Advice Needed

[JollyHostess101]

So my in laws have moved from Scotland down to the south as they’re getting older.

It appears now that we are in much closer quarters they have aged somewhat but more worryingly MIL is showing some massive signs of cognitive decline!

How on earth can we get her to get checked by the GP she won’t go if we just ask her… She gets so defensive if we pull her up on the forgetting/repeating stuff already! We’re hoping it’s just the stress of a massive move but at the same time need to be practical

Can my husband speak to their new GP (same as ours) and try and get her there for some other reason- would they tell her what we’ve done?

Or does anyone have any experience of being in this position and what our nexts steps could be?

And to add FIL is aware of our fears but playing it down atm and putting it down to the move!

I say well done to your FIL.
He’s taken action before his window of opportunity snapped shut.
He’s done you a favour.
Others will bring suggestions for your best route
So much more manageable when they are within 4 miles and not 400.

Oh absolutely…. I lost my parents young so haven’t had to go through this kind of thing with them ageing so it’s a bit of a minefield to be honest!

You can tell your GP exactly what you’ve said here and ask them what options you have. They’re limited by confidentiality, but there’s nothing preventing you from raising the concerns and getting some general advice. This is familiar territory for them.

I'd echo the advice of PP that you are in a much better situation now that they are nearby and that your DH can definitely raise his concerns with the GP. Has your DH got PoA for both of his parents? If not, now is the time to get that set up. How old are they?

Maybe get her to the doctor for a "general check up" and discuss the memory problems then?
Op there is an excellent group on here called the cockroach café.....its for anyone with an elderly relative.
A fantastic place for advice, support and love when dealing with elderly family x

Thank you!!

DH is going to pop down and have a chat this week see what the GP says!

Thank you everyone!

They don’t have POA set up I’ve been saying we needed to sort it for ages but they’re not interested….. My dad was kind of all over this stuff!

I don’t think we’d get her there off her own back so might have to be sneaky.

Its such a shame as we were looking forward to having them closer as our child is still toddler age so they could enjoy being grandparents and I pushed for them to be super close and now it’s all become a bit stressful atm!

I will check out that other thread thank you

Good luck, OP!

In a very similar situation we emailed the GP outlining our concerns. They arranged for her to come for a 'check up' . They never let on to MiL that we had been in contact.
In my experience GPs and medical professionals appreciate the assistance of family and are happy to take the insight and input from those close to the patient.

Thank you for this!

I’m so sorry your going through it too!!