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Original poster

What jobs do private school parents do?

139 replies

gormin · 27/12/2023 11:10

If your DC go to a local private (non-boarding) school, what kind of job/salary do you have?

I'm mostly just being nosey. DS has just started (state) primary and we're happy with it but thinking for secondary we may go private. But I wouldn't want him to be the only kid who doesn't come from a mega-rich family.

On a related note, do kids at private schools feel a lot of pressure to wear designer clothes, go on expensive holidays, etc because their friends do?

DH and I are both state educated, as you can probably tell from my ignorance! We're doing ok, professional jobs with above average salaries, could definitely afford private with some sacrifices, but definitely not 'rich' or 'posh' in any way.

OP posts:
twistyizzy · 27/12/2023 11:20

There is a good cross section at DDs scool: from a few mega wealthy parents down to those who have had to really save/fees paid by grandparents. However we are North England so a lot less truly wealthy people than a London private school for example. Careers of DDs friends' parents are: consultant, teacher, nurse, pharmacist etc. I am a senior manager in a training company and DH works for Big Pharma.
No pressure at all for designer clothes/holidays etc and in fact fewer kids have these things because parents are paying for fees so a lot more DC holiday in UK/have older cars etc than did in her state primary. There is generally a view of not wanting to flaunt wealth so flashy cars/bling is looked down on a bit for being tacky although that may be because the school attracts a lot of farming types as rural so a lot of DC have horses etc. Maybe in an urban school there might be more DC in designer clothes.

HiccupHippup · 27/12/2023 11:21

I’m a SAHM but do have rental income of a few hundred each month, DH is an estate agent earning around £100K pa. I budget very well. No expectations or competition, unlike state primary we’ve found.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 27/12/2023 11:23

The people I know with children in private education are:
Lecturer
Physio
Solicitor
Accountant
Architect
Pub landlord
Vet
Vet
Vet
Vet
Project managers in various fields

At least half of them have inherited some kind of money in trust for school fees; ie they don't pay school fees from income.

bloatedbobby · 27/12/2023 11:24

I’ve worked in private schools in London. Tbh it depends on the school as some will attract the very wealthy & I think due to property prices there is less of a mix now vs when I was young. My friends who are “too poor“ to pay for private schools aren’t poor at all eg million pound houses, 6 fig salaries but they come from money so gps pay. Look for schools with higher %s of bursaries maybe.

Lifeinlists · 27/12/2023 11:34

Lots (and lots) of doctors in the one I used to teach in. Their children would mention it at one time or another, or I would come across the odd one in a medical appointment Blush.From GPs to consultants.

Other professions too and then other jobs I had no idea about as it wasn't my business.

As there is also a generous bursary scheme there, I imagine there's a very broad spectrum.

Mirrormeback · 27/12/2023 11:34

A mix of inheritance and grandparents mainly I'll be honest

I know plenty of people who are pretty dim and don't have good jobs and are not in the slightest bit intelligent or interesting but have been given the money to send their also not very bright or charming DC to local independent schools

My DC go to state schools that have millionaire DC and DC from the most deprived and shocking backgrounds.

But you know what they get on and hang out and go on to do what suits them without judgment like A Levels, BTEC, vocational stuff like carpentry, bricklaying, music all sorts of stuff.

They're a supportive bunch and know so much about each others history and lives and just take each other for what they are unless they're simply nasty which no one likes and is pretty rare past Yr 10

Mirrormeback · 27/12/2023 11:35

I do know a few consultants, GPs and surgeons etc who send their DC to private schools but the more academic ones

BringItOnxxx · 27/12/2023 11:37

At my local private school they all drive either teslas or massive 4×4 for the school run. Don't know if that indicates anything.

shockeditellyou · 27/12/2023 11:37

I think the majority of school fees are paid by grandparents these days, so parent’s job is not necessarily a good indicator.

Certainly round here, two NHS consultants would struggle to buy a half decent house, pay childcare (wraparound/nanny/nursery) and then school fees on top, even more so if they have student loans to repay.

My aunt and uncle pay my niece’s school fees, and my cousin works in an okay job in PR whilst his wife earns pin money.

Newsenmum · 27/12/2023 11:39

Depends on the type but the more ‘affordable’ day ones are a mixture of doctors, lawyers, finance and very high up management chain. Sometimes both partners or sometimes just one partner with the other a teacher or something. Some families clearly more stretched than others.

You need to look at ones near you and feel the ‘vibe’.

bloatedbobby · 27/12/2023 11:42

I remember a lot of GPs, consultants, surgeons, lawyers etc but a lot of those will come from money in the first place.

CanaryCanary · 27/12/2023 11:45

Our school has optician, pharmacist, estate agents, vets doctors, lawyers, artists, hairdresser etc etc. Reality is a high proportion have family money and other income sources. Eg their parents bought them a house to live in as a student, they now rent it out and that’s what actually pays the fees. Or they inherited a profitable family business or grandparents just outright pay the fees. So it’s more varied than you’d expect.

Halloweenrainbow · 27/12/2023 11:54

My DC is at a non selective private school and many families, like us, are not wealthy at all and have the fees paid by grandparents. What I find common is that many of the families have their own business eg. a restaurant or shop. Both parents work together and share the business responsibilities and the childcare which seems to work well for them. Most kids seem to have a least one parent available for mid-afternoon pick-ups and holidays which suggests they have a good level of flexibility and probably save a lot on childcare because of it. It was the same when I was at private school - most of the families ran a business.

EwwSprouts · 27/12/2023 11:55

At DS's school it was, off the top of my head from his friendship group,
vet
own business
NHS consultant x3
pharmacist
on the oil rigs
vet
taxi driver
finance director in industry x2
NHS finance
marketing
teacher in a state secondary
teacher at the school x2
GP
carer for sibling with additional needs
dentist
police

AutumnBride · 27/12/2023 12:02

I know a couple of families where one parent works purely to pay school fees, and they live on the other salary.

Emelene · 27/12/2023 12:17

Doctor (registrar not consultant) and teacher here. We’re using our savings too and I’m taking on extra shifts. Unfortunately our local state school was massively downgraded by Ofsted and has serious problems, or we would have gone there. But it’s an incredible school we’ve ended up with and we’re really pleased.

Quite a mix of parents I’ve found, a few NHS GPs and a surgeon who also works privately, as well as some in finance and IT. Some SAHMs.

Original poster
gormin · 27/12/2023 12:18

Thank you all for your helpful and interesting responses! Interesting to see how common it seems to be for grandparents to pay the fees - this hadn't occurred to me before.

OP posts:
friedsausage · 27/12/2023 13:28

Musician and tech worker here. High household income (mostly from tech worker and investment income). Lots of lawyers and finance professionals at our DCs school (north London prep). Mostly 2 income households and often a nanny as both parents have long hours (I work pt on an average wage and do all drop offs and pick ups). We pay for fees out of income and don't get any help from family. I'm not aware of GPs paying for any fees but it's not something we'd ever discuss tbh.

Our DCs are young (under 7) and there's no pressure so far for designer clothes or expensive holidays. Most families do go abroad but also lots of Cornwall hols etc - it's about convenience with younger dc. We're happy doing Eurocamp holidays though we could afford to pay more. We don't see their friends non-uniform clothes that often as any play dates tend to be after school. Rarely see parents cars as the school is quite central - parents/nannies bring them by tube, walk or they travel alone by school minibus.

MissyB1 · 27/12/2023 13:33

Dh is a hospital Consultant and I’m a teaching assistant. We only just afford it really, and we only have one dc.

No the kids don’t seem bothered about designer clothes or the latest tech. No one cares about your background or what car your parents drive. But we did choose a small day school which is cheaper than the other private schools in our area.

WarningOfGails · 27/12/2023 13:35

The Telegraph had an article where 2000 wealthy older people were surveyed & 79% of them were paying grandchildren school fees. My SIL was telling me her prep does a special grandparents day as so many of the children are supported by grandparents paying.

kids I know in private school -
doctors
undertaker
farmers - lots of farmers
lawyer
builders
sales
vet
army

WarningOfGails · 27/12/2023 13:37

MissyB1 as I read your first sentence I began to wonder how you afforded it, then I read on. One child, makes sense! We have 3, DH is a GP and I earn about a TA wage. Can’t afford it.

Halloweenrainbow · 27/12/2023 13:37

To add, in all my years experience with private schooling, I've never known of anyone being preoccupied with designer labels. Good quality, well fitted items like coats and shoes and sports equipment is prioritised, but I've honestly never known anyone spend excessively on something just for the label.

Easipeelerie · 27/12/2023 13:43

Depends on the area and the school and there is is a wide variation within any private school.
DD went to a small non selective prep in the north of England. Everyone in the class was working class with money - small business owners typically. In the high school I work at, in a more middle class area than DD’s prep,many parents are doctors, surgeons and other things in the medical field, business owners, lawyers etc.. A proportion of children have fees paid by grandparents. There are bursary holders with parents who are, for example, taxi drivers.
BIL works in a southern boarding/public school - there are celebrity media people, large business owners, children of the teachers etc.

gwenneh · 27/12/2023 13:43

Bizarrely I don't think I really know what professions the other parents are currently in - we haven't really done parents' evenings since 2020. There seems to be a high number of marketing & tech development professionals but I would notice that as it's my own field. There are at least two dentists, one software engineer, a builder, and a vet.

In the past there were definitely a high concentration of sales in all sectors, lawyers, a GP or two, and loads in finance or accountancy.

Grinchinlaws · 27/12/2023 13:51

I’m a lawyer in London with a high income (>£250k), DH works in the public sector on a fraction of that. Of my colleagues, the only ones whose kids are in private school are partners (earning £1m+), dual high earners, or the grandparents are paying.

We have 2 kids and another on the way and couldn’t afford it for 1 never mind all 3.

My niece is in a prep school in London and SIL’s parents are paying. SIL is a SAHM and BIL a primary teacher.