Advice for a total exercise newbie

[ConfusedAndStressed95]

I am in my early 20's and I need to lose half of my body weight and I have no idea where to start. Over the past few months I have completely changed my diet and I am losing weight slowly but I really want to get fit, but I'm terrified of joining the gym or fitness classes.

My friends are gym goers and have offered to take me and show me around and work with me but I really don't want them to. I don't want them to see just how unfit I am. I'm working towards the Couch to 5k but I'm unsure about what else I could do. I used to play rugby as a teenager but I don't know if I want to go back to that type of commitment until I can run more than ten yards without feeling like I'll pass out.

I'm looking at local fitness groups but they're mainly aimed at older people and I'm not sure I'd fit in. Ideally I think I'd like to go to the gym but one that my friends don't go use. It's likely that I'd pay for a personal trainer for awhile until I know what I'm doing but I'm really afraid of sticking out like a sore thumb or having people judge me. I know I don't look massively overweight despite needing to lose so much as I 'carry it well' and that people of all shapes and sizes use the gym but it's a massive irrational fear. How do I get over this and make the seemingly minor but actually monumental step into new and better habits?

I am considering asking my fitness fanatic male friend if he'll take me to the gym with him and show me around and what I'm doing. I will feel ridiculously unfit next to him but he is one of the few people who I can relax with and feel at ease with and he can make me laugh when I'm stressed/anxious/overwhelmed and being autistic thats a big deal and really helpful because if I panic in anyway he knows how to deal with it and calm me down.

OP, that's a really good idea if you feel comfortable with him. And also you won't be so likely to compare yourself with a man (I train with a bloke and it works well). I agree with everyone else - people won't judge you. I am a rather dumpy middle-aged woman who got into exercise quite recently and have had loads of encouragement and help. Don't be afraid to try different gyms till you find one you are comfortable in. Really good luck.

I have just signed up to ladies kickboxing classes. I start on Monday morning.

Kick boxing sounds great.

Fitness builds up fast. Both my pregnancies impared my mobility with SPD to the point that I couldn't do basic functions like walking around the supermarket. By the time I'd gone through two rough births, I was rebuilding my fitness from walking less than 100m to the end of the road and back and going to bed to recover. 6 months later I was fit for mainstream classes and C25k. Second time, I started C25k when I was no longer limping and I was tired of puffing everywhere. Those 30 second runs felt like death. Then the 1 mins. Then the 3 mins... and the 5s... then before you know it, you're dying your way through 15, 20, 25 mind and 30 seconds sound easy. A year after the first run, I had a HM medal.

You are allowed to find it hard, get puffy and sweaty. Fit people find it hard, and get puffy and sweaty, but the work it takes to get to that stage changes.

Enjoy yourself

I do classes. You need to find what you enjoy. There is no point slogging at something you hate because you won't keep it up.

I'll echo that no one cares. However, if someone notices someone is doing something that might do them some damage then they might point it out. It's to help though, not trying to shame anyone.

Well done OP! I hope you enjoy the class!

OP... are you in Sheffield? You mentioned safest city in the UK, so I'm guessing you may be?

If so, get yourself a SIV membership right now. People in Ponds Forge, Hillsborough, Concord, etc are of all ages and shapes and sizes, and the range of classes is brilliant. There are people in my spin class who are very obese, and people in the same class who are pro athletes. We all work together, no judgment, just having fun and getting fit.

Also, check out Strideout running club. They're women-only, very inclusive, and do lots of absolute beginner C25k courses. Good luck!

@ShinyGiratina, that sounds rough. Congrats on being able to push through it. I hate going red and sweaty and out of breath. It's an awful sensation but I need to make a change so I'm going to push through it. If I continue the way I am I'll end up in an early grave.

@HunterHearstHelmsley, I'm hoping that this sort of class will improve my coordination because I have limited coordination at the moment. Plus I figured it was good to start with something I had done before so it's less intimidating and there may be some remnants of muscle memory there.

@Runningonempty84, close I'm in York but those classes sound fantastic. The kickboxing lessons are women only because I think I would find it too intimidating if I were working with a guy.

Today however health wise isn't great. I'm having fish and chips for dinner and then two of my housemates and one of my friends and I are having a wine and cheese night so it's a good thing I'm tracking what I eat and know what I can do to balance it out. Several days on veggie sticks to counterbalance the lack of nutrients I think.

@ConfusedAndStressed95 how was kickboxing?

@BuzzShitbagBobbly, fun but knackering. I was completely and utterly drained. Will likely go back but on a casual basis because its £100 for a six week course that starts before I'm back in the city.

Well done you!

I think the draining was as much emotional as it was physical - it is a brave thing to start something new and out of your comfort zone.

But you did it! Soon enough you will be kicking and boxing like an old pro!

Give yourself a pat on the back

It’s not adviseable to restrict food after overeating - increases risks of overeating. Better just to go back to plan and have sufficient food.

An option is to go to the gym but not with your friends: you’ll get an induction on how to use the machines etc. Tell friends offering coaching that you’d prefer not to.

Recommend podcasts for walks/jogs.

@BuzzShitbagBobbly, hopefully but it'll take awhile. I'm going to ask gym goer friends about the gyms they go to and decide which gym I feel comfortable joining.

@Loopytiles, I won't restrict food after exercising and once I'm in a proper exercise routine. Instead I'll meal plan and work out what I should and shouldn't be eating. I walk quite a lot currently and I enjoy it but it's very slow going.