Starting off in a state school and then putting a child in to private at secondary level

[Thomcat]

I'd like DD2 to go to a local private school. Her grandparents are offering to pay.

DP says he wants to start her off at the local catholic school and then at secondary level look at putting her into the private school.

Her sister attends the local catholic school. A very good, lovely little school.
She doesn't go to said private school because she has SN's.

I think it's better to start DD2 off with the private school, which again is a lovely school, (but imo is just generally all round a nicer, better equipped etc school, I've done my homework) and then stick to that, as long as she's happy.

DP isn't sure.

What would you say?

• "ask how much your jeans were or where you got them from" and if it wasn't a huge amount or a non-designer shop then you were BAD and had obviously been deprived...

I went to state primary, private secondary, state 6th form (although in the top 10 in the country, so not necessarily typical), then uni, now doing a post-grad.

I can say that my state primary experience (of 3 different schools) was utterly miserable. Independent sector- best time ever! State 6th form, fantastic, but due to the fantastic facilities, I did find it hard to mix with some people. Uni was great, but many people from state schools were very snobby about those who had been to a private school, goodness knows why the topic ever got brought up, and it was a case of, well we must have worked harder or been more intelligent because we were more disadvantaged than you! I therefore kept my nose to the ground and hid my private background like a dirty secret

As soon as I have sufficient income, I will be putting my girls into the private system, and I will beg, borrow or steal to ensure they don't end up at the local secondary comp. If I had the money, I wouldn't even consider the local state primary school, even though it is rated OFSTED outstanding, simply because its ethos just doesn't fit with me. The other local schools are decidedly ropey.

Having said all of this, I am a Labour supporting, trainee teacher who currently works in a state primary- what a terrible creature of contradiction I am!!

I was state educated and DH was privately educated, and I have much better results than him. We tease each other about it, all than £ his parents spent! But he was excellent at sports for both the school, county and country, which is where he excelled. Now DS1 (aged 6) is being assessed for dyslexia at his state primary and there are lots of resources at his school, as we are in nice leafy Cheshire! I do worry about secondary school, as this one here is not great, but there are lots of options for private, so we are saving £ with a view to this for secondary school.

Really intersting post.