Music Specialist School Discussion

[Kutik73]

Sorry, this is rather long…

We’d never considered specialist school route for our musical DS, especially at such a tender age (he is Y6). However, we’ve recently started seeing it could be an option in possibly near future.

The state secondary school DS is supposed to start from September has good reputation with a wide range of extracurricular activities and music is one of their strengths. However, they also hand out heavy amount of academic work daily, and basically keep their pupils pretty busy. Keeping teens busy could be a good thing, especially for those who may get in trouble or glue themselves to screen otherwise. But DS loves music and he likes to immerse himself in music more, but in reality, he’ll have less time for such freedom once he starts secondary school. The additional journey time is another thing. It takes 45 mins to get there, whereas it’s only 5-10 mins currently.

A friend suggested we could see specialist school as a small private school with strong music activities rather than a place where all DCs were aiming to be professional musicians.

Her logic is, the class size is a lot smaller than the state secondary school so pupils get more attention hence learn more efficiently, all the while there is no compromise in music studies. DCs who are keen to keep up academic work on top will manage to get good enough GCSE results for decent sixth form if they decide to pursue other than music for A level/uni. Although sixth form seems the most popular (and sensible) time to join specialist school, KS3 is actually the best time because if DCs change their mind on course, it’s easier for them to return to ‘normal education’ possibly at sixth form with good enough academic record and musical ability strong enough to be a music scholarship material. But if they stay focused on music and in fact decide to take it seriously, starting early will only become beneficial. Though, it depends on circumstance of course, and instrument. DS plays violin/piano for instance - hence early start can be rather important.

However, I heard and read some scary stories about music specialist school while I was researching. Some claimed they felt like they were living in a prison, some expressed unhappiness (even though they recognised the benefit and appreciated their fortunate position), some teachers talked about very able young musicians going to specialist school as a huge mistake, etc…

DS innocently expresses strong desire to go to music specialist school. I, as a parent, wish him happiness more than anything. By accepting his desire and letting him go where he says he likes to go, am I pushing him into a harsh and scarily competitive world unnecessarily? Or, like my friend suggested, it could be a lot more flexible than I may have been thinking and in fact could be good alternative KS3 education for musical and academic DCs?

Any thoughts/knowledge/experience would be greatly appreciated…

Thanks, Paul, Double and claraschu. DS is over the moon. It's his dream school. He (and we) wouldn't dream of us in this situation just a couple of weeks ago... I was still tossing around the idea of applying. Life is interesting....

I always thought music school must be more selective than jds. But if DS could get in, that mean most of DCs at DS's jd would get in, as he is 'very normal' there - doing well but not particularly exceptional. So the decision is on us than the school... Maybe so obvious but I didn't think that way before.

I'm not sure that's necessarily the case Kutik, some JD's are more selective than others...

What does Mr Kutik think of it all? Does he have a clear preference?

Right, life is not easy...

DS's former violin teacher was delighted by the news. His DC is at the school too and kids know each other.

DS's current teacher was not keen... She was delighted by the 'achievement' but kind of persuaded me not to sent him there... She said 'don't put all the eggs in one basket. He is still too young.'

....

I said to her they do well academically so nothing should be fixed really. But she still said 'no, sending him there at this young means you are putting all his eggs in not only music, but in one instrument - violin. Life is long. What if he injured and couldn't play any more. What is he going to do?'

'They don't do triple science and they don't do Latin, they don't do team sports like cricket and hockey....'

'Send him to normal school, let his music keep going by waking up early and so on. Lots of academic children become a fine musician just an hour a day/ 6 days a week practice. He can manage.'

Maybe she just wants to keep him Kutik???

Kutik

It's the same as dd school, like I posted above. What does it matter if the child is happy and yours will get to do his sport on a Saturday.

She is right it's putting all your eggs in one basket for a while, but your ds knows what he wants to do, if he is like my dd wild horses wouldn't stop him.

Maybe, in their own way the teacher is playing devils advocate which ime was good and served us well. There wasn't anything we weren't really aware of when we started.
Or the teacher may just be a cynic and not wanting to lose your ds as a pupil.

That's where many get it wrong I'm afraid. Yes, you can do well with just one hour practice a day, but it takes much more practice to become a reputed musician.
Even rank and file in orchestras are past jd and conservatoire students.
When you are looking at becoming professional, or world renowned you are looking at 4+ hours a day.
Mine is expected to do more practice during the holidays than term time as there is more time due to no academic classes.
So she will do 2 hours first study, one hour second study and 2 hours 3rd study, as advised, throughout the holiday.

I agree with Gilly - everyone will have their views but take it in, consider and use it to test your thinking. The right answer for your family will pop out 😀 and def agree re practice etc - for strings building finger strength etc take much time now. Dd’s Teacher told her today an hour enough is not right anymore 2-3 hrs building to 3-4 are needed for cello. She may be being rather extreme but I take her general point that there may be a choice to be made. Not that we are aiming for the world stage but if dd was and had that talent then I would def be considering alternative routes

Kutik I have been chewing on this for my car journey. I only know you all in the virtual world, but fwiw here are my thoughts.

You are not putting all his eggs in one basket. Not one bit. There is no time limit on academic achievement- my extremely intelligent cousin (deliberately) flunked School and later went back abc now has 3 undergrad degrees and is half way through a PhD. As you have said, children change their direction and leave the school to go back to 'normal' academic life with the Head's support.

Mini Kutik has driven this, right from the start. As you said, it's his 'dream school'. And for those that argue how can a 10yr old know what they want, my 10yr old musician (admittedly not as advanced) is not banging on at me about music school!! Now that he has the place, what would the consequences be for your relationship if you say he can't go??

I really think fate takes a hand in these situations. The way everything happened, (no spaces, send in video, come for trial, oh look we found a space!) I genuinely think this is the path he is meant to be on. And if it's not, nothing is permanent.

Those 'capable' musicians that got by on an hours practice a day... just think what they might have been with 3-4 hrs per day in a specialist environment!! If Music is to be Mini Kutik's life (and who knows the answer to that right now!!) this would give him the absolute best chance xx

Some claimed they felt like they were living in a prison, some expressed unhappiness (even though they recognised the benefit and appreciated their fortunate position), some teachers talked about very able young musicians going to specialist school as a huge mistake, etc…

Every year a number of children are assessed out, this is quite often best for the child and the tax payer
It's a catch 2 situation, whilst the schools take children with potential, sooner or later they have to realise this potential.
If their heart isn't in it and they aren't bouncing to a practice room, because they see practice as a chore they need encouraging or cajoling to do, they won't last long.
They expect far more as you move up the school and some children can't cope with it, in fairness they are boot camps for musicians.
It doesn't matter if they come in at grade 8 or no grades taken at all, grades aren't really considered as a mark of improvement, more of an additional. They do take grades but they aren't seen as important.
You can have a grade 5 student working at undergrad level in some aspects.
DD said it's regularly stated that grade 8 if they have it is the starting point to begin study

I agree with folk .

Also, I would say that six very very long days a week (week days with full day at secondary school + super early practice + long commute, followed by j.d. on Saturday) is not impossible. Many of our children will do similar. But it is a tough life and mini- kutik will probably be happier in his ‘dream school’.

If he is academic, and he decides music is not for him, he will easily catch up in 6th form or uni. Believe me, as a university academic, I have seen students from all sorts of backgrounds flourish at different ages. For example, one of our highest flying post doctoral researchers was an international level gymnast, who had a very limited school education (much more limited than at specialist music school!). When she retired, age 18, she quickly picked up high A levels at a sixth form college and is now on her way to being a successful academic. The self discipline she learnt in the gym has served her well.

When considering this problem, you need to consider the risks both sides (of going and of not going) and the opportunities. It is not a given that mini- kutik will get this opportunity again, and in time he may resent that he didn’t go.

Thanks all. Lots to think about... We don't have much time though as summer holiday is fast approaching...

Congratulations Kutik, it sounds as if the decision won't be as difficult as you first thought.

We had this too Kutik, from dd’s teacher and head of local music service and head of her primary school.
I ignored all, as it was what dd wanted. I’m not saying I didn’t have any doubts at all, but I can say that it was definitely the best decision- she went, and she’s as happy as anything.
I would go on what mini-Kutik wants and what you feel will make him the happiest.
Others may think they know what’s best for him- but only you, mini-Kutik and your husband will know that.

It's good you have the voices of caution. On the other hand I think from your DS's point of view he's just been offered a place at Hogwarts and you're not going to get very far telling him he might not want a career in magic.

One thing stuck out - I gave up Latin at normal secondary school because I wanted more time for music practice. We also didn't have a triple science option. Neither of these hindered my academic career in the slightest. Your DS may well end up making academic compromises for music wherever he goes, from what you've said so far they don't seem like huge ones.

I was a very musical child. I had Grade 8 recorder, Grade 5 violin/piano/oboe by 11. I was obsessed by music, had perfect pitch, did nothing but music, all driven by me.

I begged my mum NOT to send me away to music school because I was an incredibly anxious/homesick/sensitive kid (probably undiagnosed SPD) and couldn't cope with the thought of boarding.

As secondary school progressed, I suddenly found myself hating being put in the musician box, and wanting other things. I did do Music at Oxford eventually, but hated the degree and wished I'd done languages or politics/psychology. I hated practising by that stage, too (not a perfectionist!).

It's just another perspective I suppose. Good luck with your decision!

Oh kutik - it's a difficult decision of course.

But ultimately no-one has a crystal ball - it's impossible to say what will happen in the future and whatever you choose at this point you may end up having regrets. Everyone will have a different experience to share - some positive, some negative but of course what is best for others might not be the best for your DS and your family.

It seems to me that your DS will have more regrets if he is not allowed to follow his dream at this point. And as you have already identified, it will be easier in the future for him to move from the specialist music path to a different one (should he ultimately decide to go a different way) than it would to try to move from a more mainstream choice to a specialist one.

Good luck with whatever you decide!

Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. It's been so so helpful hearing many voices - negative, positive, all of them. As some of you pointed, no one has a crystal ball, and eventually we just have to decide what we believe best for DS. Whatever we decide nothing will be permanent. Things are adjustable.

We may be making a bad choice. But I feel DS deserves a chance to taste what he fought so hard to obtain. What kind of life lesson I may end up giving him if we say 'no' to him after all this...

Yaaaay! Go family kutik!!

Your DS will shine kutik - whatever path he ultimately decides on in the future

Japanese

ShackUp, DS loves music, and he seems to think of music all the time (unconsciously though) such as playing some musical games, figuring out things he just heard, etc - it's all just fun for him. But he is not as obsessed as you were. He does lots other things. That's what the teacher pointed. She said a child like him who has many other interests should not be thrown in such intensive environment. I wonder if she would have agreed if DS had been like you.

By the way, people often mistake DS has perfect pitch. Even the violin teacher thought he had. But he doesn't. He just has a very very good relative pitch - all learnt not born with it.

After a few serious discussion, let's have a bit of laugh.

What if he injured and couldn't play any more. What is he going to do?

Something else then, just like all the other children do that don't have a grand passion. They take some GCSEs, maybe some A levels, maybe a degree and wander off into the world. The lack of Latin is not going to close many doors to him.

If we started with "what if" then no-one would ever do anything. What if I was struck by a bus crossing the road, what if a piano fell on my head, what if - well you get the picture. No-one knows what tomorrow will bring, you just have to make the best decision you can today. If it later turns out to be the wrong one then you can usually change it later.

Personally, I've always firmly believed it's better to regret something you HAVE done than something you WISH you had done....

What if he injured and couldn't play any more. What is he going to do?

I know someone who has a daughter who was a talented swimmer, with all those early morning sessions. Unfortunately an injury in a PE lesson at school put an end to her dreams. She's picked herself up and got on with other plans.

Enjoy this special time Kutic

Well done Kutik! What an opportunity!

Love the perfect pitch youtube btw! That was me trying to teach the DCs aural, bellowing, ‘can’t you HEAR it’s a D?’ I’m sure they would have loved to beat me to a pulp with a pillow... I’ll show it to DS2 tomorrow!

Those guys are so funny. For more light relief: