how is best to stop drinking

[woahthere]

I think that I am an alcoholic of sorts, albeit a very high functioning one. I really want to stop drinking. I drink a whole bottle of wine most nights, and sometimes then have a few beers. I drink it in a very short space of time. However, I still get up and work everyday from 8 - 6, and keep a clean house, and look after my 3 children. Everyone who knows me say what a great Mum I am, but I know I drink, way, way too much. I am worried about the health effects mainly. I have been saying to my self and my partner for the past 2 years, I must stop/cut back etc. I cant do it, there is always a reason to drink...happy, sad, celebrate, comiserate, achieved lots today, have a glass of wine, did a great workout, deserve a glass of wine. When I go out with friends we drink until blind. How do people stop. Im quite frightened to go to the doctors in case it is held against me in the future if I have to have a medical or anything. The thing is as well, I hardly know of anyone that doesnt drink a lot like me but none of them seem to think of themselves as a lcoholics, we often joke about how much we drink and yet we are grown women with good careers and children, but what I drink isnt normal is it? I actually keep finding myself putting off giving up because I have friends coming over or whatever, the thought of saying Im not drinking is a bit scary!

Well done for posting about this - the first step taken!

I have totally no experience (have my own demons though) but I wondered if you knew about the fabulous long running Brave Babes thread

They support each other brilliantly

I cut down by drinking spritzers, with spirits/champagne etc. for special occasions only because I was putting on weight. It worked and I don't remember any odd comments.
When I had to stop drinking altogether because of meds, it was no problem at all.
Worth a try?

thanks, i have been told about the brave babes thread but couldnt find it, or remember what it was called but I did know there was one supporting people. I dont think Iam capable of just cutting down shodatin, I have tried many times over the years, Ive got no self control when it comes to alcohol, once ive had one it all goes out the window and I drink and drink and drink.

I used to drink really large amounts, either when out with mates or even when in the house alone. I would drink till I passed out.
I drank cans of larger and lots of them.

I used to worry a lot about this, I thought it would kill me one day but like you did not know how to stop or wasn't even sure I wanted to?

Then something changed in me and I just decided enough was enough, I stopped pretty much over night. Now, 6 years on I do not drink at all - something I never ever thought I would say! It is also one of the thing's I am most proud of, I feel a LOT happier being sober.

Must admit round about the same time I met my partner and moved down South, to London. I did live in the North East previously.
I think this also helped, I don't know where you live, but I do know the North has (in my opinion) a lot bigger drinking culture than down South...

I don't think any of this will help you unfortunately, I just wanted to share it with you. x

I do understand about the first one, woahthere, learned this when stopping cigarettes!
Have you considered AA to stop completely? One of my family joined years ago, and I think it's impressive. You don't even have to give your first name, or say anything, unless you want to, and of course they have lots of ideas to stay off the stuff, but not everybody wants to stop.

the thought of AA just fills me with horror shodatin sorry. What if you saw someone you knew?!I have given up smoking as well so I know I have willpower. The thing is drinking isnt particularly seen as a nasty habit whereas smoking is. Thank you for your input ell...I live down South actually so its not that! Did you have a moment when you turned round to your friends and said..Im not drinking anymore because I have a problem with it. Actually it probably doesnt matter, I drink at home more than I do out with mates! I didnt drink last night and to my shame I had shakes, felt sick, was going hot and cold. I thought I must be ill but then realised it was probably because I hadnt had a drink. I had an absolute horror of nights, was seeing things, not really sleeping properly, then when i did sleep I was having sleep paralysis and horrific dreams. I feel quite teary today, probably just tired though.

I can tell you about my experience. I was drinking at a similar level to you and with the same sort of relationship with drink (have never been able to have just 1). I decided that enough was enough, I wasn't even particularly enjoying it, was just drinking out of habit. Every morning I'd think "not tonight" and every evening I'd drink a bottle of wine (maybe more).

I decided to just stop and that's what I did, 1.5 years ago, and I don't miss it at all. I also gave up smoking about 5 years ago, I read allen carr and the arguments that he uses about smoking apply to drinking as well I think. So I knew the right "mindset" from giving up the fags.

The one thing I would advise against is seeking help which is not anonymous. I spoke to the GP and it was a mistake. But anon helplines etc may help. Or maybe you can just stop, it's not as hard as stopping smoking IME.

I read an interesting article by virginia ironside recently which chimed with me and I like to share it: here

There are a lot of people on MN who know a lot about this too, I gave up with their support and they are all fab I expect some of them will be along soon!

You do sound like you need and are ready to stop.The withdrawal you are suffering is quite normal and short lived iirc with dp.It is the 'just can't have one' that rings alarm bells.Perhaps give up for a month and see how you feel.Make no plans for that month in terms of socialising and be kind to yourself.Eat really well and take to bed early etc until the first week is over.Some people find the new clarity and feeling of 'wellness' a real incentive and almost an addiction itself!Good luck.I have spoken many times on here about dp and if you want to PM me for any advice feel free x

If you do stop then you need to supplement with B vits. You can buy from boots or alternatively eat plenty of toast with marmite!

When I say you "need" to, I don't mean it literally, just that it might be helpful while your body gets used to the idea.