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Education

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UK teachers report rise in problem parents

459 replies

Tabitha005 · 13/03/2026 11:56

Rude and disrespectful parents were a big issue when I worked in education ten years ago and, from this article, it seems to be an increasing concern.

Who’d be a teacher, eh? The shit they have to put up with is awful.

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2026/mar/13/teachers-mental-heath-parents-behaviour-education

OP posts:
KatsPJs · 17/03/2026 11:33

HarshbutTrue2 · 17/03/2026 11:24

Oh dear. We have established that you don't have children.
You have heard your mates grumbling about school events. That's pretty normal for a working mum. But they usually do it anyway. The busy loving parents do it. The cba parents don't.
You seem to have a very bitter attitude to schools, although you claim to work in one. Cleaner? School receptionist - i doubt the latter because they see the end result.
You have never had the pleasure of sitting up late at night cursing as you create a last minute Easter bonnet. World book day costume: some very thoughtful, a lot of Harry Potters slung in the supermarket trolley. Oh God! a weekend building a castle out of toilet rolls. You have never had to source a cardboard box and cut it up, paint it red to make a roman shield. You have never scampered into work late (oh the stress) because you went to assembly to see your child receive star of the week - for sitting quietly at story time, or tidying up nicely. You have never had the pleasure of listening to your own child, and others struggle and develop with reading. You've never had the hassle of helping out on a muddy school trip, helping the child who can't put his wellies on, or wellies that have come off and got stuck in a muddy puddle, And, oh god, a trip to the pantomine to be paid for on the run up to Christmas, just when you're short of money.
Yes, mums moan. Why do they do it? For the look on their kids' faces. That's why. Kids love it when their mums' come into their school. Most mums like to see what happens in the school day. I can remember mums helping with the Christmas party when I was primary school.
I'd be interested to hear which parents are abusive. Do the helpers or non-helpers complain the most?

All I can say is wow. Your response is a fantastic demonstration of what I mean. And please do not try and denigrate me by trying to insinuate that I am “only” a cleaner. That just demonstrates your own prejudices.

You don’t actually know anything about my life or what I do, but attempting to argue that every single woman with a child in school does or should approach school expectations and events in the way that you do is disturbing. But I appreciate the creative writing project you have worked on this morning - well done.

HarshbutTrue2 · 17/03/2026 11:43

Where did I use the word 'only a cleaner'??
I said school receptionists see the end result. They often organise the reading rotas, they ensure DBS checks are in place. They are usually the first port of call for lost jumpers etc. They often know when parents are under stress and see the kids happily taking place in school trips and sports days, with parents helping out. Of course, teachers also see the end result too.
You are a really bitter nasty person. Maybe some work on people skills wouldn't go amiss. Try volunteering to help out in a school. It would be good for your soul.

KatsPJs · 17/03/2026 11:59

HarshbutTrue2 · 17/03/2026 11:43

Where did I use the word 'only a cleaner'??
I said school receptionists see the end result. They often organise the reading rotas, they ensure DBS checks are in place. They are usually the first port of call for lost jumpers etc. They often know when parents are under stress and see the kids happily taking place in school trips and sports days, with parents helping out. Of course, teachers also see the end result too.
You are a really bitter nasty person. Maybe some work on people skills wouldn't go amiss. Try volunteering to help out in a school. It would be good for your soul.

I really hope the irony of calling me names and being incredibly rude to me on a thread about the issues of increasing levels of abusive and entitled behaviour in the school system is not lost on you.

cantkeepawayforever · 17/03/2026 12:08

WhatNoRaisins · 17/03/2026 08:13

I also wonder if gentle type parenting has fed into this. A lot of the parents that I speak to about these complaints have really high expectations for how the teachers or other staff will adapt to the emotional needs and personality of their child and get very upset when the staff don't share their enthusiasm.

It's very commendable that a parent has done this work to help their child regulate and thrive but its not really possible for an adult looking after a group of different kids to replicate it.

I do think that we are at a point when there is a particularly significant mismatch between the prevailing model of parenting; the school curriculum and accountability framework; and the school processes and procedures that allow the delivery of this curriculum.

So (at a grossly generalised way, thinking about primary):
1950s: authoritarian parenting, dry curriculum taught in a ‘chalk and talk’ pedagogy, authoritarian teacher style.

1970s: some more liberal parenting, much more experiential project-based curriculum, a mixture of teacher styles but some less authoritarian, very little accountability for the academic success of the teaching.

2000s: more liberal parenting, but still some respect for authority. Centralised curriculum (previous NC) but still relatively creative. Ofsted and SATs give rise to a much more rigorous, sometimes punitive, accountability regime.

2020s: gentle / permissive parenting style prevalent. Respect from authority highly eroded within society. Gove’s NC harks back to the 1950s, and requires highly didactic chalk and talk methods of delivery. Ofsted and SATs mean that this curriculum must be taught with fidelity, meaning that classroom management is focused on maintaining order during this style of teaching.

There are if course other factors, such as screen addiction, funding and the drive to inclusion between the 1970s and 2000s, that come into play.

It seems to me that today’s permissively-parented children would actually do very well in a 1970s style primary classroom (they might not learn as many facts, but the style would suit them) IF that option was allowed rather than punished within the accountability framework. It’s interesting that most ‘inclusion units’ / ‘nurture groups’ etc within schools that I know do follow a more ‘1970s-like’ routine of more outside time, more collaborative learning, more child-led projects, little focus on chalk and talk.

Ubertomusic · 17/03/2026 13:13

KatsPJs · 17/03/2026 11:59

I really hope the irony of calling me names and being incredibly rude to me on a thread about the issues of increasing levels of abusive and entitled behaviour in the school system is not lost on you.

It's not lost on the onlookers for sure.

hopspot · 17/03/2026 17:59

KatsPJs · 16/03/2026 19:32

I think it’s quite disingenuous to say that someone can just ignore messages. The point is the quantity of communications from schools are often frustrating and in some cases upsetting for a lot of parents. Would you accept receiving constant messages from any other organisation asking for your time, money and energy week after week?

Some parents find an email from the school about bake sales or newsletters upsetting? Really?

I’ve been a teacher for a long time and parents are far less involved than ever before. Parents used to hear their children read and barely any do anymore. Parents used to volunteer to walk to church etc and barely do now. I understand as I’m at work so can’t do these things for my own children’s school.

I recognise that many people can though, that’s why school’s ask for volunteers. If you can’t help then say no. It’s as easy as that.

newornotnew · 17/03/2026 19:09

hopspot · 17/03/2026 17:59

Some parents find an email from the school about bake sales or newsletters upsetting? Really?

I’ve been a teacher for a long time and parents are far less involved than ever before. Parents used to hear their children read and barely any do anymore. Parents used to volunteer to walk to church etc and barely do now. I understand as I’m at work so can’t do these things for my own children’s school.

I recognise that many people can though, that’s why school’s ask for volunteers. If you can’t help then say no. It’s as easy as that.

It isn't just teachers who work. The majority of parents are at work, and quite a lot of those who are not have a reason.

Teachers can't just assume everyone else has lots of spare time.

hopspot · 17/03/2026 19:12

newornotnew · 17/03/2026 19:09

It isn't just teachers who work. The majority of parents are at work, and quite a lot of those who are not have a reason.

Teachers can't just assume everyone else has lots of spare time.

Oh my gosh really? I didn’t realise anyone other than teachers worked.

At what point did I say that only teachers work? I said that those who had time would volunteer and those that don’t won’t.

newornotnew · 17/03/2026 19:19

hopspot · 17/03/2026 19:12

Oh my gosh really? I didn’t realise anyone other than teachers worked.

At what point did I say that only teachers work? I said that those who had time would volunteer and those that don’t won’t.

You said parents are far less involved than ever before but that's because parents are more stretched than ever before.

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