My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Mental health

Anxiety support thread anyone :)

190 replies

YommyMommy · 24/10/2012 12:51

Was wondering of anyone was interested in a anxiety support thread :D

X x

OP posts:
Report
TomsBentPinky · 26/10/2012 18:01

I tried CBT but it was totally unrelated to my fears really so I didn't connect.

The majority of my anxieties lie with keeping my kids safe, i worry if they are at school and dont let them out of my site other than school.

I tried to let them stay at my mums but when we went to pick them up once the front door was wide open and her dog was running round the road Shock

My toddler daughter was there - it could have been her.

So they aren't even allowed to stay at my mums anymore.

I feel exhausted as I never have a 'break' but if i did have a break I'd spend the whole time worrying about the kids :( so it would be pointless.

Report
alwaysworriedtoo · 26/10/2012 21:23

I'll join. Luckily I am feeling mostly o.k at the moment. Only had a few minor wobbles but seem to be dealing with them rather well!
lots of Biscuit Biscuit for everyone...

I know what you are saying about the school playground. I sometimes smile to people I have recognised or been smiled at by, but most of the time I just talk to people I know because I am so arkward about talking to new people. I plucked up the courage once and started talking to a new mum, and I got a bit freaked because she came on so strong as was always pushing for play dates and saying how much her dd liked my dd, which was nice to hear but I sort of froze towards her and instead of stopping to talk as much, started to just say hello. I did feel really guilty but I'm a bit behind at coming forward (if you know what I mean) Im shy Grin
There does seem to be certain groups that I would never start talking too but I suppose I must look the same to other people only going to certain mums and dads. But if A familiar person is not there I won't just talk to anyone I will just stand there pretending to be confident and acting as if i'm not bothered there are groups of confident yummy mummys chatting around me. Blush

Report
alwaysworriedtoo · 26/10/2012 21:28

Gosh I just realised I am so dense sometimes! sorry I don't mean to be condesending YommyMommy I meant yummy mummys who I wonder how they get done all they say they do(How do they manage?) Not in a mean way.
Just had another thought it's probably because they get on with stuff unlike me procrastinating and mnetting!
I'll shut up now

Report
3monkeys · 26/10/2012 21:33

Hi. Can I join you? I have been anxious for years but coped ok. It used to be about DS1. More recently it's about bad weather, driving in bad weather, using the phone. I'm already worrying about what I'll do when it snows or is icy, and worrying about worrying! In the last year I've developed a terror of flying and we're going to Florida next year so I need to get over that one. It's ridiculous. We're going to Blackpool tomorrow for 1 night and I'm anxious about that

Report
YommyMommy · 26/10/2012 22:15

Welcome overtone new Grin great to see so many friendly faces!

Always don't worry about the yummy mummy thing... I'm actually not the stereo typical yummy mummy I just loved the name Smile

I started AD's tonight, so far I'm feeling fine i.e no side effects...hope it lasts!

Need to sleep now as last few days have been totally draining Sad

Good night all x x

OP posts:
Report
TomsBentPinky · 26/10/2012 23:42

3monkeys thats so weird im trying to gear mysrlf up for a night in blackpool but just cant book it.

Think ill end up just going for the day instead.

Im scared of flying too. i could NEVER book a flight. i dont think ill ever leave the uk again... scared of the sea too so no boats. lol

Report
3monkeys · 27/10/2012 00:25

We're staying over so I don't have to offer to drive one way for DH! The flying thing is daft. We've been to Aus twice but recently I've felt really nervous. I think I'm now scared of being scared. I'll let you know how Blackpool is. Hopefully I can encourage you to go :)

Report
AgentZigzag · 27/10/2012 03:02

Hello there Smile

I've been anxious for as long as I can remember, I get the top end of 'job interview anxiety' just going round the bloody shop a few doors down.

It's never even slightly gone away regardless of what I've tried to do (not to put anyone else off trying like), so I just try to live around how I know I am.

It's one of the reasons I love MN so much, I can have some kind of contact without having to actually interact with anyone as such.

I have OCD which makes me over imagine the horrible things which could happen to the DDs. It's totally normal to be anxious over your DC, but it's when it starts to interfere with the life you want for them that it becomes a problem, like not wanting them out of your sight. But it sounds like you have genuine concerns leaving them at your mums Toms Shock

Report
MummyVicky18 · 27/10/2012 04:09

Hiya can I join please

alwaysworriedtoo what you said at 26/10/12 21.23
Henners1 what you said on 26/10/11 9.42

Both comments struck a chord with me. I have been prescribed meds by doc but never taken them coz I thought 'I'm not depressed, I'm just being over sensitive I'll snap out of it' but looking at my behaviour especially towards social situations I do think its more anxiety than depression.

Don't know whether to stop breast feeding and start taking the meds. I think my mum has seen this in me for a while & she keeps saying I should take meds.

Report
Henners1 · 27/10/2012 12:23

Hi, when I first became Ill 7 years ago I didn't really want to take tablets but it got to the stage where I would do anything to try and fix the problem. It doesn't mean you will be on them for life, I came off them for 2 years. I always think, if you had a headache you'd take a pill to make it better so it's only the same thing.

If you wanted to keep breast feeding I think there's medication you can still take, I'm pretty sure sertraline is one of them.

I'm all worked up today because I have to go to a Halloween party tonight, i don't even know what I'm afraid of,it's going to be mainly family there - I really need to get a grip x

Report
alwaysworriedtoo · 27/10/2012 16:49

I went out today without my hand gel. I thought 'Oh Oh'
When we had finished our shopping we decided to eat out.
Ok how was I going to manage here.
Toilets, washed hands, opened the door using my sleeve. D.D=did she touch the wall near the hand dryer when she was drying her hands?
OK No hand gel to redo them. Its ok. Should I damp a napkin with my drink and rewipe her hands?
NO NO NEED. She is playing about with the free gift we got. other people have touched that. If dh had brought her on his own I wouldn't know.
I must have sat there so tense for about two minutes.
I looked around the restaurant =lots of people touching tables, menus, condiment bottles, chairs then eating. No one is using gel no one is freaking out.
I can do this.
I breathed deep, recited my 6x tables and relaxed.
I tell dh that I nearly freaked out but didn't totally (boasting)
'he says well done! You have done it this time you can do it again, we can throw out all your hand gel'
I think a look of panic must have crossed my face as I replied 'not quiet yet!' I explained how I had managed. he said, quiet rightly, that if he had said that(about the other people who are sitting straight down to eat, no hand washing or gel and then eating with their fingers) to me I would have discounted it.
He manages without copious handgel usage all the time and he is always fine.
So far so good.
I enjoy my meal and forget about 'GERMS'
At the end of the meal d.d is given a choccy apple in a wrapper. then after a moment I notice there is a rip in the wrapper.
When did that happen.
I sit for a moment debating do I ask if we can change it? Do I not let her have it? I point it out.'have you opened it already?'
her answer is no.
I say 'Ask your daddy if it is still ok'
Hmm
She then opened it fully and began to eat it.
AAAgghh.
Breath.
If I wasn't here I would have never known about it.
Dh hasn't said anything against it.
Yes it is fine I tell myself. It probably only just happened because she was swirling it round in her hand. it was only a small rip in a very gathered up wrapper. What on earth do I expect to happen.
And repeat
If I wasn't here I would never have known about it. If I hadn't looked at the wrapper I wouldn't have seen it.

Now a few hours later. We are still fine. No stomach aches, no headaches nothing.

I managed to eat out without handgel and have not ''totally freaked about the apple!
Smile

Report
YommyMommy · 27/10/2012 19:59

Well done always worried! Grin x x

OP posts:
Report
YommyMommy · 27/10/2012 20:05

Henners hope it party goes well x x

OP posts:
Report
BustyDeLaGhetto · 27/10/2012 20:18

I suffered incredibly badly with Panic Attacks for fifteen years which gradually worsened after I became pregnant with DD and slowly bloomed into severe Post Natal Depression and Panic Disorder. I was literally crippled with anxiety and struggled to leave the house without feeling as though I was going mad with anxiety. I became practically agoraphobic and at my worst point was convinced I was having some sort of breakdown.
I want to reassure everyone on this thread that however insurmountable it seems, however much you want to curl up in a ball and escape from it, anxiety and panic attacks ARE treatable and it IS manageable. I have written an article online about this recently, and about how bad things got for me and about how I am managing ? very, very slowly ? to improve after so many years of suffering. I won?t link to it here as it feels a bit like shamelessly advertising but if you want to read it, I am happy to send a link, just DM me.
I know what it?s like, and it?s isolating and frightening but you can cope and you can get through it, you just need to find the right medication, or therapy or support which works for you so please don?t give up!

Report
YommyMommy · 27/10/2012 20:40

Hi busty, thank you for that post! I for one would love to read ur blog. It's great to hear success stories! X x

OP posts:
Report
BustyDeLaGhetto · 27/10/2012 20:50

I have just sent you a message Yommy, but the link didn't work so you will need to copy and paste I'm afraid.

computerdunce

Report
sweetkitty · 27/10/2012 21:02

Hi can I join? So much of this thread rings true for me. The constant worry of something happening to the DC is my big fear, I think they are going to get leukaemia. Or something as I watched a friends DD die of it this year and keep thinking that could have easily been one of mine. I do stress if they are out of my sight, DS is 2 and the longest I've been away from him must be about 6 hours (apart from when DD3 was in hospital). I am terrified DH is going to crash his car and due every night he is driving back from work. Im scared of driving too as I can actually see myself crashing, you know imagine it.

Report
YommyMommy · 27/10/2012 21:28

Welcome sweet kitty Grin

Feel free to vent and input! X x

OP posts:
Report
MummyVicky18 · 27/10/2012 22:00

Could you guys please help me work out a decision? I know only I can make the final call but I need some help.

I have been invited out to two different events on the same night & I don't know what to do.

One is with my mum so I feel more comforted by that and the night out will only be from 7 til 11

The other event is with some old work colleagues. Event from 6 til 2am. Now with this one I feel touched that they asked me to join them but I'm worried about how the night will go having not been around them in ages. Also I don't feel close to many people so don't want to keep turning people down - maybe this could be a chance to reconnect?

The times of the events are bothering me too as my baby is only 4 months and I don't know how I'll cope with coming home at 2am to have to deal with a baby.

It might not sound like much but I've been trying to make this decision for days and when I think about it I feel a bit sick Sad

Report
YommyMommy · 28/10/2012 09:29

Morning mummy vicky, if I was you i'd go to the night out ur most comfortable going to! Smile x x

OP posts:
Report
Henners1 · 28/10/2012 14:03

Hi mummy Vicky, I have had dilemmas like this in the past. I'm always afraid of losing friends so whenever a night out was planned I would go, even when I was at my most anxious. I usually got though the night ok and it gave me a bit of a boost to know that I'd achieved it, and even managed to have a good time.

That said this doesn't work for everyone and if the thought of going out with your work colleagues will make you Ill then I'd go for the other option, I'm sure they'll understand especially as you have such a young baby x

Report
Henners1 · 28/10/2012 18:23

Had a bad day today, but then again every day is bad at the moment. Last night was ok but felt pretty anxious throughout it, keep thinking imagine if I had to go out for the night somewhere other than a family party.

Getting really frustrated with this now. I'd be happy if i could just relax in my own home or at least take my little boy for a walk without feeling like the world is spinning. Can't see this ever ending but I have to believe it will I suppose.

X

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

YommyMommy · 28/10/2012 18:43

Sorry today has been a bad one henners Sad I've had a tight chest most of the day, but managed to get out and about.

I'm looking forward to bed time Grin

Are you on any meds or getting counselling? X x

OP posts:
Report
Salbertina · 28/10/2012 18:57

Gosh, bad day here too. Whats been stressing me?

Having to move in next month or 2
Struggling to find somewhere a. Decent b. affordable
Dc1s defiant behavior much of the time
Dh's lack of help w chores
Work meeting tomorrow
Feeling left out by friends
Jobhunt in UK pending
Money

Bit too much change all at once

Fucking wind, makes me edgy...
End if rant

Report
MummyVicky18 · 28/10/2012 19:05

Thanks guys, I'm thinking of taking a deep breath and going with the friends/ old work colleagues DH & DF have given me get out plans.

If baby J isn't settled by 10.30 then DH will come and pick me up - this will stop me worrying about baby J & DH. Or if all is well at home & I just want to leave early DF has said he will pick me up.

I've got a prescription for meds but have not taken any yet. I'm thinking it might be time though

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.