private or state: how did you decide?

[marialuisa]

We're in the fortunate position of being able to pay for DD to go private, but we're really unsure whether we should.
Our local primary is dire but there is a strong possibility that DD would get into the neighbouring parish school (we're R.C.) At the moment this school has class sizes of 22, nice "feel", good academically etc. However a new housing estate on the way which will push up class numbers and reduce the chance of DD getting a place.

We have looked around and found that if we want DD to go private we should put her name down now for nursery class in January. Thing is I've not thought that any of the schools were particularly fantastic, indeed been quite horrified in some...

So, do we risk it and stick with the state system or put in the private nursery and perhaps move her if the state school is still ok when it's time for her to go there? An added pressure is that we live in a county with the 11+ and people tend to pay to make sure kids get into the grammars as the alternatives are not great!

So, sorry this is so long, but would like to know how other people decided....

KS - I'm with you girl - I think you've been reading my mind.

Um... well, I'm not one to talk on any of this but....

At one point you, ks, and you, badmamma, were saying the same thing: give state schools a chance. I mean, that's what you did, ks, and that's what you're espousing, badmamma. It's obviously gotten personal (stop it, as I would tell my boys), but you both have good points. Just read the article and I don't think it was targeted at people who have thought about the whole state/private thing it was targetted at those that have always ... and I mean always.. have assumed that private was best. No one here seems to have done that. I mean, I'm not offended. I have full intentions of registering my son at a private school if (hopefully when) we move back to London only because I don't know where we'll be living, if we'll get into the local state schools (we'll move in the summer/fall), etc etc. When we lived in Chicago, our local primary where my son would have gone, had a serious gang problem. Y'know, the kids getting shot and killed and all that. I would never have sent my son to that, although I wholly believe in public education. I don't think you can expect someone to sacrifice their child's future. But I do think it's reasonable to ask them to consider all available opportunities. "Consider" is the word here.. you guys have both agreed on that.

So, please give her (badmamma, that is) a break. I'm sure she's getting a lot -- not just through mumsnet. It's just that she can vent here... we've all done it. Let her have it too.

badmama I see you are doing your own bit to break down stereotypes of journalists twisting the truth for a "good read" and generally being shit stirrers.
Now how do I do an ironic face?

ks - don't let badmamma get to you. Read all her posts, and you'll see that a lot of them stir up trouble. She then disappears for a while. I'm not sure why her obvious intelligence is put to such use, but there you are!

beetroot, I realize that you never would ask about my boys. Of course not. They're fine, all the same.

(do I need more smileys or can I safely assume we're all friends here?)

I was educated in both the private and public sector. The state school I went to had, imo, better teachers than the private school - but the ethnic and class mix of people in the private school was unlike anything I will probably ever experience again. Children from all four corners of the world - some banked at Coutts (is that how you spell it?) and never wore the same item of designer clothing more than once, while others didn't have enough money for a twix at break time but had won one of the many scholarships available. And no it didn't leave me with a feeling of superiority - but it did teach me one thing. To like someone for who they are - regardless of their background or bank balance - because, believe me, there were some absolute shits on both sides of the fence

PS: The towels at my gym are really scratchy. Should I complain?

Bring them along to the yurt for washing. I find a final rinse in the cooking water from the placenta brings up the pile just lovely ... unless of course they're yak towels, in which case they're supposed to be scratchy - it's more beneficial for the soul.

that would depend on whether you like scratchy or not. or should i say whether you like it rough or not?

i was looking forward to a badmamma and ks punch up - i would have arranged a meet up for it.

beetroot- autism- which is fine- can deal with that- verbal dyspraxia/ motor dyspraxia- which isn't- can't deal with that- but unfortunately nor can the NHS. Hence the BIBIC trip

Badmamma seems to have gone quiet. I for one am very interested in hearing just how Junior doesn't represent a divided society. Badmamma did say it was the most intelligent magazine- she couldn't be saying you have to be posh to be intelligent could she? No surely not.

Jimjams, last comment

ks, your message was referred to a while back as a violin solo I believe, but look on the bright side - that sort of thing could secure you a scholarship to a private school according to Junior Magazine.

I just looked on their website and found the following:

'Secrets of scholarships
Fancy securing a place for your child at a top private school, without having to pay exorbitant fees? Then give your child a violin (or other instrument)
Author: Lucy Clement. 2600 words. This feature appeared in issue 43'

Junior magazine - now if I remember rightly that was the mag that featured a £160 pringle cardigan for a 3 month old baby...

...and recomended burning lavender oil to calm "tea time tension".

Hmmm.

Yes, I've bought it, but only for a bet.

Talking of intelligent parenting magazines - has anyone seen parentwise? I liked it.

I suspect "Lucy Clement" isn't one of Badmamma's pen names...

ks- go girl!

There was a great parenting mag called "wipe" but I think it was fairly short lived - I only found it once.

KS - no probs! I had completely forgotton the time you 'upset' me, so it just goes to show that I didn't take it to heart. Actually, now you have reminded me...grrrr

Ooh no KS, I'm too posh for that I'll pull your hair though, and then run. Bet I can run faster than you...