What do non tv DC's get up to, what do they do?

[thecaty]

I am curious to know and happy to share what mine get up to.

Ahundredtimes, You are right up to a point,
I would say that conversations may be a bit different though as my kids Know very little about tv caracters for instance so when they play with their friends superficially it seems as if they would be missing out.
What I want to avoid really is that my DC's are confronted with a distant world they have no or very little access to. They can't change it or talk to it, well they can but the thing will just carry on and on. It is natural for young children to talk to things even grass, trees and any thing they can find and this is called imagination in my books. Most things will listen to what they say ( in a way) but a telly will carry on as if the child did not exist, kind of strange for some one dicovering this,our world really.
This is just a point of view, I may be wrong.

Yes, it's an interesting view point, I do see what you mean.

The one thing I would say - and I am not advocating TV here particularly - is that imagination is what gives you access to that world, which you become involved with, care about, are moved by, laugh at, or are excited by. I don't think TV is completely passive, but I see what you mean about having no physical relationship with it. But there is a mental relationship, I think anyway. I think it gives you much more - than say a book does - so there's less imaginative room, but it's not distant. Children don't tend to have distant relationships with things/stories they care about ime.

I think my dc's imaginations have been sparked by TV and by films, as they have by books too. But I like stories v. much indeed, and so am biased towards all sorts of ways of getting hold of stories. I also have never had much of a relationship with grass

dd1 is a very people person and has always liked the telly, dd2 is a bit more introspective and has never shown much interest in the telly. They both like it best when we are all watching something together.

When not watching (and in weather like this who would want to?) they spend a lot of time washing dolls and dolls clothes, having Exciting Adventures round the garden, blowing bubbles and doing normal garden stuff i.e. playing ball, bikes etc...

I don't know is there really at great TV/no TV divide?

Cheery.. I suppose there is a divide in as some people will not let ther children watch telly, others are selective and others use it as a baby sitter at times. So there is a difference in opinion.
I certainly don't believe my DC's are better behaved because they don't watch... actually they may watch a nature program a month with my other half and the few days a year they spend at granny's.
Ahundred..I certainly agree with stories especially told by mummy or daddy. I tell them a story every day for the last ten years and still my Ds look at me to say make it longer. The stories are invented and I think somehow they get a little picture of whats going on inside me, just a glimpse. They are certainly hungry for stories.

I disagree with your imagination bit as regards to books, especially the one's without pictures in them. You really have to use your imagination all the time, reading a book or having it read to you. Else how can you follow a story if you don't imagine for example how the dog looks like that is barking loudly at the postman or how the bark sounds etc. If you watch the same scene in a film then you are being given all this information as you can see the dog and hear how loud he is barking. So what is building the imagination is I would say the pictures we build hearing or reading a story.

I see what you mean, and it ought to be true, and yet I was a telly fiend as a kid but am now a writer, so it certainly never stifled my imagination.
That said, there wasn't that much telly was there? And no video. But whatever there was I would have devoured it .

thecaty - I think you misunderstood me. I said that TV provides more so there is less room for imagination. Undoubtedly. We are in agreement actually - except that I think pictures in story books are a wonderful imaginative provider - you have to give them some materials to work with!

I don't think tv stunts imagination though. I'm a writer too Litchick, and I devoured telly too as a child - and I watched lots of it, just as I did and do books, paintings, films, overheard conversations - I like stories, I get a kick out of them. I see my dc doing what I did, they watch something, then they go off and 'play' it.

balance, as always, probably the key wrt to tv

What ahundredtimes says- balance is the important thing I think. My ds1 is happy to mess about outside all day and never watch tv.
No. 2 gets lost in it, and it seems to fire his imagination; he'll go off and invent elaborate games on the back of a film he's seen.
In this day and age, I think to deny children access to any tv atall is a bit strange tbh. There's plenty of rubbish, and most people would agree with thecaty when she talks about using it as a babysitter.But there's good things too, educational, learning about the world around us, the opportunity to see things, places and that most of us don't have access to in real life.

There are amazing nature programmes, science programmes about space, other countries which encourage my dc's to ask endless questions.
And some great make believe and animations too. Some of the graphics are amazing.
As long as it doesn't replace stories and reading, I think it's a bit weird to not let them watch any atall.
It's keeping them from enormous areas of our modern media, which could hamper them in later life.

I do not believe that the odd program does harm to children as long as it is screened by parents. My children get lots of stories at school and at home to act out and I would certainly give this preference to acting out tv stories.
Generally my DC's do not have time to watch as they have a well balanced life, most of the time. there seems to be a time clock in them so they create their own balance of resting, activities, argueing etc... of course they tell me in their own way some times directly some times I have to listen, then I can steer them in the right direction...providee a calm place, read to them, give them attention, make things with them etc.
I do not think they get hampered if the don't watch as for me it is more important they experience and learn core human values to prepare them for the potential onslaught of information in their adult lives. This happens best between people or on their own.
As a child 40 years ago there was no telly in our house-hold till I was 12.
I am glad about that really.

My DD watches some TV which I am perfectly happy about.

However just because we have a TV in the house and DD watches it doe snot stop her dpoing all the other stuff listed on this thread.

She has been capable of playing independetly from being tiny, happy to go off and play with Happyland from 2yo for example. Right now, at 7y, she is in her room. She is playing with Polly Pockey and some new Disney versions along the same line. Has been up there for over an hour lost in her game. Before that, before I went to doctors, she spent 45 minutes writing a story of her own.

Having TV about has never prevented my DD from doing anything else, and I have never felt the need to limit or restrict it particularly - well, other than Dh who will watch any old rubbish

Mind you, the fact that she doesn't seem to watch a huge amount of TV at home might be the reason why, on the flight to the US last week, she managed to sit for almost 7 hours watching a range of films and TV programmes, without even the need for a toilet break

We don't have a tv. My DS gets up to the usual things a 6 yr old would get up to, he plays.

We do, however watch dvds and there are some amazing dvds out there, and having watched some of them in particular DS's imaginative play has evolved and expanded.

thecaty you are coming across as a tad too smug, to be honest.

Chicldren who watch TV can also have a well-balanced life you know

Overmy- well I hesitate to agree, but thecaty does sound a bit like the kind of Mum who lectures about the great way she does things, and no one else is as good.

My dc's have great stories at school too, and at home. A little bit of tv in the mixture does no harm, and actually adds to their creative mix imo.

When your dc's are older thecaty, you may find them begging to be like the others at school! My sister's kids hardly watch tv though, and they're about 12 and 14. But they have so much else ( ponies, quad bikes...( bone of contention emotion)

I don't think watching some TV means you don't learn core human values (whatever they might be) though - do you? Really? It's a rather apocalyptic vision!

I also don't think it's 'odd' or harmful to not have a TV. It's personal choice.

I'd also suggest that utterly un-adult regulated and sanctioned TV is probably by far the best and most enjoyable.

I've just read some other posts thecaty, am I right in thinking you're a Steiner teacher?

I think that means you may have a vested intrest in making out how good it is not having a tv

I am not so much interested in a debate about how much tv is good for our DC's. Nor do I want to judge anybody here, we make our choices and I am the last one to tell anyone what is good for them!
I am interested to hear from other non tv households or parents who believe it is better to be without it. I thought a forum for those kind of people would be ok. I have allready plenty of people warning me that if I do not let mine watch tv they will miss out.
A kind of peer presure. There is a right way for everybody and these are different with different people and that is fine with me.
I am a dad by the way but have the children 80% of the time as my other half works long hours, this was from the age of 3M for both of them

a thread on "in the club"?

Mine were non-TV kids and are now TV-kids. Still do much the same as they always did tbh: dd spends a lot of time reading and writing, ds spends a lot of time running around, kicking a ball, pestering for attention. Basically, they are the people they were.

The most "worthy" child I know in terms of how he occupies his time is my nephew: he plays several sports, plays the cello in an orchestra, composes his own music, reads a lot, helps in the garden. And is impeccably well behaved. But the family has always had a TV.

A steiner teacher eh? No wonder you're not interested in a debate thecaty .

lol @ cory's "worthy child"

Yeah- no wonder you kept quiet about the S word thecaty...

As a point of interest, this was in the Guardian this weekThe mum who had no tv as a child now watches it wall to wall.
There is that danger of course, which is why I think all or nothing maybe isn't the right route. I read another article over the w/e about a family in US who were brought up in the 60's, travelled around the world surfing, only allowed to eat an entirely natural diet, seven grains, and fish they'd caught.
One of them said that at 15 he used to work in supermarket where he gorged himself until he was sick on banned foods.
Another said he's always wanted to be a doctor, but because his schooling had been more or less non existant, he was never able to catch up.
All of these children were resentful of their parents "experimental" up bringing methods, and none of them had a life they were happy with as adults I don't think.

Not saying that no tv compares to this, but the rules parents make for their children which are excluding them from this 20th century world we live in can backfire.

(Annalisa Barbieri says chill out and don't worry too much.)

mine were non TV until school age - they did watch dvds, but not tv. By school age, like sweets, it became necessary because of the peer thing. And I was shocked at how much tv otehr children seem to watch.But as they didn't have the habit, they didn't bother much.
The for a couple of years they didn't have it simply because it broke, and as dh & I rarely watch we just forgot about it...
My parents being dedicated tv watchers got it fixed while we were away as a nice surprise for 'us'
Now (11 & 9) they watch, but switch off after the end of the program they want to see.
I have nothing agaist tv, in fact my one the best parts of the week is when we all sit down asa family & watch robin hood or primeval or merlin.

That's interesting MrsGuy that your children asked for tv when they went to school. I've been waiting with interest for dd to ask for tv, but she never has - she's now 7 & in year 2.

She also has the option of watching with friends next door, but never really takes it up - the only recent exception I can think of is the final of Strictly come dancing on Ice and she only watched that because her babysitters wanted to tbh.

We don't have tv because we've never had one IYSWIM, rather than anything more fundamental, so if dd was really keen we would certainly consider it.

I had come to the conclusion that tv is just not where its at these days - the thing that dd has wanted to do is go on the internet to particular things (Rainbow Fairies online etc) - but I guess that it was different for your dcs. What age did they ask for it - and what did they want to watch?

Would be great if people on this thread could be nonjudgmental and not only about me.
The point is to think out side the box.
I have nothing against people who let their children watch tv, I am just not sure what the benefit is.

Takver - my elder son saw the Simpsons at a fiends house - I didn't realise this, until he came out with some very profound/funny/cultural and historical alusions etc and I asked him where he had read that and it came from the Simpsons So we started to look at that and then other things like Raven that tehy had seen @ friends houses. They probably watch about 2-3 hours a week, including the time we watch stuff together. We often record stuff to watch later, and occasionally get round to it. Its great when we look at old corny tv stuff like Dad's Army which they find hilarious, or Randall & Hopkirk

friends house

My DS aged 10 came home today asking me my (humble) opinion on a statement by his friend at school. He said: "daddy is it true that when somebody is lying they blincker with their eyes and that is how you can tell"
I replied that it is possibly one way you can tell. We went on to discuss other possible ways some funny some ordinary, till we got to try some of these possibilities out including scratching our heads pocking our noses when we 'crackt' up laughing. Humour and fun is borne out of everyday live and situations, I think to myself two or three times a day when my DC's come up with questions or statements, some timess I get ten or more in a day.