Do you think this playgroup staff member was out of order...?

[QueenEagle]

I took ds3 for a preliminary visit to the playgroup he will be starting in October the other day. A comment by one of the staff about my ds has left me a bit rattled.

As I was holding ds4 at the time, she helped ds3 to wash his hands in the bowl after painting. She handed him a paper towel which he held but didn't dry his hands with it. She tried to encourage him to do it but he was really shy and just put his head down, so she dried them for him and said, "Oh, another one who has everything done for him at home, I see."

Now I find this a tad out of order. Would you have thought the same or am I being oversensitive?

Although her comment was probably just off the cuff..light hearted and maybe she didnt even mean it like it sounded...it should not have been said. What other off the cuff comments might she come out with. I would have said something too her!!!

I would be really upset and angry. Statements like that can really affect a childs confidence and self esteem if he understood what she meant. What a silly thing to say! Obviously, he's going to be shy. Probably even the most outgoing child would be shy on his first proper visit to nursery where everyone is a stranger except for mummy.

wilfulwife - I have just picked up on what you said about ds possibly being labelled. That hadn't occurred to me until you said it but I sincerely hope she doesn't see him in October and think ooh there's the boy that is mollycoddled at home! I shall be keeping my eye on her you know now!

Yes she was out of order. Children are uaually shy when starting pre-school.

have a word to leader at next visit

I don't think this is a serious enough complaint to go to the leader with. What I think I will do is keep a discreet eye out and if there are ever any other problems with this particular woman, I can then say something if I feel it necessary and bring up this incident at the same time. On its own I think I can let it go.

any concerns are serious enough for the leader!
If it bothers you it is worth bringing up. He wont have a keyworker yet so the leader is the one to talk to.