I'm sat here staring at this screen, I don't know what to type, I can hear the rain pouring down outside and all I want to do is cry. Today, a year ago, was the last time I saw my lovely kind Dad alive - he was dead the following morning - he died of a heart attack. I still can't come to terms with his death. I still can't believe I won't see him again and I can't believe a year has gone by already. I feel so lonely and so very sad. I just wish I could be with him now. God this is awful.