Home visit

[fluffydressinggown]

I am feeling very very low and I have spoke to my therapist today about it, he has referred me to a home visit team. What does this involve? I am a bit scared. They will ring me within 24 hours to make an appointment.

Thank you for your kind replies on this thread, much appreciated.

I think you've done brilliantly for hanging in there over the past few days - while your illness leaves you feeling very hopeless, I think there are a good few positives you should remember :- you have been able to seek support here to help you over the past few days while waiting for your visit, you have been able to control the desire to cut, the crisis team member was very nice - I"m sure they will understand that you do not wish to talk when they visit, (perhaps when you get to know them better this might change). They will visit every day to keep you safe and you are on the road to recovery.... And we are here in cyberspace rooting for you!

I only haven't cut because my husband is here. I have never felt so unsafe and unwell. I am struggling so much. I am so scared about everything.

I am a teacher and I am worried that this is the end of my career (only doing supply at the moment and not working much these days).

Fluffy, hope you had an ok night.

You are brilliant for making contact and having the home visit team come to you.

Be as honest as you can with them so they can support you properly.

I am guessing they will review your medication as its obviously not doing the trick at the minute as you are so sad.

As far as career goes, it's about how you are when you're well (and that you can see that you're unwell).

I know someone who had similar worries when they were sectioned, but after they recovered it was ok.

Hi.
I didn't sleep well and keep thinking of different ways to kill myself. I am finding it hard to focus and concentrate because these feelings are all encompassing. My husband is at work tomorrow and I am worried about what I will do tomorrow.

Fluffy- would dh take a day off work to be with you tomorrow? i really don't think you should be on your own. I hope the visit goes ok, i'm sure the team will be very understanding. My 19 year old step son had a break down a few weeks ago and the mental health team have been a great help and were very understanding, he's now having home visits and is on the mend (with therapy and medication), the mental health team will probably want to speek to you alone anyway to get a full picture on how you are feeling.

I used to self harm as a teen (would cut myself quite badly), i think i needed to see the damage i was doing so the more i bled the more i felt i had done damage. I am now 30 and have not self harmed for for 12 years and havn't felt the need to. You can come out at the other end of this, things will improve, let the mental health teem help you and follow their advice.

They are coming at 3.30 to see me today.

I want DH to go to work so I can do whatever I want to myself. I wish he was out of the equation so it wouldn't matter.

I have self harmed at 19, 24 and 27 :( I am so fed up of everything.

Good luck for your home visit, hopfully they can offer some extra support and they may even be able to explain things a bit better to your husband so he can be more understanding.

I know you don't want to go to hospital, the thought of going must be scary for you but a break away from you husband and life at home may help, my step son has been in and out of a open unit/hospital for 3 weeks and i have to say 'it was so different than i expected it to be', he was able to have daily therapy sessions, able to pop to the shops if he wanted and could be monitered whilst they got his medication correct, plus it gave him a break from everything that was going on at home. He's now at home and is improving every day.

I do hope something good comes out of the home visit and you get extra support, things will get better.

Thank you for your thoughts Marne, I am really scared about hospitals.

One of the people coming is a social worker, why would I need to see a social worker? I own my own house (and it is well kept) and my husband earns enough to support us financially and I don't want to do any further training or anything. Why would they need to see me?

It's because the teams are made up of different professionals, nurses, social workers, occupational therapists, psychologists and medics.

It'll just be because they are on duty rather than because anyone thinks you 'need' a social worker - they do a lot of generic work in these teams (IMVHO).

Ok that makes sense. I am sorry for being so thick about everything, this has made me feel very frightened. When you think of social workers you think of them doing child protection or helping old ladies into sheltered accommodation!

What will happen if I tell them I am seriously considering killing myself tomorrow?

They will listen to you and work with you to see what might help - it's definitely worth telling them.

upwardsandonwards I really appreciate your replies on here, you have been very thoughtful and explained things really well to me :)

Social workers are there to help, we were told to phone a sw when dss was really bad, in the end we phoned the crisis team but a sw can help also with mental health isues by helping to arrange the approriate help for you.

I hope you manage to tell them how you are feeling and then can help you.

Fluffy, how did your visit go this afternoon? I'm sorry I wasn't logged on earlier to answer your questions. Have you managed to tell the team of your thoughts about wanting to kill yourself? I do hope you've managed to share this with them. If you haven't, there's still time to do so. They might suggest a short in - patient stay as a voluntary patient. This would only be suggested if you all felt that you needed more support than your dh and the team can offer. I think Marne has offered some really positive feedback regarding her son's experience of an in-patient admission.
Upwardsdownwards is right about the reason a social worker is visiting. All teams are multidisciplinary and while each profession offers their own individual skills, they all work together as a team which involves some generic working such as a duty rota for assessments and visits.
Please be reassured that your current period of ill health certainly does not mean the end of your career. Your career in fact supports your recovery; doing agency work is helpful as it means you have more flexibility than you would in a permanent position. You can ask to speak to the Occupational Therapist on the team for reassurance in this regard (or ask here and I'll try to answer!)
Please let us know how your visit went.

They visited and I felt like it was really negative :( They said that it might make me worse and I didn't look like I wanted to engage. I feel like nobody can hear me and how worried I am. They are ringing tonight and visiting tomorrow.

I have told them that I have a plan and I have told them that I am scared I will do it as usually when I make a plan I do it. I feel compelled to do this and i want someone to help stop me but they just said I might self harm for the rest of my life. I don't want to do that. They were nice and said we would take it day by day but I felt like they felt I was wasting their time.

Ugh.

So sorry it didn't go as well as expected, did they speak to your husband? I'm sure they know that you are not wasting their time, their job is to help you and support you. Is your husband still going to work tomorrow? will you be on your own? (i really don't think he should leave you on your own). It may take a few visits from the mental health team before they get a good picture of whats going on, please make sure you tell them everything (how you are feeling and the thoughts to self harm).

If you find yourself alone tomorrow then please come on here and talk to us (i will be around tomorrow and i'm sure others will be too).

My husband is going to work. I don't want him around. It is so difficult. I love him so much but I can't bare to be with him at the moment :( I wish he could forget all about me.

He also has a job where he has training responsibilities and he is currently leading a new project so he does need to be there. There is also a promotion coming up so he needs to be in and working to be 'seen'.

Fluffy, they certainly won't have thought you were wasting their time. They will have worked with clients who have had similar difficulties before. Have you told them about your thoughts last night to kill yourself as I think it's vital that you let them know. Would it be easier for you to write down how you are feeling and let them read it if you find talking about it difficult?
Please believe me when I say that things will get better for you. I believe that you can get better, that you can learn more positive coping strategies for dealing with difficult times in your life and that just because self harm has been a strategy that has become comfortable for you in the past, it doesn't mean that you cannot let it go and free yourself of it in the future.

I told them my plans yes, I don't think they care tbh. I am hoping that if I cut myself deep enough tomorrow it will kill me.