hi tyedye,sorry to hear ur still in this situation.i have been in similar myself but i am lucky where i live we have a special centre for victims of domestic abuse,where they do 1-1 and couple councelling,courses for abusive men etc etc so even though i dont have any family around i was able to get plenty of support.
to be honest,i dont think relate will be any good to you as you sound like youve made up ur mind this relationship is over,and u just need support to help get rid of him.
organisations that are there to help women in abusive relationships will help in any abusive relationship-even if theres no actual violence.
i didnt find the strength to finally get rid of my xh untill the woman i was seeing at the domestic abuse project said she was going to have to contact social services if he wasnt gone within a month as he was being emotionally abusive to my children as well.that was the final push i needed to tell him to get out and stay out and never come back.and once he realised i was serious,he never did.
stay strong x