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Brexit

To not be able to speak to my near neighbours who voted leave?

617 replies

TooMuchCoffeeMakesMeZoom · 24/06/2016 23:43

My children's future has been put at stake. Our economy risks ruin. Our relatively -well-off neighbours in a place with nearly full employment and very low recent immigration (local care companies and NHS are desperate for staff) have voted leave. They are only around fifty.

I'm gobsmacked.

The irony is that the small business they are in is affected by the growth of China as an economic powerhouse. So why on earth do they feel that leaving the EU gives them more power? It gives them less.

I am so angry and feel so let down by my country. These people, and people like them ahem destroyed my hopes for a continued peace in Europe.

How on earth am I expected to talk to them on an equal footing, knowing what they have done through their own greed?

OP posts:
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lavenderbongo · 25/06/2016 02:01

I agree with you OP. Right now I would find it very difficult to talk to those who voted leave. I don't think your being too dramatic. Those who do clearly fail to understand the implications of this vote

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Sparklesilverglitter · 25/06/2016 02:07

Seriously? It is a democracy somebody had to win and somebody had to lose. It was there vote and they were entitled to vote however they thought was best.

Your neighbours weren't the only out voters, over a million more People voted out than in. Are you going to never talk to anybody that you know voted out ever again?

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MariaSklodowska · 25/06/2016 02:28

" Those who do clearly fail to understand the implications of this vote "

it is not about that, it is about not taking the vote to a personal level.

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Just5minswithDacre · 25/06/2016 02:37

I thought they were interesting, thoughtful, open minded people and now I see them as small minded xenophobes.

I'll say hello and smile - I wouldn't ignore them - but I have no desire to spend time with anyone who does the country so much harm.

No. play fair and ignore them.

Give them a chance to realise that you're a small-brained drama queen.

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MariaSklodowska · 25/06/2016 02:46

I mean, if you really start taking politics to a personal level , then the next step is when we start slaughtering each other, like what happened in Yugoslavia.

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Just5minswithDacre · 25/06/2016 02:47

Maria Sad

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trafalgargal · 25/06/2016 03:24

I think the entire country has gone mental.
Lots of idiots on both side who've never bothered voting before getting all invested and starting rows . Doesn't occur to them their disinterest and apathy in actual elections has a direct correlation to the dissatisfaction the majority of the electorate has expressed in a democratic manner.

If you want to blame anyone blame Cameron whose complete failure to gain any of the asked for concessions when he went to negotiate followed by negative campaigning by the government has led to this. Most people aren't even anti Europe what they are is anti Maastricht which is entirely different. Britain enter the Common Market no one voted for the EU in its current form, we agreed to freedom to work across borders but not to bestow life on benefits to all and sundry. That all came later and has being horribly abused by many nationals of the later joining nations.

I'm the daughter of an immigrant and on the other side of the family my grandparents fled the Pogroms and came to Britain .....not so different to the Yugoslav situation but that doesn't mean I'm happy to shell out benefits for years to people who play the system and come to Britain and don't work and expect the state to support them and their kids. They can work like the rest of us do .

Most of us are far too busy working and getting on with our lives to interrogate everyone we come across how they voted. What are you going to do change your doctor because you don't like how they voted, cancel life saving surgery because the surgeon voted leave, refuse to use certain supermarket checkouts as the cashier looked like they might have voted leave ? Best check the farmer whose cows your milk came from didn't vote the wrong way too. Or maybe you just want to cause bad feeling with your neighbours in what is clearly a friendly neighbourhood just to satisfy your inner drama llama.

Why not do what the grown ups are doing and wait and see how this all pans out before upsetting your kids and falling out with those around you. This is the very beginning of a long and unpredictable process....all kinds of things will happen before an exit is even a certainty. Free trade agreements will be created but without the political and financial restrictions of Maastricht. Granted if your children's father doesn't have a British passport then you may have some red tape to deal with but no doubt that will be addressed. Wait and see and stop assuming the worst and for goodness sake stop trying to scare the children (and if the teachers really were sobbing outside the school they should be absolutely ashamed of themselves and you should probably be looking for a better school with more professional staff).

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Salene · 25/06/2016 05:04

Grow up you idiot

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amy85 · 25/06/2016 07:29

Ffs get a grip!!! All they did was vote but because they didn't vote the way you did you now feel you can't speak to them... How pathetic...it's like being back in primary school some of these threads

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Fairylea · 25/06/2016 07:39

Statisically about half voted leave and half voted remain. So in real terms almost every other person you'll come into contact with will have voted leave, even if they say they didn't (and lots won't admit it). No point in being so melodramatic.

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exLtEveDallas · 25/06/2016 07:40

Hmm, I get how you feel OP. I've recently started a new job and I'm getting to know my colleagues. 3 of them were discussing the Ref yesterday morning, and all 3 were pleased we were 'out' and were 'going to get a handle on immigration'. It has made me feel uncomfortable around them, and I have no desire to become friendly with them. It is quite awkward.

Thankfully the 'boss' has the opposing view.

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Creampastry · 25/06/2016 08:03

Are you serious op? You're not going to talk to your neighbours because they had a different opinion to you? FFS! You nice .... Not.

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SouthWestmom · 25/06/2016 08:13

Your sports day was yesterday? Fuck, I'd better check the school website I though I had weeks yet.

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KERALA1 · 25/06/2016 08:54

I don't choose to spend my precious spare time with people I fundamentally disagree with. That is my right.

Yanbu op.

Fortunately the only leave person I know who voted leave is a detestable woman at the school gate. As I work in a profession and family and friends are well educated thoughtful people I haven't come across any leave voters.

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MajesticWhine · 25/06/2016 08:55

Anxiety of Europeans living here is real. They feel unwelcome. My German friend who I saw last night has lived here for years. She owns a house here. She feels now like she doesn't belong here, she was in tears for most of the day. Another friend who is Dutch says he will leave. He now feels that Britain hates foreigners. It's a sad time for these thousands of people who contribute to our society. I also know several former refugees originally from former Yugoslavia. Been living here for over 20 years. How do they feel today?

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ItMustBeBedtimeSurely · 25/06/2016 09:04

Crying in the playground? I don't believe you. No one is that infantile in real life.

My DD doesn't have a clue about the referendum. Why would she? She's a bright girl, but it's too complex an issue for her (and most adults, apparently.)

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trafalgargal · 25/06/2016 11:27

Whine if your friends had actually paid attention they'd have realised that any changes will not impact those who have lived and worked here for years. Perhaps you should have let them know this instead of scaremongering. There's an awful lot of remain supporters who either haven't researched or are deliberately ignoring facts.

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Nanny0gg · 25/06/2016 11:39

Oh, just get over yourself, do.

Please.

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Theydontknowweknowtheyknow · 25/06/2016 11:49

OP I think it depends on the reasons why they voted out.

We have a similar situation where some of my neighbours' reasons for leaving were clearly to do with immigration and some of my neighbours are immigrants. They feel extremely unwanted now because they are under the impression that the 52% who voted out were as anti-immigration as these people.

I feel for them and have tried to explain that many people voted for other reasons but it doesn't stop the feeling.

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MajesticWhine · 25/06/2016 11:51

Trafalgargal, it's not the fact that they won't get kicked out. It's how they feel. They feel hated. They feel excluded from society. It's not just about facts it's about feelings. You can't tell them their feelings are wrong.

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GhostofFrankGrimes · 25/06/2016 11:52

OP - in 6 months start a conversation about about house prices and interest rates.

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Willow2016 · 25/06/2016 12:04

If our school teachers were weeping and wailing about this at the sports day I would be having a word with the head!

What the hell are they on?

How are you going to know how everyone you meet voted? Are you going to ask them? There are 17 million people who voted out, your going to be very busy avoiding them all. (cos of course they will have all voted on the one issue, not by informed choice based on experience or knowledge etc)

As for your neighbours they exercised their democratic vote the way they pleased, nothing to do with you at all. If you dont like democracy maybe you should live elsewhere where everyone has to vote the same way or get life threatening repurcussions?

I dont care what my neighbours voted, they dont know how I voted, nobody does and thats the way its staying after seeing all the mind numbing abuse spouted on here and other places, mainly from the 'remain camp' but a little from the 'brexit camp too' I dont want to be associated with any of it.

I refuse to let a difference of opinion make me break off friendships or relations, if the person was someone I liked before hand (and they dont hold extreme views I find offensive in the first place) then they are the same person today.

The vote happened we have to deal with it slagging off others, pouring abuse on them and frightening children is pathetic. It doesnt achieve anything, funny how its not ok for someone to vote how they chose because its not what you voted for but its ok to villify them and lump them all together as racist, xenophobic, agist, uneducated, benefit scrounging, minimum wage, cloth cap wearing neanderthals. Erm pot and kettle?

These people arent doing the 'remain' voters any service. It makes them as nasty as the people they claim to be against.

I dont care what you voted for but am feeling pretty crap about being a member of GB right now for totaly different reason.

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WinniePooh101 · 25/06/2016 12:15

GET A GRIP!

Firstly, we live in a democratic society which means EVERYONE has the right to an opinion, it might be different to your opinion but that doesn't make their opinion wrong or your opinion right!

Secondly, they haven't voted leave to spite YOU, they obviously have their reasons and again that doesn't make their opinion wrong!

Thirdly, you clearly consider them to be narrow minded, uneducated, selfish etc etc because they don't share your opinions, again in a democratic society they don't have to agree with you and that doesn't make them wrong.

I wonder if they feel they can't bear to speak to you because you don't feel the same way they do??

Thirdly, where does all this 'and they're only fifty' crap come from?? Why is everyone assuming all the leave voters are over 50?? I work in London and work with people under the age of 35 who have voted leave and people over the age of 50 who voted to remain! YOU are just as ignorant as the people you're slamming!

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Just5minswithDacre · 25/06/2016 12:18

Statisically about half voted leave and half voted remain. So in real terms almost every other person you'll come into contact with will have voted leave, even if they say they didn't (and lots won't admit it). No point in being so melodramatic.

OR, we could all play it safe and stop talking to anyone Grin

The peace would be heaven Smile

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WinniePooh101 · 25/06/2016 12:23

Briliant post Trafal

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