Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Original poster

Feel like a failure taking my meds

61 replies

PiperIsOrange · 05/10/2014 20:38

I know it will take time, but I feel like a total failure that I can't be happy without resorting to taking tablets.

Due to no motivation on looking after myself, including not eating and not sleeping ect, DH makes sure I take my meds every day or I would forget.

OP posts:
MyGastIsFlabbered · 05/10/2014 20:45

If you were diabetic would you feel bad taking insulin every day?
Honestly, it's the same thing, you are unwell & this medicine is making you better.

I am a long term AD taker & there are times I wish I didn't have to take them, but I honestly can't function without them.

Hope you feel better soon.

Wolfiefan · 05/10/2014 20:48

I can understand feeling rubbish about taking them but I think it is part of the illness.
You don't need pills to make you happy. You do need them to allow you to get well.

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 05/10/2014 20:56

Thank you Thanks

Just feel really low, I struggling to cope.

OP posts:
Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 07/10/2014 16:57

god I wish this mood would go. Just want to feel normal now

OP posts:
MyGastIsFlabbered · 07/10/2014 18:45

Sorry meant to reply to your last post but I got distracted.

It sucks doesn't it? But if you don't take your meds then it won't get better.

Sorry, I can't think of anything useful to say right now, will be back when my brain is feeling more helpful.

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 07/10/2014 21:05

No worries, we are all struggling on this board.

I have set an alarm to take the meds, today I felt like sending this text to DH.

I'm leaving you and the kids, I feel like you would be much better of then me taking up space in your life.
You deserve a happy wife and the kids needs a mother who is not an anxious and unhappy all the time.
I don't bring nothing but grief into you all and you should go out and find some else.

OP posts:
typoqueen · 07/10/2014 21:37

Believe me, the text you wanted to send I wanted to send so many times, until I found the right medication for me, we can not help when our brains decide to go on the blink, like Mygast said, if you and an illness like diabetes you would be happy to be taking meds to make you feel better, anti depressants are exactly they same, they help us, make us feel better once you are on the right dose and the right type, depression and anxiety is an illness, a lot of how you think you are making your family feel is not how they actually feel, we take in on ourselves to make everyone one else happy, we need to take a small step back for ourselves and give the meds time, you have to stick with the meds it does not make you a failure if that were the case believe me there would be millions of us failing xx

windchimes23 · 08/10/2014 10:57

I could be you OP. I feel like such a failure as a wife, mother and everything else.

I have agreed to antipsychotics as well as ADs, my brain just isn't working right now. I told my psychiatrist that I just wanted to walk away and let them have a happy life.

I have been told that it is my negative thoughts, not theirs. I am moving on slowly day by day. I am needed, as a wife, a mum and a friend. I just have to work my way out of the fog.

Please look after yourself, you are not a failure for accepting meds, quite the opposite really. You have made a decision to deal with your illness and that is commendable. You will get through, I keep promising myself that and although it's rubbish ATM I have to keep saying it and looking to tomorrow x

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 08/10/2014 15:49

Thank you for your kindness.

I will give these tablets another week or so, if I still feel like this I was ask the doctor to up the dose.

Don't feel so bad now for taking the tablets, at least I am sleeping more.

OP posts:
MorrisZapp · 08/10/2014 15:54

Have you just started on them? What are you taking? ADs changed everything for me, it was hideous at the time but looking back they kicked in quite quickly (ie in a few weeks). I'm still on the buggers but so what, I'm happy and that's all that matters.

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 08/10/2014 18:59

I am on 50mg of sertraline. I been taking them for just over a week.

OP posts:
MrsMinton · 08/10/2014 19:09

Piper it'll take a little longer to feel better. You aren't a failure lovely. You have asked for help and that's massive. It took me years to do it. I've been on my ADs about ten weeks now. I've upped my dose last week and am a bit tearful and wobbly again but I know it'll be ok. It's a helping hand to be yourself.

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 09/10/2014 09:37

Thanks for all your help.

OP posts:
MorrisZapp · 09/10/2014 09:56

Hello, I started on same drug and same dose. For me, I got worse before I got better, this is common. But I absolutely did get better. With this type of drug (ssri) the effects do usually take a few weeks to kick in.

I think the doc said full benefits couldn't be measured until about six months, but I was better much faster than that.

Hang in there. If these pills don't work, there's loads more to try. You can and will be normal and happy again, this is just a short time in your life xx

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 10/10/2014 00:17

Can't sleep tonight, got a HR meeting in work tomorrow and dreading it.

OP posts:
MrsMinton · 10/10/2014 00:19

Why are they meeting with you Piper?

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 10/10/2014 00:20

I had a major op on my knee mid July and still not fit for work, got to see my consultant again as my knee is still swollen and clicking plus gives way.

OP posts:
MrsMinton · 10/10/2014 00:23

That must have been stressful too. Can you take someone with you for support?

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 10/10/2014 00:28

I don't think I will be allowed, DH is driving me and waiting in the car.

My boss is lovely, but I'm just scared of how the meeting will go. I don't know what to expect as this is the first time ever in the 11 year I have worked there.

OP posts:
MrsMinton · 10/10/2014 00:33

It should just be a chat about where you are at physically and where you go from here. They might suggest a plan of action or an occupational therapy review.

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 10/10/2014 00:42

I hope so.

OP posts:
lucy101 · 10/10/2014 00:47

I think it's incredibly common to feel like this about taking the AD's, it's another depressive thought. I am taking 50mg of Sertraline too... and sometimes I question taking them/feel a failure but the other day I remembered just how ill I was (PND) when I started on them again and it shocked and scared me actually that I could have been in such a bad place. However with the AD's by 5 weeks I felt completely better, a different person, and could be the person my DC needed. My (amazing) GP has now suggested I stay on them long term as Sertraline seems to suit me so well and I think he's right. It's only been a week so I think you need to be try to be gentle with yourself.

Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 10/10/2014 10:51

1/2 hour to my meeting, good my heart is racing and I feel sick.

OP posts:
Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 10/10/2014 12:33

Meeting went ok, back to work Monday :(

OP posts:
Original poster
PiperIsOrange · 10/10/2014 12:33

Meeting went ok, back to work Monday :(

OP posts: