When do people usually get ‘dementia’ - IF they’re going to get it?

[CrowdedClouds]

I have wondered about this in relation to my mother, who is 88. I wonder if people could shed any light on this? I guess I’m thinking ahead, planning possible scenarios, re. independence at home, care homes etc. She lives on her own, pretty independently, though has become housebound over the last 2+ years.

She is mentally coherent - on occasion sharper than me!

Is dementia usually something that would have shown up more clearly by now - IF she was going to get it at all? Or can it suddenly appear in very old age, 90+, albeit presumably for a shorter time period?

Thanks for any thoughts.

My mother was showing a few signs and then diagnosed with a rarer form of dementia when she was almost 92.

My two grandmothers never showed any signs (died aged 89 and 94).

I don't think it's something you can predict really, but it is definitely an old person's disease and the increase in the number of cases can be explained by our ageing population.

I'm not 100% sure but I do work with the elderly so I have some insight. Not all the elderly get diagnosed with dementia however a significant number do have some cognitive decline. This isn't necessary dementia. Its great that your mother has very sharp memory and long may it continue. I do come across some very healthy and sharp 90 year olds. I think a lot depends on how active and involved they are with the world around them.

Thanks @LindorDoubleChoc I guess I’m trying to - pointlessly I suppose - to hope that as she has not show signs yet, she might be more likely to have evaded it IYSWIM.

Mil was in her 60s

My dad was in his 80's and started to show signs after sustaining a head injury. He was previously very active and engaged in local societies, gym 4 times a week, out every single day, good supportive friendships, etc. Obviously, it's difficult to blame everything on the head injury but that did seem to be the start of it to us - he was never quite the same afterwards.

ETA - He did actually receive an Alzheimer's diagnosis.

MIL was 92.5 and had no previous signs at all
The first indication was that she had problems operating the microwave and the TV remote

Early onset Alzheimer’s or vascular dementia can happen quite early. Cognitive decline happens usually in older age. A lot of people die before it happens. If you live into your 90s you are likely to have decreased cognitive function. They may not label it dementia but the effect is the same.

Data suggests that risk doubles every 5 years from 65 to 90. Less research in the 'oldest old' (term often used for 90+) but the data there is suggests that risk continues to increase.

I am afraid that it doesn't work like that and the risk of dementia increases with age:
"The risk of Alzheimer's disease and other types of dementia increases with age, affecting an estimated 1 in 14 people over the age of 65 and 1 in every 6 people over the age of 80." www.nhs.uk/conditions/alzheimers-disease/

However you have said your mother has become housebound over the last couple of years. This could also increase her chances if she is not continuing to be mentally and socially stimulated.

At the end of the day, worrying about and looking at the likelihood of her getting dementia or not isn't going to change anything. She could live until she is 115 in good health, she could gradually develop dementia over the next year, she could drop dead tomorrow, as could you, as could we all. There is no point in worrying about problems she doesn't have.

Focus on what is and not what if.

Any time OP. I know people who started showing signs in their 50s, and some who started showing signs in their mid nineties.

My next door neighbour died at 93 i was speaking to her 2 days before she definitely didn't have dementia, she had slight decline i would say, but i don't think dementia is inevitable. Dementia runs through our family on my mums side i do think in my limited experience it is genetic,

Thanks all :-). I’m not unduly worried or need to focus on anything. More just wondering, and considering scenarios.

I think social isolation is a risk factor for cognitive decline and dementia, so becoming housebound is not good for many reasons. Would she consider a move to somewhere, if not a care home then some kind of supported/sheltered accommodation, where it would be easier to provide care and there could be more chance of social interaction?

My parents were housebound for years, but they had each other plus carers and cleaners etc as well as family visits. Even so, the isolation was not good for them.

This chart shows the prevalence of dementia in the UK, by gender (how many people have it - so the bar for 80 year olds includes those diagnosed earlier and still living with it):

commonslibrary.parliament.uk/dementia-age-and-deprivation-differences/

My mum died age 93 and never had any dementia at all. My dad developed it aged 70.

MIL is 97 and showing no signs of dementia. FIL lived to 93 and likewise had no signs of dementia.
My parents lived to 86 & 87 and neither had any signs of the disease. I'm hoping that's a good omen for both of us!

As others have said, completely impossible to predict and you are never 'in the clear'.

Best to focus on prevention measures - diet, exercise, social interaction, mental activity, cardiovascular health, cholesterol levels - none of which are a guarantee, but they can improve the odds.

My DM at 86 became more demanding and dependent after a very serious illness. She became unreasonable in her demands of me but still remained her self in most respects, especially to people outside the family. Then came the first lockdown which she loved - my daughters and I spent hours with her because there was nothing else to do.

A friend of mine who was part of our bubble (remember those!) was aware of her deterioration and pointed out to me that I needed to place boundaries to protect myself as I was in denial of what was going on. Within a few weeks of me becoming aware that her problems were the early signs of dementia she was in hospital after a severe bout of constipation and the dementia was obvious.

My DMiL is 90 and lives more or less independently with my sister in law keeping a close eye on her medication and physical health which is not good. Mentally however is she as she has always been. She has requested that if we are visiting please can we avoid mealtimes as she is too tired to cook for us all and she can no longer drive to visit us (an hour door to door). So when we visit we take a picnic lunch and eat with her. We make the drinks and wash up and clear away so that she has nothing to do other than talk to us. She says she is getting old and struggling which no doubt she is but her mind is as sharp as ever.

My mother died at 84 with vascular dementia. I’d say she had been showing signs in her 70s & the pandemic did her no favours. My father died recently at 92 and probably caring for my mother hastened his decline. But it was much much later.

My Mum started with it in her early 70s. We didn't realise it at the time, but looking back it's when her personality started to change. Lock down was what changed everything - the cognitive decline was severe. Her last couple of years were very hard, and she died at 79.

The geriatrics team she was under, said it was very common, as the social isolation was a critical factor. It really emphasises the importance of not just staying mentally active, but also socially connected.

My gran and relatives all started showing signs in their early 70s it was mixed altzheimers i think it was called. They died in their early 80s my mum is starting to show symptoms she is 73.

My late mil.died at 61 with vascular dementia it was a quick onset

My great aunt got dementia in her late 90s, around 98, for the last few years of her life - she lived to be 101. It seemed to be triggered or worsened by the death of her sister.

My FIL was 67, at 68 he was in a nursing home and hadn't a clue who anyone was

DH's nan was pretty ok till early 90s then her cognitive function sharply declined from around 92 till she died age 101. She was in her own home with a LOT of support till she was around 94ish then in a nursing home for the remainder.

Thank you for all your posts.