Support thread - adults on the Autistic Spectrum :)

[fuzzpig]

Hello!

I've seen a lot of MNers mention being on the Spectrum, whether diagnosed or not. I thought we could use a long-running place to chat, share coping strategies and basically to know there are other people like ourselves, who won't judge us for being different.

I'm new to all this myself - only realised there was a possible name for How I Am a couple of weeks ago (thanks to MN)! Now I have a referral to an adult ASD specialist, to see if I have Aspergers. It's all happened very quickly.

Enough waffle from me (for now anyway...) but I hope other people will come along and find this thread useful. :)

Just read the other thread, posted on it, and PM'd you.

Just found this thread again after 'losing it' for a few weeks.

Fuzzpig I read your other thread. I'm not really close to you (Newhaven) but if I can help in any way please ask me :) I used to work for DWP so happy to help with form filling etc if you want/need it.

Hi all, just remarking my place, hope people come back :)

Hi fuzzpig, I followed the link...

Marking my place also.

Hey all

Marking my place...

Hello! Welcome folkgirl and somebloke, do jump in or just read if that's easier :)

Since I am up (feeling really sick so sitting in the bathroom... am very scared about sick!) I will do my update now.

So, I've been to the doctor at last as things have pretty much reached crisis point. Started self harming again (only minor but something I had previously only done once since having dc1 who is 5), crying myself to sleep a lot, etc. I think it's a combination of things, DH is finally getting surgery soon, my parents are divorcing and selling my childhood house (complicated feelings there...), and to top it all off I am really struggling with full time work. It's quite a physical job anyway but it's more a problem with being around people all the time, it is so exhausting and even though I love the work I find myself increasingly reluctant to go in. I am becoming even more paranoid and am constantly second guessing things and expecting criticism.

Anyway. So I went to the doctor and he phoned the duty hospital person. She said not to change anything - so no starting antidepressants etc - but they are going to push my referral forward (which looks like it got lost to begin with ) and the upshot is I should get my assessment soon.

The other news is, I think I mentioned before my DS (2.10) has delayed speech and we were a bit worried he may be on the spectrum too. We finally had his developmental assessment and the specialist said she is not at all concerned about autism - his social communication was pretty good and he was on 'target' for all areas except speech. Which is about 14 months behind where it should be. That bit was a shock, I didn't realise it was so bad, but I guess we understand him most of the time whereas nobody else would be able to.

We also had an audiology check - they said he is a bit congested due to frequent colds, and they will refer him to ENT if it's not cleared up in a few months as he does have some minor hearing loss - but they did confirm that it is not enough to have caused such a big delay in speech. I'm at a loss really, I don't know what else could be causing this, but he's been referred back to SALT so hopefully we can get some help.

Had an appt with family outreach worker the other day. But she didn't show up and only contacted me after I texted her! Not impressed as goodness knows we need the help right now. DH has a presurgical assessment on 23rd so hopefully things will start improving soon

I'm reading a book my boss let me borrow - her friend was dxd as Aspie recently and she self published a book about it. It's staggering how many similarities I'm noticing!

Just did the questionaire and my results are as follows:

Aspie Score: 98 out of 200
Neurotypical score: 98 out of 200.

Can anyone decipher this for me, as I don't understand what it means.

Hmm, not sure. It should've said underneath what it meant (I think mine was "you are probably an Aspie" or something like that). Have you done the AQ test linked to earlier? It's not as in depth but might give you an idea (though it is better suited to males apparently)

Also check out this page as it lists the symptoms in categories. It is not an exhaustive list but if you read it and think any of it sounds like you, it might be worth following up

It would probably say you have both AS/NT traits.

I hope that things are getting better for you now Fuzzpig. It sounds like there are so many things going on for you. I know I would find it hard to cope with too. For me if just one thing in my life is stressful and 'not right' it affects everything and my whole routine just falls apart. If you have seen the episode of Big Bang Theory when Sheldon can't get his hair cut so starts wearing tuesday PJs on a friday and playing bongos at 3am, that kind of explains it.

Anyway I also have some news. I have got my appointment to see the speech and language therapist. It is next wednesday. She actually made the appointment by phone with me which I wasn't expecting. I started panicking as I'm not good with phone calls and especially when she asked if the appointment could be at my house. I didn't know they did that and probably sounded crazy because I kept saying how I don't like people coming into my house. Also I am still not sure what they do and what questions she will ask me so that is occupying a lot of my thinking right now.

Ooh haven't seen that episode - is it series 5? We recently got 1-4 on DVD. Introduced my DSD (14) to it and now she loves it too :o Anyway, it does seem like what you describe, all the shit is happening at once. I have one more day at work and then I'm off for a week, which might help a bit.

Very exciting about the SLT but of course I see why it is scary. Unknown is scary! I guess they want to do it in your house because she will see you in a more natural setting, but if it makes you uncomfortable then is there an alternative? Will you be seeing her in a clinic instead?

I unfortunately can't help on the question front, I've only seen a SLT for my 2yo so presumably very different indeed! I can't remember, have you or anyone else involved in your previous tests actually mentioned ASDs? By which I mean are they specifically looking for that. Or are they doing lots of tests in the hope of finding 'something'.

Either way I'm sure they'll end up at Aspergers. Maybe the SLT will be looking at how you use language (literal interpretations etc?). Anyway, it really sucks but I reckon the fact you are uncomfortable with things like this - and most importantly that you are telling them so - is actually helpful. Those things might be noticed by the various assessors and hopefully they will realise what they mean.

Yes its series 5, episode 18. I wish I had the boxset, but if I did I would want to just watch it all day and even less would get done in my house than now.

The SLT has arranged for a room at the local health centre instead. I have been there a few times before so I am ok about going there. The Educational Psychologist I saw in March recommended that I should see the SLT for 'assessment of socialization and communication difficulties.'
The student support worker at university did mention AS when he was talking about the Educational Psychologists report. I can't really remember what he said exactly though. He also uses the word 'neurodiversity' a lot but I find it hard to understand everything he says especially that day because I was distracted by his yellow socks and bright blue trainers!

hello checking back in, my job is probably similar to yours in many ways, but in a healthcare environment, Fuzzpig. Have also been going through self-doubt, finding a colleague who had previously been pleasant being difficult and moody. Organisation change is also on the cards so I may end up dealing with a lot of phone queries, which I am absolutely dreading. I am OK if I am asked something basic that I can answer, but get anxious if I have to deal with queries outside my comfort zone.

Sounds mostly reassuring news re:your child's appointment, Fuzzpig, you may want to look into verbal dyspraxia, see if that seems a possibility.

System - hope the appointment with the SALT goes OK. I imagine they will be looking at how you deal with inferences/identifying others emotions etc, but I may be wrong, as only have experience of SALT with a younger age group.

Thanks TLP, I'd never heard of that so I had a quick google. I guess he is too young to be assessed for that yet though?

Funnily enough I have been wondering lately if some of my problems are more dyspraxia-like than Aspie. Found a list of symptoms and many of them are like me but others are the opposite (eg I'm good at maths and piano) so now I'm

Hi Folks, just back from seeing my beloved MIL in hospital (she has advanced pancreatic cancer and probably won't make it til Xmas). Cycled there and back (14 miles in all).

What I'm posting about is that I love her to bits (she has done so much for me and DH over the years) but I'm not devastated about her dying and never have been. My dad is also on his way out and I'm the same with him, even though he has been a wonderful dad .

I've gone to funerals, but never get emotional about it, but more that I sit there watching other relatives crying their hearts out and I feel nothing at all. No numbness, just no emotion about dying and death. Saying that, I'm happy and enjoy life and so on and so forth, so I don't think I'm numb. It's like I'm just shrugging my shoulders and in a non-plussed way IYSWIM

Does anyone know if this is a trait or is it something more to it? I haven't a clue whether this is normal or not.

PackItIn - I think feeling things differently or demonstrating feelings from the accepted norms can be a trait of ASD. I strongly believe that feeling things differently isn't the same as not feeling them at all. I don't know whether what you have described, the almost bewildered feeling, could tie in with the theories around stages of grief (that first stage is unreality).

Fuzz - I'm not sure re:verbal dyspraxia, my instinct is that they are never too young for any sort of SALT iyswim. As my DS never had that, might be worth you asking around on SN board for people whose kids did get it diagnosed.

There is a mahoosive crossover between AS/ADHD/Dyspraxia/Dyslexia etc so not surprising that you also feel you experience dyspraxia symtoms as well. I am v clumsy, poor sense of direction etc too, can barely tell right from left.

General query for everyone - does anyone find that caffeine can make them v. v talkative - even tho I regularly drink coffee, just one or two cups too many makes me really "buzzy" from silent to chatty, from lethargic to hyper?

I hate coffee and don't particularly like tea. The only caffeine I have is Pepsi Max or similar. I am ridiculously sensitive to it though (presumably as I don't otherwise have caffeine) so I can't drink it after about 2pm.

I have been thinking about dyspraxia a lot. I'd never even considered it until quite recently - I had always thought of it as something that made you do badly in school, and academically I never struggled. But a lot of it makes sense - things I am terrible at which I just thought were my fault and used as yet another stick to beat myself with. :(

I saw the doctor again today and he was concerned that I still haven't heard from the mental health team despite now being an urgent case. I have their number to try and phone this week. They are not specialised in ASD so I have no idea what to expect from an assessment. And now I'm wondering - should I mention the dyspraxia thing? Or would that be separately assessed by an educational psychologist? Due to past experience I am very nervous of getting professionals' backs up by suggesting my own diagnoses, or of seeming like a hypochondriac...

I wouldn't say "I think I have dyspraxia". I would say - I have difficulties with ..... whatever you have difficulties with that's relevant.

Hi, Can I join in? I have just joined MN and on my very first thread, got posts deleted for referring to myself as Aspie - as that is apparently offensive, and I was asked to apologise - and for asking a direct question of a poster that was not making any logical sense. Apparently that is frowned upon here too. Someone kindly pointed out this thread. I haven't read it all yet, but I did the test at the beginning:

Your Aspie score: 136 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 69 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie

I have previously done the Simon Baron Cohen test and scored 39 - which scared me a bit as that puts me in the extreme range.....

Anyway, I shall go back and read all your posts...

Eh? I refer to myself as an Aspie (diagnosed) all the time. I've never been deleted and how can it be offensive if you are using it to describe yourself? Bizarre.

Your Aspie score: 172 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 44 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie

Morning, Bubba.

I did see that thread: your posts weren't deleted for referring to yourself as Aspie. They were deleted because the poster you were asking questions of was very upset and it wasn't the right time for you to keep challenging the detail of some of her statements.

My Aspie score is similar to yours, and one of the things I have had to consciously learn over the years is when to recognise that the 'facts' of a situation are less important than listening to the distress of the person involved.

Hello to all and welcome to the newbies :)

FWIW I have only ever seen the word Aspie used in a positive way by people referring to themselves or their children, it really seems to be 'owned' by the AS community IYSWIM and I've never encountered it as an insult. So don't worry about that. In fact I was thinking when this thread gets full the second thread should have Aspies in the title :o

I have news! My assessment is September 7th! At least that is when I meet the psychologist, but the CPN reckons he will assess me then. Oh my gosh! Can't believe it's actually happening. Excited but scared. He also wants to look over my notes from CAMHS which is a bit unnerving as I don't want them to judge me on my sketchy past :(

Other news is shit, I've been off work for nearly a month after what seems to be an acute episode of a longer term problem I've had for over a year. Got blood tests tomorrow to rule stuff out but doctor suspects Chronic Fatigue Syndrome :(

Hello new people

Sorry to hear you have been so poorly, Fuzzpig. good but nervewracking that you have a set date for the assessment now! I hope your health improves soon, and that it isn't CFS, but something quicker and easier to "fix".