Hello! Well it's the eve of my first fast day anniversary and I can't believe I'm here.
Where to start? I've crashed dieted since my teens (even though I was slim!), but regardless of how much I weighed I never felt in control of my eating. Sugar has always been my weakness and I'd gorge on cakes, chocolate and biscuits. I never felt like I was any good at sports, so never joined in at school.
When I was losing weight it was like I was underwater holding my breath; I knew I could only hold out so long. When I was putting on weight, it was like I was free falling; I couldn't stop.
In my early twenties I had a terrible body image. I used to hear "I'm fat, I'm ugly and I hate myself" on a loop, in my head. Others would often make snide comments about my weight too. Looking back, I wasn't even that big!
Things started to change when I fell pregnant. After having a body like an Easter egg, I swore that when my pregnancy I'd never moan about my body again! I stopped hating my body. I stopped putting myself down and made the best of what I had. If anyone dared comment on my weight I would have bitten their head off, but they never did.
I started eating sensibly and joined some local exercise classes. Soon I was down to my pre-pregnancy weight.
Then I fell pregnant with DD2 and when I was 6 months pregnant my Dad died suddenly. To make it worse, my mum had not long been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. My husband works away from home for weeks at a time, so I had little support. I bottled things up and put on a brave face, but I wasn't coping at all. And so I ate! After the birth of DD2 I was a size 16-18.
I finally admitted I wasn't coping and went for counselling, where I dealt with losing my dad, my issues with my mum, and finally, my eating.
I started to have a much more positive relationship with food and lost a little bit of weight. Weight Watchers helped me lose 9lb, but as Xmas approached I knew it wouldn't last.
By chance I came across fasting on MN and thought it was much more feasible long term and I was impressed with the health benefits. I then started exercising, just brisk walking at first, then HIIT, weight training and boxercise.
This week, for the first time in my LIFE I've had no sugar, sweeteners or caffeine. A year ago, this would have been impossible!
I don't stick to healthy eating all the time, in fact there have been fortnights and even a whole month when I haven't fasted at all and indulged, but I always know I'll come back to fasting and after a few fasts I'm back on track.
I've lost 2 and a half stone and gone from a 16-18 to a size 12!
I remember reading this thread when I first started and feeling so desperate, hoping that fasting would work for me. I've never stuck at any slumming or diet plan for longer than a couple of months, but for me fasting is for life.
My weight loss journey isn't over yet, but I'm proud of how far I've come. If I can do it, anyone can!