Brexit Arms Festive Special. Will the Grinch steal christmas? Could it be ‘Christmas with the Kranks?’ Or will we end up with a ‘Blue’ Christmas after all?...🤷🏻‍♀️🎄

[EpicShitDippedBatBiscuit]

First off, comrade Hilda has been busy in the propaganda dept! Praise be to Hilda! The dear leader will appreciate and reward your efforts with a cushy job in the newly opened Ministry of Bullshit. ✊🥀

Specials board.

⭐️ Snacks.

•Salty Bar nuts
(we always have too many)

•Marrow crisps,
I know you all hate them, but we had a glut and needed to do something with them. 🤷🏻‍♀️😬

⭐️ Mains.

A festive choice of...

•’Properly Stuffed’ “Christmas voting” Turkey.

•Festive Glazed Gammons.

•Goose that laid the Gilded socialist egg.

•’Whigs’ in blankets.

•Sauce for the Goose and Sauce for the Gander

•Brussels’ sprouts.
Divisive, yet still popular in some quarters...

•Neeps and tatties.
Grown in Corbyn’s Communist plot and kindly gifted back to us by the SNP.

⭐️Festive Drinks.

•Rebecca’s long Baileys.
Seems nice enough, but can be vicious if you have too much.

•Corbyn’s Victory Gin.
State sanctioned by big brother.

•Bag in, artisan Earl Grey Cocktail.
A Boris election special.

•Red flag Rum.
for the singing socialists among us.

•Egg nog.
Gifted by Trump. Sticks in your throat a bit, but it’s polite to drink it and pretend to half enjoy it anyway.

•The #ClassicDmitri.
Shaken and stirred. A Russian Vodka based Cocktail, shrouded in mystery and intrigue. No one really knows how it came to exist, but all we know is, that it might have happened. Somewhere. And now it’s on the menu. Enjoy!

⭐️Desserts.

•Imported Panettone.
Get it fast, I’m reliably informed we will never ever have it again post Brexit.

•Traditional Christmas pudding.
have a good look for that old fashioned sixpence inside, we might need it when all the money runs out.

•Damson jam steamed pudding.
I’m told by the suppliers, that It’s like the infamous Mumsnet chicken, we can get eleventy billion servings from it and still have more for the freezer.

As always, welcome to all who pass through this place, but, as ever please observe the sign above the bar. If you can’t read it. It says...

DON’T BE A TWAT.

🎄 🌟 🎁 🍸 🥜 🦃 🎅

37.5% Tory, 25% each for Brexit party and libdems, and 12.5% for Labour in my survey analysis. Which is about where I would fit. Although I quite like our local Labour candidate, who stood last time too, and who I think will poll better than forecast. He seems sensible enough, and doesn't mention the Party leaders at all, which might suggest he's not entirely on board with their idiocies.

“Wow, that's some family history, Hate. Total respect for your DF.”

Ditto this! Amazing!

Apparently I'm 40% Tory, 40% Brexit and 20% Green. Pretty close to the mark for the next GE, thankfully no BXP candidate standing - so Tory I be on the 12th.

Mine came out as 77% Tory and 23% Labour...I recognised a number of the policies from the manifestos...

I'm not saying how mine came out but it's time for me to say goodbye to all of you lovely people and decamp to the Other Thread 😧😥

Kidding, of course. 😁

I recognised all the key words from all the manifestos, that's the trouble.

“I'm not saying how mine came out but it's time for me to say goodbye to all of you lovely people and decamp to the Other Thread 😧😥

Kidding, of course. 😁”

Fuck me lily. Never do that to me again, my apple heart rate thingy went bonkers. 😂

I’m not saying how mine came out, because. Reasons. 😳😂😂😂😂😱

Sorry, Epic! Couldn't resist.

😂😂😂😂 💔

Lily 😱

I KNEW IT!!

Splitter 😮

I recognised some key bits too so result was not unbiased - was shocked at getting a Labour policy though but that was an environment one & I've not paid any attention to environmental policies tbh

Because 'reasons' Epic...?!

Et tu Epic?

A CORBYNITE???!!!!

😂😂😂😂 no, my inner Nige came out higher than expected. 😱😳

.

I’m so ashamed.

I promise, I don’t hate people and I don’t want capital punishment. It must have glitched. 😳😂

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

I love the dog pic!!

Looks like they know who'll be getting my vote! 😂

Umm, not a million miles away from you, Girl

And in other news, after Jezbollah promising his followers all day that he would tackle Donald Trump at Buckingham Palace and demand that he keep his mitts of "our NHS", it appears that Our Man from Havana failed in his mission.

They never got within hailing distance of each other.

Who avoided whom, do you think? Was Jezza hiding behind the Corinthian pillars, trying to look inconspicuous in dark glasses and a Russian hat?

“And in other news, after Jezbollah promising his followers all day that he would tackle Donald Trump at Buckingham Palace and demand that he keep his mitts of "our NHS", it appears that Our Man from Havana failed in his mission.”

How bloody convenient.

Our Man from Havana

😂😂😂

Our man from Havana 😂😂😂

Lots of political mongrels on here then not pure blue as some posters who flit on would like to believe

Lots of time and rope for trump to do us in yet... Not in the clear yet although macron seems to be mopping trump up.

I'm loving melanias outfit.

“Lots of political mongrels on here then not pure blue as some posters who flit on would like to believe hmm”

😳😳😳😳😂

Et tu Epic?
*
A CORBYNITE???!!!!*

I'm relieved to report that, unlike Epic, I don't have a Marxist bone in my body, thank goodness. The very thought of it would give me a bad case of the Trots.

I have a lot of family history involving Unions, the Jarrow Marches, shipyards, strikes etc... their is defo a marxist bone hidden in my body somewhere. I have redder than red blood me! 😂😂😂 Luckily, however, we are now in 2019 and I also have a brain.

Morning, Epic! Kettle's on. ☕️☕️

I too have a confession to make. My paternal grandfather was a union organiser and paid-up member of the Communist Party. Understandably. He was a docker who lived in a slum area of Liverpool.

I think he would have been pleased with how far the family has come since through sheer hard work, though, and I can just imagine what he would have made of any privately-educated "E-stands-for-Excellent", Islington dwellers who sympathised with terrorists.