my psychiatrist has poisoned my baby

[Scheherezade]

My psychiatrist gave me an ultimatum; 1) stop breastfeeding and take lithium as we know it works, 2) continue breastfeeding and take quetiapine as it is safe, 3) be admitted to the mother & baby unit.

So I duly start on the quetiapine, only to discover that it is NOT safe to breastfeed on, that all the drug info on internet says not to bf on it, that it does pass into the infants bloodstream, but that there are no known effects.

I feel cheated and lied to, and so so so angry. But I'm afraid to confront her, in case she tries to admit me.

How long have you been on quetiapine?

How old is your baby?

Of the 3 options given, which do you prefer? Or is there another option you'd feel comfortable with / agree to, and if so, what is it?

You sound so upset. So sorry to hear about your worries. How old is your DC?

How is your relationship with your psychiatrist normally? Do you like her? Do you trust her otherwise?
Could you not confront her, but tell her about how worried you are?

You could look at it another way: your baby need a well mother. The safest way that we currently know of is Quetiapine, so this is what she suggested.
There are lots of medicines where the best current knowledge can say 'no known effects'. Yes, there might be a risk, but none is known, whereas the risk of an unwell mother is a huge one for any baby.

Please be kind to yourself and I really hope you are better very soon.

Thanks for your quick replies. I was on 200mg for 3 weeks. He's 18 weeks (4 months). Bf is really, really important to me, I can't stop.

I'm not very unwell, I just get really anxious and worried about his health (hence why bf means so much) and why this feels so bad. She is obviously aware of my "issues" so I can't believe she would do this.

Fwiw - you sound very upset (not surprising), and are using quite emotive language (poisoned my baby, confront her, etc).

Could you not simply say calmly - 'Ive done some research online, and I am concerned about what I've discovered which seems different to what we discussed. Can we please talk about it, and explore if there are other, better options?"

I don't know any other option :( I can't go in as I can't afford to pay anyone to walk my.dog.

Is there a way you can speak to your psychaitrist by phone?
Ring her secretary and set up a time you can call again to speak to her or that she can phone you.

Really, truly, try not to think of it as 'poisoning', but as taking potentially lifesaving medication.

You are a good mother; the simple fact you are worrying about this shows that. However, make a conscious, deliberate effort to not let this get out of proportion and make you iller.

I think internet searches are unreliable. No drug is ever listed as safe in pregnancy or breastfeeding, because they can't ethically run studies. However what they do is keep a note of all cases where a drug is used. There are no known effects, means in all the year it has been moved.

I think you need to talk to her, you are upset and anxious, which may be a sympton. My ds was ff for this reason, and so will my next dc so I can go back on lithium. Your baby needs a well mum.

You could try the cinamon trust for the dog if you are going into hospiatl they may have someone or be able to point you in the right direction..

here

I had post partum psychosis and was prescribed olanzapine as it was ' safe'. After doing some googling i wasnt 100% happy it was ok to take so i stopped BF. I wasnt happy but my health was very poor at the time and i wasnt really equipped to make that decision. I have since emailed the BFN and they have pharmacists that are BF specialists that research for you and reply quite promptly with advice. They are experts in BF and drug interactions so i would trust their advice and in retrospect there was no need to stop BF. Please do email them and see what they advise. This is the drugs in breastmilk helpline run by a volunteer pharmacist 0844 412 4665 alternatively email them [email protected]

Hope this helps

this should help too

izzy, you beat me to it

The breastfeeding is keeping me well, it keeps me bonded with my baby, the natural release of oxytocin keeps me calm. Tbh I'd die before giving him ff (no offence meant, just my personal choice).

I'm scared to ring her, she'll be in tomorrow. I'm seeing my CPN on Tuesday.

I just feel like I can't win, I feel like my diet is so bad bf is probably bad for him, that I spend so much time indoors I'm vitamin d deficient and he'll be in pain from rickets. My whole life.atm is just feeling trapped by bad options.

I've already spent some time in the MBU, its a good place, but not practical.

Sorry, lots of replies as I was typing mine. Will look at the links thanks

Have you checked it out in the LactMed database? It doesn't look like there are any known effects in the baby:

toxnet.nlm.nih.gov/cgi-bin/sis/search/f?./temp/~nz15dL:1

Your diet won't affect your milk - though maybe a vitamin supplement is a good idea if you aren't getting out much?

Sorry no advice re the medication but just a thought - is your dog insured? Most policies will pay for your dog to be cared for in a boarding kennels should their owner need hospitalisation. Worth checking your policy document if you have insurance.

It's probably too late isn't it. He's 4 months, the damage will be done.

Sorry, hope I'm not accused of drip feeding or anything.

I really think you should call or email the BFN before panicking any further. They are best placed to advise you we are not.

I agree, check the actual risks. Quetiapine will not be recommended in breastfeeding because no-one is ever going to do a trial on it for that (just like most other drugs). That doesnt make it dangerous. Quetiapine has been around for a while now, and there is quite a lot of experience now in its effects in pregnancy and BF.

What damage?
Do you have concerns about how he is right now?

Really, even from just a few sentences read from a computer screen, you make it so clear how disproportionately worried this is making you.
Look at him. I bet he is just perfect. And you are the Centre of his Universe. He needs you, and he needs you well.

Just another question: are you better now than you were? Do you feel Quetiapine has helped you?

I hope you feel you can talk about this with your CPN.

What damage to you think will be done?

A psychiatrist is not gong to prescribe something with carries a significant risk of harm to a baby. The likelihood is that they have weighted up the options and this is the safest.

It sounds to me like you are not coping very well in general and your worries are actually disproportionate to the risks. Maybe discussing it with your CPN would be helpful and they might be able to take some of your concerns to the psychiatrist.

Re: vitamin D, in the unlikely case that he's vit.D deficient, a supplement for you or for him (I'm not sure if it's ok now or from 6 months-maybe PacificDogwood will know) will fix it. So you really don't need to worry about rickets just yet. There's also something called Uvedose (here in France-don't know the name of it in the UK) which is a mega dose of vit.D-he'll be too young for it, but it could be an answer for you as it will get rid of any deficiency quicker then the drops. If you're worried you can have a blood test to check for vit.D levels.