diagnosed with pnd 2 weeks ago, please talk sense to me

[poppypops]

Hi, my little boy is 6 weeks old. I was diagnosed with pnd 2 weeks. My main problem is anxiety especially around sleeping. I went for a few days with little or no sleep and got myself into such a state and had a complete meltdown. Fast forward 2 weeks and I have been on sertraline 50mg for the past 16 days and have been taking 3.75mg of zopliclone to help me sleep.

Started to feel a small improvement with my anxiety and low mood in the past 3 days so last night decided to take half dose of sleeping tablet. I woke up at 2 after little sleep and low and behold have been awake since. My little boy sleeps well so it's not him which is worse as I could rationalise that.

Basically, I have got myself into such a state today thinking this is it I will never be able to sleep again. Worried that I will end up back as I was 2 weeks ago and that is a horrible and scary thought. Having had a few goodish days the fall down is so horrible.

Please talk sense to me. Can anyone tell me a positive recovery story with sertraline. Once they are in my system a bit more should there be an improvement with my sleep or ability to fall back to sleep. I am desperately seeking reassurance that life will improve. I know 2 weeks is such a short time but it has felt like a lifetime getting here.

Getdown that's still 5 hours sleep in between. About what I get most nights, enough to function fine even if a bit more would be better.

I think especially the quetiapine is known for weightgain. Hopefully you won't have to be on that one for too long. But even so, you will lose the weight again, your MH is more important right now.

Hello! I wonder if you've spoken to The Association for Post Natal Illness?

A fantastic organisation that know all about what you're going through...

thanks madmouse. I think it may be a combination of things - I lost over half a stone during the time I was ill (about 3 weeks), and I am still breastfeeding so maybe it's partly my body trying to claw back some calories.... I don't want to gain loads of weight! Have decided to go for a run later. But of course you're right, it's better that I'm well at the moment.

Hi emmiedarling I have heard of APNI but never actually called them. I think when I'm really ill I don't feel coherent enough to explain it all to a stranger, and then when I am coherent I feel better and like I don't really need to speak to anyone. Maybe the OP would benefit from calling them. Hope she is ok.

GetDownYouWillFall - I understand how that can sometimes be the case. They have a good website which is worth looking at: www.apni.org so if you dont want to speak to them, you can atleast get support from there. You can also email if that's easier [email protected]

They know about what can help, where you can get extra support and generally they are very reassuring and keep reminding you that you will get better! (Which you will because PND is temporary illness)

They also speak to partners, mums, friends etc. Which is fab if they dont really understand what is happening to you.

xxx

Hi All, Getdown - am so pleased you are turning that corner :) Food is a nightmare isnt it. I went from not eating to wanting to eat everything. Slimming World starts tonight so will have to be disciplined from now on :) Anyone heard from Poppypops. Am worried that we havent heard from her for a while now? K x

Yes the eating could definitely be a problem! I am starving all the time, even after a large meal Have bought some oatcakes hoping they will stave off the hunger pangs!

I was wondering the same re. poppypops hope she is ok.

Hi Getdown and Alicia, sorry I have been really busy the past few days. Thanks for asking after me. My DH has been working late and I have been running around trying to get two children sorted. Although I am up from 6am, still manage to not be organised enough to get us out the door in time for pre-school!

Hope everyone is well. Getdown you really sound like you have turned the corner. I am so so pleased for you. Your posts sound much more positive too. Don't worry about the hunger. Think your mental health is much more important for now so enjoy the extra cream cake. In a short time you will be back to full speed and running around burning it all off again.

All going well here. Slept ok last night. Was awake to feed at 3.30ish and was wide awake thinking this is it, but must have fell back to sleep at some stage as I don't remember much else until 6.30. Progress, although slow but I do feel much more positive. Not as anxious either which makes life more pleasant. It has been 23 days I think since I started the sertraline. Think I have responded well to it. Still have moments of nausea during the day but nothing major.

Please keep posting Getdown, it is lovely to read you are doing well. DH about now for the next few days so I will keep up to date x x

Glad to hear you are doing ok poppypops. I am very fortunate in that DH has been sleeping downstairs with the baby so I've had some undisturbed nights. He generally sleeps through but was up at 2:30 last night apparently I expect I will be up with him again in a few days, but still feel slightly worried about getting disturbed in the night and not being able to go back to sleep. We'll see. Anyway I'm really glad things seem to be getting better, for us both!

Hello Getdown, just checking to see how you are? Hope you are enjoying this beautiful weather. All going well here. Have had a busy 6 days and feeling shattered today.

Got a 4 week review tomorrow to see how I am getting on with the tablets. Still feeling anxious on and off but not sure if I need to give them more time.

Hope you are well x

Hi poppy thanks I am doing well. Yes this lovely weather helps doesn't it. Hope your 4 week review today goes well.

I do still feel anxious when I get into bed, and sometimes lie there for an hour or so. But I do get to sleep in the end and feel I am having decent enough nights. I feel loads better in the day too.

Hope you continue to feel better x

Hi both, hope you are ok. Been away for a few days hence not being on-line. Couple of points.....Getdown - my other half did the night feeds for ages too and I was v nervous about taking over. I started doing every other night and then took them over completely. I now feed and then go straight back to sleep. Took a while but you will get there and not get any anxiety around doing it. Poppypops - saw your other post too. Please don't worry I had days like this too. You will take steps forwards and backwards. Just enjoy the feeling that you're def getting better and don't worry when the anxiety creeps back. I wasn't 100% better until I had been on then for nearly 3 months. Please please don't worry xxx

Morning Alicia, thanks for your message. I have got another app with a different GP this morning. They must hate when they see my name pop up. Feel guilty about booking another app and wasting GP time. The GP I saw yesterday really didn't put my mind at rest, although, not really sure what I wanted him to say anyway! Reassurance that I am on the correct dose or something I suppose.

Really feel silly for saying this but I felt like he was judging me for needing AD'S and sleeping tablets. I left feeling weak and guilty. I know I am reading to much into it but that's how I feel.

He started off doing my little boys 8 week check and said 'he is bottle fed, right?' I said no breast. He really annoyed me than by saying 'well done you, good choice as breast is best'!

I know you said it took you 3 months to feel full benefits of 50mg but within that time did you question if they were really going to work and if you needed to increase your dosage?

Feel really guilty as I took half a sleeping tablet again last night. I have been doing really well not taking them but feel like I have slipped backwards a few steps. I have a horrible cold at the moment so not sure if that has affected me. Sorry to ramble on in different directions. Hope you had a nice few days away x x

Hi there, yes I did worry about the dose not being right and I did get anxiety when in the ads for a whike - esp when I had a cold :) Dr sounds awful! Completely ignore him. I was so lucky that my psyc was so understanding and made me smile when I had exactly the same worries as you have now. He kept telling me not to worry and to give it time and he was right. If I were you I'd stay on this dose for a while longer as you are doing exactly the same as I did and I'm 100% better now. I promise you it will all be ok and all the anxiety will go. I don't even have any scars from the whole experience now. I know how hard it is but just hold onto the fact that all will be well! At your stage I had booked a night nanny to look after Tom in the night cause I was still a bit bonkers. My other half cancelled it as soon as he got home! Makes me smile now to think about it but I was just looking for anything to help me - like you are with the docs. Be strong and believe in yourself. Not long now :) xxxx

Hi poppy sorry you're still not feeling quite 100% but sounds like you are doing really well, try not to be too discouraged. The path to recovery is a rocky one, as alicia says sometimes it will be two steps forward one step back. How did it go at the GP?

I am feeling quite a lot better, I think I'm on the right dose. It does still worry me a bit about the medication because I am still bfeeding DS during the day (not at night, when he has formula), but the psychiatrist knows I am bfeeding and she didn't think it was a problem. We worry about everything though don't we?!

I do still get anxious when lying awake in bed, and it's quite annoying as I can feel my heart pounding I would like to just be able to fall asleep quickly and easily, but I just have to be patient and accept things the way they are at the moment,. And I am just trying to enjoy one good day at a time at the moment and try not to worry to much into the future. It's a discipline for me not to worry. Just seems worry is second nature to me and am having to try and learn a new way of approaching life!

Hope you start feeling loads better soon. Alicia is totally right, all will be well, you just have to hold on for now. Lots of love xx

Hi Alicia and Getdown, doctors app went well. She was lovely and very understanding. Think that is all I needed really. She wasn't happy to increase my dose at the moment as she thinks 4 weeks is too soon. You were right Alicia :0. She did however give me another prescription for zopiclone after I had a wobbly about only having 7 left and I am away for 2 weeks from the weekend. I don't plan on using them but view them as my fail safe if all goes up the creek.

I am so pleased you continue to improve Getdown. I know what you mean, I too am such a worrier. As my mum so nicely put it ' I wouldn't be happy if I had nothing to worry about'.

Hope you both have a good night. Thanks for being so supportive. It is draining needing so mush reassurance. xxx

It's a pleasure. Have a good hols. We are also going on hols :) can't wait x

hi alicia,

do you have number i can call.i just need someone to tell me that i will be ok.im going through such a hard time right now:(