Thought I'd wrote a letter to all other parents about why my DD has a special 1to1 teacher - what would you like to know if it was to you?

[Thomcat]

As you may know Lottie has Down's syndrome. After a lot of struggling and paperwork we now have her statmented which basically means becasue she has specail needs and can't accress her curriculum as the other children in her mainstream nursery she has a 1to1 teacher to help her.

I thougth it would be nice / polite , etc if I wrote a letter to the other parents explaining who this teacher is, why lottie has her and that I fought for this and the money comes out of the LEA, not the school etc.

I thought before I did so I would ask, that if this was the case at your son or daughters nursery/school, what would you like to know about why and how and who and what etc?

Thanks, love TC x

oh FGS assumed, it's just a turn of phrase

yes, a patronising one

I think it can't do any harm and will probably help so why not

Well it's not meant to be patronising. Not many people do know about DS I've found. i just mean if they don't know here is my chance to explain/ help / or 'educate'.

surely that's the point, we don't

the vast majority of people know very little unless they are health professionals or have experienced it themselves. My dd had fairly bad allergies (mostly outgrown now) and I would have parents asking me if I was sure she was really allergic or whether she just didn't like the food in question. FFS!!

I don't think a letter is necessary at all but I think if TC wants to do it, then great.

Thomcat - I think it is nice that you want to do this, please don't be put off by AN's post!

oh assumed name, please, just don't worry about the wording of it, doies that have to be an issue right now? I wasn't meaning to be 'patronising' okay, I was justy trying to see if anyone had anything they'd like to know about DS so I could word the letter to the school mums, that's all.

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TC, you've just said that people can see lottie cannot walk and talk and yet someone has asked if they can have 1 to 1 like lottie has.

I'd want to biff them one. I really think it's way beyond your call of duty to the school, not to Lottie (of course) but the parents who can see beyond the end of their nose will now why Lottie has 1 to 1, and why she needs it.

I agree with Fio, as much as it's a lovely idea I think you will get questioned and not necessarlily(sp?) in a good way.

To be really honest TC, if you were a mum at Ds's school and I got a letter from you like this it would make me feel very sorry that you'd had to send them and I don't think that's the result you'd want.

Sorry to be so blunt.

you can never do right for doing wrong, or whatever the saying goes

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Fio, thank hon and I know where you are coming from but the other mums at the school all seem lovley but I never have enough time to chat to them all before I rush off to work, and I';m really not justifying myself, or Lottie, I'm using the opportiunity of the new teacher to offer parents the chance to ask anythig they want to ask.

LOL, this is not going the way I thought it would at all
Okay, I'm going to havce a think and a chat to D about this. Thanks.
Fio - you're so right re can't do right for doing wrong! LOL

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I think that all I'd want to know is 1) that Lottie has DS and 2) that you were happy to answer any questions. I wouldn't want any details tbh, I'd just like to know rather than speculate.

Before going to the unit my dd had support at ds's school nursery. I personally would not have felt the need to explain and justify why my dd had support. I mean it's my child with sn, surely it's tough enough. To be honest they should know why Lottie has support.

I like rickman's idea best .. think a letter could potentially be misconstrued

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I just feel that by writing a letter you are justifying Lottie and I don't see why you should tbh. Sorry TC as I really don't want to offend.

no i dont want to offend either TC, i just dont want you to feel under pressure to justify yourself and I think there are far more subtle ways to promote awareness than making it so personal Lottie and her environment

As a person with 2 DS foster sisters, i understand your reasoning i believe.

Could the teacher not hand out a leaflet about DS to all the parents one afternoon?

If asked 'why?' she could say that as Lottie has joined the school it was thought to be nice idea for the parents to understand Lottie and have answers should their children ask questions, ie why doesn't Lottie walk / talk / {a guess}not need the loo etc.

This way parents could approach you if they wished to talk after reading [one can hope] the infomation in the leaflet.

Congrats to Lottie on starting school.

As a person with 2 DS foster sisters, i understand your reasoning i believe.

Could the teacher not hand out a leaflet about DS to all the parents one afternoon?

If asked 'why?' she could say that as Lottie has joined the school it was thought to be nice idea for the parents to understand Lottie and have answers should their children ask questions, ie why doesn't Lottie walk / talk / {a guess}not need the loo etc.

This way parents could approach you if they wished to talk after reading [one can hope] the infomation in the leaflet.

Congrats to Lottie on starting school.

As a person with 2 DS foster sisters, i understand your reasoning i believe.

Could the teacher not hand out a leaflet about DS to all the parents one afternoon?

If asked 'why?' she could say that as Lottie has joined the school it was thought to be nice idea for the parents to understand Lottie and have answers should their children ask questions, ie why doesn't Lottie walk / talk / {a guess}not need the loo etc.

This way parents could approach you if they wished to talk after reading [one can hope] the infomation in the leaflet.

Congrats to Lottie on starting school.

Right well I don't want anyone thinking I'm 'justifying' Lottie having DS and having a 1to1 teacher and as that seems to be the overall feeling here I'm going to leave it. I just thought it might be a nice idea and would give everyone the opportunity to ask, to learn, to be nosey, whatever. I can't bear the thought that anyone could see it as me justifying anything, about anything, so the letter won't be written.
Thanks for all your POV's.