December Music Thread

[Wafflenose]

Have a new thread for December!

This is an ongoing chat group for musicians, parents of musicians and anyone interested in music. We talk about practice, scales, theory, instrument hire and purchase, concerts, exams, auditions and loads more. Newcomers and beginners are extra specially welcome - yes, a lot of us now have children who are getting quite advanced, but we all had beginners once. I started the conversation when my eldest was 6 and working towards Grade 1, and we now have learners of all ages and standards on here.

I am a teacher of woodwind, and have two daughters. Goo is 12 and in Year 7. She loves her new school, and has grown up fast since she started. The first few weeks were overwhelming and confusing. She loved the challenge of new subjects, new faces, lots of different sports, etc. Unfortunately, she is a poster child for complacency, is now finding it all very easy, and doing the bare minimum again, sigh. She extends this approach to music too, putting in a bit of effort at the last minute, and often making an eleventh hour bid to change piece for important performances. She is gregarious, intense and obsessed with her phone. Oops, I forgot to say, she plays the flute and piano. Grade 8 flute is pencilled in for some time next year (teacher is campaigning to wait until train tracks come off) and she hasn't performed on the piano or taken any exams yet.

Rara is 9, and a completely different kettle of fish. She likes music, but she likes reading, art and making things even more. She's talkative, eccentric and highly creative. I have no idea how her mind works. She is in Year 5 at the village primary, and couldn't really care less about academics. She plays the cello (working at an early Grade 4 level) and clarinet. Some of her clarinet pieces are Grade 4, but she is having some technical problems at the moment, mainly due to her size and incorrect placement of her fingers. So the next exam she does will probably be Grade 3.

Both girls are members of South West Music School (Rara starting next month) and both auditioned for the NCO. Goo was very pleased with herself, but Rara had an absolute disaster. She bounced back within a day though.

Yes, first major setback for Goo I suppose.

What has hurt her is the fact that she gave the performance of her life - far better than any audition she has previously done for NCO - and didn't get back into the same orchestra as last year, with a solid audition rather than an amazing one. She has no idea how to break the news to her friends.

She isn't tough at all, but will pick herself up... eventually. Agree that she will be very different at 16.

I hope Goo knows she has such a large crowd of supporters here...

I don't think she knows.

The timing was just appalling, right as she was on a high after her first secondary school concert, performing in 7 or 8 items and playing solo (nicely) in front of hundreds of people last night. I hope she can hold on to all the lovely feedback she got for that, which was then overshadowed by the unexpected news.

I think I detected a chink of self-confidence under the disappointment this morning. Here's hoping.

The timing could have been worse, it could have come just before the concert.

I heard at 1pm, and had to paste a smile on my face and stand next to her playing in the Steel Band like nothing had happened. We told her after the concert at 9pm. It was pretty hard, but she'll be OK.

It was worse then!

She will be ok waffle. She has so much going for her. Doesn't take away her immense disappointment and the various feelings post news, but I completely agree that this decision was not about her, as hard as the context of wide, quality competition vs supply is for a child to accept (straight away).

Waffle I feel for her! I am sure she'll pick herself up and this will, in the long run, make her stronger.
My middle DS got in this year with his first ever audition. He does not know what to expect really, but am sure next year will be different.
I think life is tough, there are always competitions/auditions, and part of growing up is to learn how to deal with disappointment and figuring out what works for you. These life lessons are very important and will make kids/adults resilient.
My kids also play and compete in an individual sport with only one winner at the end. I know that music is subjective and probably this makes it harder to accept.

Waffle you prob know done Goo’s friends are in same position and everyone is being really lovely and supportive. We alas have no news still.

Waffle I'm sure she'll bounce back . Ds's teacher interestingly thinks that it's as much about how you deal with setbacks ( and public mistakes when playing) as being an amazing player that dertermines who will decide the life of a muscician is for them . Ds hasn't yet had a total disaster ( but he will) and then we shall see I guess that's why I'm careful not to let him put all of his eggs in one basket and focus just on music - they are all so young ( and so so well to even audition I wouldn't have at their age - or now!!)

I think all your DC are incredibly brave for putting themselves through audition scrutiny. And possibly even tougher for those who know what they've lost if they have been successful in the past! Well done to those with successful outcomes, and I hope those reserve places come good for those narrowly missing out...

Hello everyone, I can't believe the NCO drama has to be repeated next year. I feel like DD scraped in and we should just enjoy being part of regionals, as the U11 violin competition next year will be incredible.

I do feel for Goo, and everything has been flipped on its head in the Waffle household. And Rara is a little star!

This weekend I am taking DD up to her first workshop with the Oasby Music group in Lincolnshire (have to stay overnight as a two hour trip). I think I said before there are some issues with DD's teacher and this is a new opportunity. The group posted today that they achieved 11 string pupils as full NCO members and 6 in regionals over all age ranges! It is a smallish group, so I'm very impressed. We have never had another violin teacher before, so it will be really interesting to see how things are done (obviously quite well).

Floot, I was going to say about your DS missing the boat, that it really doesn't have to be that way. DD was also a late starter in Year 3 when the school introduced violin lessons. She is now Year 5. Last year, one year after starting, I saw the NCO thread when she was just grade 2 and thought it would be impossible to catch up with all the other seriously talented minis. She went from g2 to g5 in a year with probably just under an hour a day practising. I do think it is important to have your teacher onboard though, as if they take a different approach to moving so fast it can be difficult. She played a g5 and a g6 piece for the 10s age band and at the time was a g4.

Also we did NSSO last summer which was fabulous for her and also has a week long summer residential. We will continue to do this as well.

Nigglenotes，your DD is very talent violinist, I believe she will get in U11 next year. My DD is lucky to get in U10 only because she started in year 2. In fact her progress is much slower than your DD.

Floottoot my cousin started percussion at 14yo I think and got into NYO (Wales) at 16/17yo. He had played a lot of other instruments beforehand though, and was clearly very musical from about age 4yo.

My dc play instruments at a roughly slightly better than average for their age. They love doing it and have had some great opportunities, but are nowhere near good enough for NCO. They can still enjoy it.

Niggle - enjoy Oasby; they are a fantastic group (the nco results are just one part of that, they do great performance work etc)

Thanks, Niggle and Witchend.
Ds has made fantastic progress this year - exponential. This time last year, he'd just taken grade 3, having taken grade 1 six months previously, and now he's just finished his first term as a music scholar at the best school for music in Wales and is playing at grade 6 level.
He had a lesson tonight and I had a really interesting and enlightening chat with his teacher, who has coached and moderated auditions for NCO. And I heard ds play the opening bars of the Elgar cello concerto...something I NEVER thought I'd hear! 😁😁😁

Thanks String, DD is doing an all day workshop on Sunday, ending with a performance, so I think it will be a really good introduction. Have you been involved?

Witchend, I don't know if DD is really talented. Her teacher said she has "significant talent", but she muttered this darkly, as if the talented one's very shallow mother was only interested in grades and not interested in the wider musical education. But I wanted NCO to part of her wider musical education and have so far prevailed. Now, she has put her foot down about grade 6 any time soon!

I wouldn't say your DD's progress is slower at all!

Ah, the cello concerto, Floot, one of my favourite pieces. I like to play it in the car, quite loud.

By the way, about the shallowness, about which I am not defensive at all!, I really believe everyone has one of three mediums that transports them. Music, Words, Art. I can see the interest in music well communicated, and art through medium and context, but words trump all of that. If I had to choose a medium for the rest of my days it would be words hands down. My DH, although having written two novels (about classical composers) could not ever live without music. To him, it enhances of meaning of everything.

So if DD's medium is music, I want to do what I can to put her in an environment with people who feel the same. While at the same time, not really getting it!

Niggle, I don't believe you are shallow - far from it! You clearly want to do whatever you can to support your child in their passion and no-one can argue that.
Talking generally, as an instrumental teacher, we do see parents who only want their children to do exam after exam, as a sort of box ticking exercise. Those parents ( and the pupils) stand out a mile - quite often, the child in question shows no real enthusiasm or love for music, only looks at the marks, not the comments, and can only play 3x as many pieces as the last grade they took ( because they only learn the pieces they need to learn to get through the exam!)...you get the picture.
That said, if you trust your teacher's judgement and know they have your child's best interests at heart, it can be hard if you have a particular idea of how you want things to go - you are emotionally involved in your child in a way a teacher will never be. It's hard not to feel that grades are hurdles to get over, as opposed to markers along the learning journey.

Today I treated myself with a ballet. DS went to see a ballet as part of his youth orchestra's programme (they've been working on ballet music this term) and I meant to just drop him and go. I ended up buying a returned ticket which costed me only £40 (half price) and I sat on a very nice seat, alone! DS was with his mates and instructors far away. Gosh, it was lovely....

We got home at 11pm. DS told me earlier that he was going to perform his piano piece at school tomorrow. Hopefully he won't be too sleepy during the performance!

Kutik sounds a lovely evening
Niggle I would just go for it next year for NCO even if your dd hasn't taken the exam its her playing that counts and given the progress she's made this year I'm sure she'd be in with a chance . ( oh we will see you at regionals as we can make the first 2 rehearsals )
Floot your ds has made amazing progress and I don't think he has missed the boat . Yes lots start strings early but they are still really young. a lot can change I imagine over the early high school years as some become teenagers and decide to give up and others really find their passion for music and make amazing progress. It sounds like he has a great teacher too which always helps 😀

Kutik, that sounds like a wonderful treat. Which ballet was it - something seasonal?
We went to The Red Shoes earlier in the year, which was absolutely stunning. Would love to see more next year.