Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Original poster

To want to be a healthy and happy mum

26 replies

cheekypickle · 03/07/2012 21:47

I had my DD 10months ago. Perfect pregnancy, lovely water birth everything was great.

Then when she was three months I got puerpual psychosis was admitted to hospital and had a terrible time.

Came out of hospital and coped well until I got depression... Back to hospital.

Since coming out DD goes to childminders 9-5pm whilst I am going back on/off to work.

I feel I can't be a SAHM but feel miserable at work too

Generally feel down in the dumps about it all.

I was a really good mum until the illness and bi polar kicked in

I want to be a good mum again

OP posts:
squeezed · 03/07/2012 22:01

I'm so sorry that you've had such a tough time. Are you continuing to get support to stay well? Just because you are unwell it doesn't mean that you aren't a "good mum". Try to keep going with it.

PreciousPuddleduck · 03/07/2012 22:02

You poor thing, you have had an awful time though you sound like such a well intentioned & good mummy [hugs]

doggiemumma · 03/07/2012 22:04

You are doing your best - that makes you the best mum xxx

kotinka · 03/07/2012 22:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SecretPlace · 03/07/2012 22:13

doggiemumma got it in one. The fact that you're worrying about being a good mum shows that you are trying your very best and that in my eyes is the sign of a good mum.

Hope you start feeing better Op x

Ambivalence · 03/07/2012 22:24

cheekypickle - I really feel for you, I was diagnosed as bipolar at 21 (went manic after 4 years of terrible depressive episodes) and had to be hospital for it - truly the worst time in my life ever (have been well for the past 14 years ). What a dreadful time you've had of it.

I am sure you are a good mum though, as others have said, you actually care enough to worry about it! You are still recovering as well, so it will all get better - I think you really need to hold onto that.

((((hugs)))))

KateSpade · 03/07/2012 22:32

What is puerpual psychosis?

But about the SAHM bit, you are preaching to the choir! I took around 10 weeks off them went back to work, although exhausting i loved it, and it made my day coming home to my beautiful baby. Now I'm on my Summer holidays from uni and at home everyday, its driving me mad. I honestly dont think i can do it till the end of september.

The fact that your bothered about wanting to be a good mum (im sure you are) makes you a good mum. (If you get what i mean!)

thisisyesterday · 03/07/2012 22:36

would working part-time be an option?

do you want to be a SAHM but feel you can't in case the depression comes back or is it more that you just feel you want/need to work for other reasons?

it's sad that you are miserable at work too :(

how would you like it to be? i am sure you are a very good mum, otherwise you wouldn't be worrying over this

Cherriesarelovely · 03/07/2012 22:53

I don't have any great words or wisdom but just wanted to say that I think you sound as though you have had an incredibly tough time. It is not your fault that you became ill, how horrible for you. It sounds to me as though you are being a good mum. There is nothing wrong with you being at work but I agree with others maybe you need to cut down to part time to have the best of both worlds as it were. I wish you the very best of luck, you deserve a break xx

Original poster
cheekypickle · 04/07/2012 07:45

I want to be a SAHM but am really scared that I'll get depressed, I think I probably would get depressed.

OP posts:
Original poster
cheekypickle · 04/07/2012 07:46

I dont think going back to work is a bad thing , DD is very happy at the childminders

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 04/07/2012 08:41

Have you given yourself long enough to settle down after being so ill and in hospital, before going back to work?

Original poster
cheekypickle · 04/07/2012 08:45

I hate being at home by myself it makes me anxious hence why I'm going back to work

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 04/07/2012 08:52

But being back at work isn't that great either is it, from the threads you've posted ( forgive me if I'm confusing you with another poster)

Original poster
cheekypickle · 04/07/2012 08:55

I dont know what to do for. The best. Work is hard. But being a stay at home mum is hard too

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 04/07/2012 08:57

What does you CPN say?

Original poster
cheekypickle · 04/07/2012 09:00

What's a CPN?

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 04/07/2012 09:01

Community phsyichiatric nurse. Or your support team?

Original poster
cheekypickle · 04/07/2012 09:15

I don't know. DH wants me to go back full time. And that's what I've already arranged with work

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 04/07/2012 09:18

Aren't you in contact with a support team after coming out of hospital?

Original poster
cheekypickle · 04/07/2012 09:20

Yes I am but I don't know what they think

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 04/07/2012 09:22

You haven't discussed back to work plans etc with them? Blimey, I had to go over everything when I got out of hospital!

Original poster
cheekypickle · 04/07/2012 09:23

They haven't asked pretty much let me get on with it. I hate feeling so anxious and unsure all the time. I used to be really confident

Sorry to hear you've been in hospital too

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 04/07/2012 09:26

Could you ask for some counselling? Sounds like you need to talk some things over.

Feminine · 04/07/2012 09:32

cheeky ...:) I don't think you are well enough to work, and I think you need more help to stay home at the moment.

Also, considering your line of work, shouldn't you be in good health to be any good at it?

Good luck.