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Original poster

health anxiety

999 replies

hopeliss · 14/10/2013 11:18

has anybody ever found a cure for health anxiety. it has plagued my life for 7 years and don't see an end to it. awful day today.
ps never been on mumsnet before. sorry if this is the wrong place to raise this.

OP posts:
ballofworry · 25/03/2015 13:09

Thanks I've been out to councillor today but feel rough again now ...

How are you

crabapple34 · 25/03/2015 15:49

I'm feeling a bit better this afternoon, I hope it lasts. How was the counseling?

buildmeabuttercup · 25/03/2015 17:43

Has anyone been on the no more panic website? The forum on there is great and it was the kickstart i needed to get me through this.

ballofworry · 25/03/2015 18:08

Feeling awful today , I have tried that site maybe should try again , went to councillor today , was ok although I think I may have said to much not sure she gets what I mean , I do sound nuts to others who don't suffer with health anxiety I'm sure ...

buildmeabuttercup · 26/03/2015 08:11

Everyone thought I was nuts. That I was exaggerating, being a drama queen, taking the piss and doing it on purpose. It does sound mad when you write it down but its so real, nobody will ever truly understand unless they've been through it. I wouldn't wish it on anyone, I'm so greatful to have got through the worst of it. And I know you will too Flowers

ballofworry · 26/03/2015 16:56

Thanks buildme that's so kind , & true , it's an illness underestimated as you have no obvious symptoms ...
Hope you continue to beat it .. What have you done to help you ? I'll try anything if it helps even just a bit x

buildmeabuttercup · 27/03/2015 14:33

I took anti depressants and use distraction mainly. Today I am having a hideous day, totally convinced I have a thigh DVT, will never believed by anyone, cant do anything until monday and really I'm just waiting for to kill me. Had a panic attack already today, just forgot how bad this is at its worst. Sad

buildmeabuttercup · 27/03/2015 14:43

The problem is people say trust your instints but with health anxiety you can't, your instincts are all wrong, you dont know wether there's something wrong or its the anxiety. I'm in such a horrible place today.

ballofworry · 28/03/2015 08:35

Awe build sorry you had a bad day yesterday , how are you feeling today ? Hope bit better today

I was bad yesterday fluy thing and my IBS was bad to .. But so far feel bit better today Hmm
Going to try get out today change of scenirie I find that helps a bit and keeps me away from Dr G

Hope we all have a better day today [ flowers]

ballofworry · 28/03/2015 08:36
Flowers
crabapple34 · 29/03/2015 20:43

Hello all.

Build Dvt is something I often panic about. Its that horrible fear of something inside you that is going to kill, and yes I known that feeling of just waiting to die well.

Since I last posted I opened up to my partner about how I've been feeling for the past few months. He had no idea as I find it really hard to talk about stuff like that. I've felt a lot better since, and I feel like I can at least try and move forward and help myself. I've still been feeling anxious and down, but now I know I can talk to someone about it.

I hope everyone is feeling OK today.

crabapple34 · 29/03/2015 20:44

Did you get out and about today ball?

FrChewieLouie · 29/03/2015 20:53

Crabapple, I agree that talking about it to somebody does seem to take the edge off it. Saying out loud to dh that I thought I had health anxiety made it more real than the illnesses I was obsessively researching, somehow, and put the illnesses into the background. Plus, dh was very HA for a few years, and then it lifted (maybe because he is on SSRIs?), so it was helpful to know that he understood - and that it isn't necessarily going to go on forever!

That said, I still panic at the slightest thing - but I seem to have moved my focus away from imminent death and started fussing about the state of my skin instead. Still annoying, but not as depressing.

I haven't plucked up the nerve to mention it to my GP yet though Sad.

It's funny, because - like you - I was completely blase about my health and never gave it a second thought until last autumn. I don't get it.

buildmeabuttercup · 30/03/2015 12:59

I am feeling a bit better today. Moving away from DVT and onto cancer now (isn't that always the case!).

I can't really talk to anyone in real life, nobody understands they get annoyed and frustrated so I have to vent my frustrations out online. I have been loads better but there are times when it all comes back to me and I just can't cope.

I am also the same. Pre 2013 I had only been to the doctors a handful of times in my life. I was always a oh ill be fine person. Since I had a gut feeling that I was going to die young and not see my DD grow up I've been in a total state of anxiety over my health. Sad

crabapple34 · 30/03/2015 15:38

Hello, thought I'd drop this link here in case anyone finds it useful. It's a self help work book. I haven't read through it all yet but it looks quite good.

www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/infopax.cfm?Info_ID=53

I've had a good morning but I've had a lazy couple of hours and my chest is feeling tight. I'm definitely better when I'm doing something. Will get up and do something soon.

build Yes, I've been having intrusive thoughts about my own mortality, almost like a premonition that I will die young. They're only thoughts though and of course it's a symptom of the anxiety.

buildmeabuttercup · 01/04/2015 14:27

Thats exactly it, a premonition. It's a really awful feeling because we are constantly to told to 'trust our gut instincts' and my gut instinct is that I am going to die. It's frightening and it's only really started since I had my DD and became convinced that I'd never see her grow up.

I worry about anything that can kill me. DVT/aneurysms/appendicitis/meningitis/sepsis you name it and I have lost sleep over it.

I feel better than I did last year in how I deal with it. Before I would not leave the house unless it was to consistently go to the doctors, I'd have panic attacks, I would be a mess, I couldn't have normal relationships with the people I love because I was so consumed with the thought of me being ill that I cried for hours at a time, I couldn't be myself.

Now I do have the same thoughts, although less than before, but I handle them differently. I don't sit and cry, I try and get through my day with them hovering at the back of my mind. It's so hard, I just see my dd and beg to god that I get to see her grow up. Its just so so hard. Sad

crabapple34 · 01/04/2015 15:35

Wow build, it sounds like you've come a long way.
This illness is utterly beyond rationality. I look at my grandma who's 77 and think she's for and healthy and could easily have another ten years left. Yet I'm 25 and completely fit and healthy, yet I have a constant sense of impending doom over me.
I had a really good day yesterday, felt just like my old self until just before I went to bed. Ironically I was doing a mindfulness exercise when I had an unusual palpitation which sent me into a panic. I was lying in bed shaking and worrying for two hours. Knackered today

buildmeabuttercup · 01/04/2015 16:46

I'm 23, 24 in the summer. I have had 4 ECGs because I was utterly convinced I was about to have a heart attack. I was 21 at the time!

I agree it is completely irrational. Writing everything down on paper looks absolutely ridiculous but its so frustrating that you can see its irrational yet still feel that way. Night times used to be the worst for me too.

I remember once staying up all night (and I mean literally) because I thought I had something wrong with the artery in my heart, when its practically impossible to have at our age. I was laughed out the doctors but I could not be convinced. Horrible.

I feel like I have come a long way, I have tried to so hard. I was so wrapped up with feeling like I was dying that I wasn't actually living.

ballofworry · 01/04/2015 19:25

hows everyone feeling today ?

crabapple34 · 02/04/2015 20:46

Hi everyone.
I had a really good day today. The sun was out, I managed to get myself a second job and was just generally in a good mood without a hint of anxiety.

So now I'm at work and the anxiety is back. I really wish I could go one day without it. Being at work does seem to be a trigger. I do enjoy my job and it's not stressful, it's more the fact that I'm alone with my own thoughts
with out many distractions.

crabapple34 · 02/04/2015 20:46

Hi everyone.
I had a really good day today. The sun was out, I managed to get myself a second job and was just generally in a good mood without a hint of anxiety.

So now I'm at work and the anxiety is back. I really wish I could go one day without it. Being at work does seem to be a trigger. I do enjoy my job and it's not stressful, it's more the fact that I'm alone with my own thoughts
with out many distractions.

crabapple34 · 02/04/2015 20:47

Oops, sorry for the double post. Not sure what happened there.

buildmeabuttercup · 02/04/2015 20:59

I feel okay today.

From where I was two years ago I am feeling great, but the anxiety hasn't gone. Its been worse this past week than it has for a long time, I can see all the hard work (and getting to this stage was incredibly tough) unravelling.

I love my dd, I love my dp and my parents and I am worried about leaving them too soon. I have a toothache and I am obsessed with the infection (if there is one) spreading to my brain. I have had abscesses and the pain is absolutely nowhere near that level, but like we all know anxiety is not rational.

Hope everyone is feeling better x

crabapple34 · 03/04/2015 10:47

It's so tiring isn't it.

ballofworry · 04/04/2015 16:06

bad day today to much time alone and head chattering ..... Sad