i want to kill myself

[Misshousehunter]

I was so close to hurting my child today. He has pushed and pushed me to the edge. He pinches, scratches, bites etc.. and he means it when he does it. My 2.5 year old hates me. I'm a shit mother. He always hurts his sister too, she's 12 months. He's evil. I can see the devil in his eyes and I'm starting to hate him and I'm wanting to hurt him. I visualise how I'm gonna hurt him. Sometimes I want him to run in the road and get hit by the,next car.

I want to die I seriously want to die. My child is evil and I am to blame cos I'm a shit mum.

Hobgoblin - I think she needs an assessment. CMHT best placed to do that - but she can still get family therapy if needed.

Just thinking that whilst waiting for CMHT she could use money spent on nursery to get some targeted support rather than removing the problem by placing child in nursery.

Also CMHT is, in my area at least, not the service it ought to be in that it has become a vessel for securing ADHD diagnoses and so on and infrequently about practical behavioural support.

Parentline a good idea but you have to be functioning quite confifdently I think to convert advice into action. It sounds as though OP might struggle. Similarly with parenting courses, they are great but impersonal and rely on the parent being in a fairly okay place to ebgin with to put the learning into action.

This is just my personal opinion from experience as both parent course facilitator and behaviour consultant privately and also dealings with CAMHS professionally and CMHT personally and professionally. Sorry just realised I have confused CMHT with CAMHS in my thinking Both useful but maybe not immediate enough.

I think she needs a RISK assessment urgently and the CMHT can see same day. No need to wait.

yes maybe. in reality though that would require her to be very honest indeed or for someone close to her to be