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Original poster

Support thread - adults on the Autistic Spectrum :)

717 replies

fuzzpig · 16/03/2012 08:41

Hello!

I've seen a lot of MNers mention being on the Spectrum, whether diagnosed or not. I thought we could use a long-running place to chat, share coping strategies and basically to know there are other people like ourselves, who won't judge us for being different.

I'm new to all this myself - only realised there was a possible name for How I Am a couple of weeks ago (thanks to MN)! Now I have a referral to an adult ASD specialist, to see if I have Aspergers. It's all happened very quickly.

Enough waffle from me (for now anyway...) but I hope other people will come along and find this thread useful. :)

OP posts:
MaryBS · 18/04/2012 10:07

Today I feel stupid and tearful. I was given something to read last night, and its sort of important to be able to read and understand it, but it doesn't make sense and says weird stuff that confuses. It says ridiculous things like "being deep in our DNA as Christians", which is wrong. So I feel stupid. Should I say something? Its written by the bishop of my diocese. I could contact him, but would he respond appropriately and sensitively, I wonder? Or will I just get fobbed off and feel worse than before?

Original poster
fuzzpig · 18/04/2012 10:41

I'm not sure what to suggest. Certainly I get annoyed with nonsensical sentences etc. But I absolutely cannot get on with religion, my brain won't agree with it (not in a nasty way, I obviously respect others' beliefs, I just can't believe it myself)

What also annoys me is people not finishing their sentences... I usually know what they're going to say but I HATE that they don't say it!

OP posts:
ThePinkPussycat · 18/04/2012 10:48

Sounds like the bishop is being metaphorical, can you sort of 'get' what he means and rephrase it to yourself, mary?

eg being in deep in our psyche as Christians

Re the sentence finishing. DF quite often doesn't finish his, he likes the other person to do it to show they understand, and I am a bit the same - we both have AS. But it annoys DD that I don't finish sentences sometimes.

MaryBS · 18/04/2012 11:34

The problem for me is that the metaphors don't make sense. I use a lot of metaphors myself. But these are like "square metaphors in a round hole" :)

ThePinkPussycat · 18/04/2012 11:53

Am happy to provide a translation service if you want! Am having a very lazy day, it could be fun...

devilinside · 18/04/2012 12:01

Mary, I'd just try and laugh at the ridiculous language? That's what DP and I do.

I used to work in marketing/PR where that kind of nonsensical jargon was rife. Most of it went over my head (metaphor alert Wink )

MaryBS · 18/04/2012 12:20

Thanks. I know what he is getting and and the message he is trying to get across, I am just cross about the way he has worded it. If you go to this website: www.ely.anglican.org, search for "imagining the future", and click on the "Download the imagining the future document" link, which is the second on the list. This is a lot easier to read than the booklet that has been published, which I was given, (which was printed with TWENTY characters to an inch!)

I take some comfort from the fact that my vicar finds it impossible to connect with what he is saying as well!

Original poster
fuzzpig · 18/04/2012 13:46

Mixed metaphors (if I'm understanding the term correctly) are bad. Generally I love language, I enjoy a good simile - but sometimes they don't work and I hate that.

It wrecks reading for me sometimes, I just pull the sentences apart instead of enjoying them. I read a sentence (often dialogue) and then replay it in my head the way I think it should've been written.

OP posts:
devilinside · 18/04/2012 14:13

I just had to google mixed metaphors Blush. If someone spoke like that to me, I'd have to punch them Grin

ThePinkPussycat · 18/04/2012 15:56

I have read a lot of NHS mental health bumpf in the course of my work, and having downloaded that file, I am very much reminded of it.

Can't help but ask you mary, are you cross-shaped? And do you aspire to be at the centre, which isn't at the centre, but at the edge?

The NHS documents always had a load of waffle a number of paragraphs saying how service users views should be respected etc etc, stuff you would thing didn't need saying again for the umpteenth time and wasting umpteen bits of paper across the land. The good Bishop seems to be saying a lot of things that don't need saying are part of Christianity, and, like the NHS docs, talking in generalities rather than specifics (mind you, I only read to p5). I think he could have said what he wanted to say on 2 sides of A4.

MaryBS · 18/04/2012 16:52

No, I'm person shaped. And I'd rather be an Easter person. And I'm both at the centre and on the edge, but for differing reasons. Funny that you should mention mental health as our bishop has had a lot to say on the subject.

Our vicar reckons he could have said all that in 1 page of A4! :o

SystemofaDowny · 18/04/2012 17:40

"being deep in our DNA as Christians"

"are you cross-shaped? And do you aspire to be at the centre, which isn't at the centre, but at the edge?"

either these exams have burnt out my brain cells or I have woken up on a different planet today

ThePinkPussycat · 18/04/2012 17:48

To be fair, what I wrote was merely based on the original, do have a look, it's worth it :)

ThePinkPussycat · 18/04/2012 17:49

And how's it going, system?

I must take my own advice to you upthread, have been on MN most of today!

SystemofaDowny · 18/04/2012 18:56

The exams? Its my last one tomorrow. Microbiology and Biotechnology, the subject I hate most. Once that is over then I will start on something else as I can only think about one thing at a time. It probably should be my research project as its due on 27th of april, but so far I don't even know what topic it will be about.

ValiumQueen · 18/04/2012 20:54

Greetings - I have not read the thread as I am not feeling too good at the moment, so could I please check is this thread just for folk on Autistic Spectrum, or for those who have a loved one on the Spectrum?

DB has recently been diagnosed with Aspergers in his mid 40s, and is currently suicidal. He has been suicidal before some 8 years ago, and his current feelings are not 'just' because of the recent diagnosis.

many thanks

ThePinkPussycat · 18/04/2012 23:42

Hi valium I'm sure we'd be happy to help in any way we can. There is another fairly recent thread somewhere which might also help, I'll look for it (might not be tonight tho) and post a link. - Actually I've already posted a link nearish the top of this one.

My AS is undiagnosed, but I am sure, and have even convinced my psychiatrist. My difficulty in fitting in made me v depressed for years, I would also go into overdrive on occasion, hence had a diagnosis of bi-polar. I have been v severely depressed on a number of occasions, to the point where I could see no hope, I had suicidal ideas but knew I wouldn't act on them. My lesser depression, I believe, was caused by ADD - no motivation, though I knew what I should be doing, this led to frustration, and then depression. Also working in regular paid employment has always led to me being depressed...

Any of these ring bells for your DB? Anyone else in your family show traits? (My DF has it I'm sure, which added an extra layer of unhelpful complication, and DB has definite traits)

MaryBS · 19/04/2012 08:42

Hope the exams go well system.

Valium it may be worth checking out the "Wrong Planet" website, there's a lot of help and info on there, plus a very big Aspie community with forums. I've learned to deal with feelings of depression, and any suicidal type feelings have been because of hormones (just before a period, and now "in hand"). Hope he is getting some decent help.

ValiumQueen · 19/04/2012 09:18

Thank you ladies.

My brother has always been troubled, and I thought he was Bi-Polar. He sought his own diagnosis, and feels better for knowing why he has struggled. He thinks Dad is also on Spectrum. It would explain a lot, but at age 79 there is no point investigating.

I will come back when I am feeling a bit stronger, VQ

Original poster
fuzzpig · 19/04/2012 09:33

Hi Valium :)

Mary may I ask how you sorted out the period-related depression? Mine gets massively worse before. I'm wondering about trying birth control, but I worry about side effects.

OP posts:
MaryBS · 19/04/2012 11:48

I had an IUS (Mirena) fitted. Have had no side-effects, only benefits. Gone from dreadful PMS to no PMS and my periods are scarce and very light, when they were incredibly heavy. Slightly traumatic actually having it fitted, but apart from that its been marvellous!

Original poster
fuzzpig · 19/04/2012 12:08

Oh damn :( there is no way I could have that.

I have been prescribed diazepam just for a smear test which I still haven't dared book yet

OP posts:
MaryBS · 19/04/2012 12:11

You could have it done at the same time as a smear test, maybe (although that may not be possible as you might need the results of the smear before they fit the IUS)? I know its a horrible procedure, and I can't pretend it is pleasant, but then neither is PMS and heavy bleeding. It really was worth it for me!

only4tonight · 19/04/2012 12:32

Hi and thanks Mary for sending me to this thread.

This morning I have done both an aq test and the test at the start of this thread. Seeing "very likely an aspie" written twice about ones self in a very sort period of time is kind of difficult to take.

I am, I think, pretty well functioning. So I don't feel like I need a formal diagnosis, but I do feel a bit of a fraud being here.

A few weeks ago dds playgroup pointed out some observations about her communication skills, and her defiance against potty training (she is very nearly 3). Since then I have been trying to help her with her communication skills but it seems to come less naturally to her than to me. Responding to her name, looking at people when they talk, answering questions etc are all areas that she finds hard.

On the one hand I feel bad trying to push her to behave "normally" but on the other primary school was rubbish for me and I really don't want her to have to go through that.

Any advice would be gratefully received.

Thanks

SystemofaDowny · 19/04/2012 12:48

I failed today's exam. I couldn't even answer the whole of question 1. The others were even worse so I just left early. Now trying to work out what to do next as this means I have almost certainly failed the whole year now.

Fuzzpig do you think you could manage having a subdermal contraceptive implant? It has almost the same affects as the mirena coil but goes in your arm instead.