UK teachers report rise in problem parents

[Tabitha005]

Rude and disrespectful parents were a big issue when I worked in education ten years ago and, from this article, it seems to be an increasing concern.

Who’d be a teacher, eh? The shit they have to put up with is awful.

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2026/mar/13/teachers-mental-heath-parents-behaviour-education

That's quite rude but whatever 😂.

If that is what I did (I haven't read the whole thread) I feel it was entirely in the spirit of Mumsnet...

Cancel the cheque!

I am the EXACT same as you. It's unreal the entitlement. Some of these parents should be embarrassed. It doesn't help that we have to keep them happy due to numbers and the constant threat after the VAT increase. They want blood, you give them blood. They want more blood you give them more blood, is pretty much the message from SLT. I'll be out of this job in a few years. No way can anyone do it for a whole career anymore.

Agreed. The example of your 7 year old is interesting because I reckon if you’d posted that here at the time, you’d have had posters lauding her for being a “strong girl who knows her mind” etc etc. No, it’s cheeky and disrespectful (as all kids are at points).

So do secondary - depends on the school. My last school, teachers were expected to call home for any issues in their class and any issues with their tutor group. Pastoral only got involved with the big hitters.

That's obvious from this site, parents seem to think that they can involve school in all kinds of non-school things, eg parking, and that they can email staff at anytime, getting stroppy when there isn't an instant reply at 11pm on a Friday night. Many years ago some schools had a white line at the school premises entrance and parents could not cross it. maybe it's needed again to stop the ueber-entitled from bearding their child's teacher with petty moans when said teacher needs the loo and a cup of coffee.

We all see them at Parents’ Evening and events, plus they want appointments at other times. Don’t play Top Trumps with it. I’ve retired now but I’ve had frequent encounters with rude parents about work and extra curricular stuff.

I am amazed at the number of parents who seem to think the school should do their parenting for them.

It’s not surprising from what I hear from my friends and family in teaching but absolutely shocking. I can’t imagine speaking to anyone in the way some people report, far less someone who is in a position of authority over my kids.

My family members have reported coming into emails clearly sent at 11.30 on weekend nights when mum has been at the wine. Absolutely dreadful

It should really be a National Policy, Three Strikes and You're Out.

Three stupid complaints and the parent is told, "Please take John away and educate him yourself. You have wasted a golden opportunity. Bye bye and good luck."

Who would decide what is a stupid complaint? Three teachers. No appeal.

When education is viewed as a precious thing, a thing that can be lost, and people see others having their arses kicked out- then a bit more respect for teachers and education will enter the game.

Kissing the arse of parents makes them think they are king. Time for them to kiss the arse of teachers and if they don't like what they're getting, then off they fuck.

Sometimes, teachers are their own worst enemies. They have pandered and crawled and now, lo, they have no respect. Who would have thought it!

Bad behaviour, violent behaviour, will not be tolerated whatever the reason. You can't take a dangerous car on the road because it would be harmful to other users and neither should a complaining parent or a dangerous child be tolerated in a school-they harm other users.

When I was still at the chalkface, retired early 20 years ago, I had a motto, Discipline Is What Other People's Children Need! One incident sticks in my mind, walking back from the sports field a Year 10 boy decided it would be funny to pull the male teacher's track suit bottoms down. He was given a short suspension which his parents thought was an over reaction by the school, mainly because it would stay on his record when he applied for Colleges etc..

I’ve been saying for years that teachers are great targets for parents with chips on their shoulder. They’re expected to put up with criticism and sometimes aggression. No other professional is available to people like this; doctors and dentists will take you off their list, you have to pay to speak to solicitors and few people know the local vicar to complain at. Combine that with the idea that no one should ever upset your child even if justified, and here we are.

Oh, my goodness

Granted it’s a particular bug bear of mine but when you’re queuing outside the school and see a fully grown man butting in halfway with his child, pushing in front of kids, you know his own child doesn’t stand a chance.

I honestly don't think that any parent should have a teacher's email address, if there's a real problem then maybe they can contact a member of the SLT, but no teacher should be expected to reply to emails out of school hours, a 11pm on Friday email gets dealt with after 9am on Monday.

IMO it’s down to a rise in entitlement/yobbery, probably 50/50.

Plus of course the sort of parenting that can never say No! - and stick to it.

I retired ten years ago and there where rude, entitled parents and pupils then, but I know from my daughter, also a teacher, that it is far worse now.
When I go to a GP surgery or A and E there are notices everywhere saying that aggression towards the staff will not be tolerated. Quite right! But somehow it is acceptable for school staff to be spoken to in a way that would have you escorted out of the building in any other profession.
One problem is that the tolerance level for abuse on school staff has got higher and higher and senior management will only exclude for really serious offences because schools are judged, amongst other things, for their exclusion rate.

Beats me! The school didn't do it in the end

I have no doubt I would have been described as a rude parent when I insisted on a meeting with/spoke back to and challenged the head after my year 5 son was punched and dragged around by his tie repeatedly over the course of a year and the school refused to acknowledge bullying instead blaming my kid and telling him to give the thugs a wider berth.
times have changed, people don’t want to put up with shit like that anymore, Thank god

You can't speak to a specific teacher directly at my daughter's school without it being pre-arranged - you have to go through the school office either by email or phone. Every time I've contacted the school it's gone through the office and then either the year head or the head teacher has called me. I email them out of hours because that's most convenient for me but I would never expect a reply at that time.

It's a pain in the neck and can take ages to hear back but I can see that it protects the class teachers and lets them focus on the day job.

I was a Head of Year at one time. One day there was apparently, an altercation between two girls in my year group during PE. I was teaching elsewhere and by the end of the lesson, an irate parent was in reception baying for my blood. I hadn’t even been informed by the teacher and it was girls falling out, but he was in my face, wagging his finger and threatening all sorts.

In the days when there were year 9 SATs, the year group were in the ground floor hall, doing the tests, supervised by the exams officer and several other staff members. One lad absconded through the window and ran off. His parents refused to accept he’d done that, despite the written evidence of an entire year group and several adults.

We had a parent stand in the reception area shouting, yelling and abusing every member of staff. The crime? We had refused to treat her children’s hair with the specialist anti nit preparation.

At DD's secondary school there was a contract that had to be signed by pupils and parents to adhering to a set of rules and behaviours that were laid out in the document. This was about 2005. Not sure if this is still a thing

On the other hand education is more vital now, there are no unskilled jobs that you can get without GCSE’s, and teachers have a hell of a lot of power over kids. In my area they are using that power to force kids to wear blazers. Thats in spite of both national awareness of complaints about the cost of uniforms and the general unsuitability of blazers in the British weather. My kids came home soaked to the skin the other day as they cannot wear a simple coat any more, they would have to carry it around all day and it is dead weight. They have to have blazers. This is apparently more important than their actual education, gaining skills and abilities.

This is a very minor example of how conflicts can grow even among those who value education. Obviously other stronger examples can be found, given that education is no longer a route to success and wealth yet is still being imposed by those who have power. Similar conflicts can be found around immigration and cultural conflicts caused by mass immigration of peoples whose customs and histories conflict with our own and with each other, and the deliberate avoidance to face this from authorities.

Unfortunately we are in bad times and there will be conflict between those that have children to live and care for and see them through to live good adult lives, and those who are trying to make themselves a living in a faddy and power driven sector. Those who have the most legal power are the latter group, teachers, and they have the power to claim any conflict is just parents being rude. This will lead to further complications.

The wealth inequalities of our times are translating directly into power inequalities and therefore into conflicts everywhere. This is what politicians and previous generations have chosen for us. It’s not going to get any better.

Wow I've heard it all now, wearing blazers and getting a bit wet, can you imagine!

I have some sympathy if the school is requiring an expensive wool blazer as there are guidelines about affordability - for our school we can buy generic polyester ones which you can get cheaply from Asda if you choose.

Kids have complained about having to wear blazers in the summer since time immemorial - I did 30+ years ago but funnily enough it was a minor gripe which we'd never expect our parents to take seriously.

Get a grip.

That is absolutely true but teachers, now in an appalling position, played a large part in their own downfall.

They allowed pupils to speak back, then they decided that pupils should be listened to all times and that they must jump if a parent complained.

They didn't insist on a parent making a complaint to the school should make an appointment at the teacher's convenience and be given a set time in which to make it; not assume that if a parent made a complaint they should be treated as if they were Moses carrying the Ten Commandments.

It's a long path back but an easy step would be to say parents cannot have easy access. They must have a timed appointment at the teacher's convenience. No easy access. The matter is either important enough for the parent to inconvenience themselves or it is not.

If the parent turns up inappropriately dressed (code for saying, this is how little I think of you) the appointment is cancelled. The appointment is given a certain time, when that's reached, off they go.

If the parent becomes abusive, they are told to leave and take their child with them. if they refuse to do this, the police are called.

It would have the effect of making the school a place where respect is demanded, or at least the appearance of respect and that will do.

They must take off the "Piss on me I'm free label" and put on a "Very Very Expensive label".

Value yourself at nothing and in two minutes everyone will do the same.

Of course, this won't happen and some of those who would object will be teachers themselves! You couldn't make it up!