is that DH hides his symptoms well on assessment, his recent episode was on holiday where I got an emergency assessment who found no evidence of psychosis, got him home to his own team who immediately agreed he was seriously unwell. This may be another reason you are struggling to access services. It took us years and a really horrfic crisis before DH was recognised as suffering psychosis. My advice keep fighting for MH input and push for early intervention in psychosis team.

Its a really tough place for all of you to be right now, but we have found once we got the right team involved the difference has been amazing. Feel free toPM me if you need a chat.

Original poster
ihatethecold · 21/08/2016 06:59

Thank you wilbury.
He is having treatment again from the home treatment team again.
What has emerged is my ds wasn't sleeping so took a months worth of meds over 2 weeks and didn't tell anyone.
He then ran out and started hallucinating because he was suddenly withdrawing.
His quitapin has been increased to help him sleep.
He has stopped hallucinating and says he's feeling better.
I do have to question why the GP gave someone who was suicidal 2 months ago a months worth of meds in 1 go.

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Original poster
ihatethecold · 21/08/2016 07:05

I must admit I'm feeling quite low this morning.
Even though he has improved.
I feel like I hold it together and keep plodding on and dealing with each crisis then end up with a low day.
I really try to be kind to myself on these days and do things for myself.
Nothing much, having a cry whilst I walk the dogs.
Sitting in the sunshine.
Feel a bit lost today. 😔

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Devilishpyjamas · 21/08/2016 07:09

I'm not surprised - it sounds horrific. I cannot understand why MH services have been allowed to get so bad in this country. Do you have anyone in RL you can talk to?

Maki79 · 21/08/2016 07:12

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the posters request.

Original poster
ihatethecold · 21/08/2016 07:18

My friends and dh have been amazingly supportive.
I am very lucky to have that support but no one knows how hard this is.
I know how selfish people with MH issues can be and once they are over the crisis they really have no idea of the effect of those around them.
But I will be forever grateful to my friends for listening to me.
My work have also been very kind and allow me to take time off when problems arise.

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Devilishpyjamas · 21/08/2016 07:31

I'm glad you have RL support. I wish I had a magic wand but I know services are so stretched that there is no easy answer & even the dedicated professionals often cannot help.

I agree with you that going via the police is not helpful.

I hope you can get something sorted long term (especially with a baby soon being added to the mix). Could children's services deliver a kick up the arse there to their fellow professionals (they seem to have more teeth than adults - or would their remit just extend to removing him from his home?)

It sounds terribly difficult. :(

Original poster
ihatethecold · 21/08/2016 07:58

My sons children's social worker isn't great.
I know the work load is immense but
She is supposed to be the key worker for my son and his ex also.
The ex has just gone to ground. She isn't seeing her children, not engaging with any services and the SW justs seems to accept it.

The whole situation is very frustrating.

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erinaceus · 21/08/2016 08:37

ihatethecold This might sound like a bananas suggestion, but have you had a carers assessment? As your DS's carer, you are entitled to request such an assessment. This is a route towards care for you in your role as carer for your DS. Depending on how stretched resources are in your area, you may or may not be assigned someone to talk to, given help accessing financial support, and so on. I have never done this so I have no idea whether it helps or not. Services in my area are relatively progressive, but terribly, terribly overstretched and I remember being in a somewhat similar situation to your son although perhaps less dangerous as my DH and I do not have DC. My DH suffered a great deal in the middle of it all, but he turned down all suggestions of getting help for himself, which, in my opinion did not help either of us.

I feel for you. It sounds horrific and lonely.

Original poster
ihatethecold · 21/08/2016 09:06

Thanks.
My ds doesn't live with me. He's at his dad's and step mums.

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erinaceus · 21/08/2016 09:12

That does not make you not his carer. You remain entitled to a carers' assessment. (I know, I know.)

Original poster
ihatethecold · 21/08/2016 12:08

I see, I didn't realise that.
Tbh I'm ok financially and can manage without any extra.
I'd rather it went to someone who really needs it.
I still work 30 hours a week so I've got a wage.

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gamerchick · 21/08/2016 12:20

I just don't understand why they are not sectioning him

They're not sectioning him because he has family and people that care to discharge him. The question 'can he be discharged into your care' is loaded. It took me a while and an argument with the crisis team to work it out when she told me by accident.

He won't get help until he's a danger to others if he has a home to go to and people to look after him. It's tough I know.

Original poster
ihatethecold · 21/08/2016 12:24

i get that Gamerchick.
he has stopped hallucinating now so its not so urgent anymore and i'm hoping the crisis team visits will get him back on track.

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erinaceus · 21/08/2016 13:04

ihatethecold Do you have emotional support for you? Therapist, counsellor, friend?

Yes gamerchick my parents figured that one out at some stage. I was too out of it to be sectioned but if I had not gone along with what was going on then I would have been. It was written in my discharge letter from the general hospital to the psych ward that I was transferred under section which was not what happened. I did complain about the error in my letter, once I was compis mentis enough to realise that I was not on a section and never had been, which took a little while.

As I understand it now, it is rare for an adult to do this for their adult child, but it is what it took. This was more than a decade ago, so I dread to think what would happen today. For all the shit that I lived through, at least I lived.

Original poster
ihatethecold · 21/08/2016 17:51

I do thanks.
The support I've received from my dh has really helped.

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