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Original poster

Parents of August borns! Any regrets about not deferring?

122 replies

PuffinsRocks · 10/04/2023 15:08

Did you regret sending your August baby to school two minutes after they turned 4? We haven't deferred as we can't afford the extra year of childcare and I'm worrying about September already!

OP posts:
sorrynotathome · 10/04/2023 15:09

No not at all. I expect you’ll find about 50:50 opinions here.

Houselamp · 10/04/2023 15:32

No not at all,
Even though they seemed so little at the beginning, they have done perfectly fine.
Someone has to be the youngest and although it sounded scary thinking some of the children will be nearly a year older, its not like they will be in a class full of september-november borns, half the class will be less than 6 months older.
Reception is very manageable for a four year old.

RandomMess · 10/04/2023 15:33

Yes. No they are more older I really wish I had been able to.

Original poster
PuffinsRocks · 10/04/2023 15:36

@sorrynotathome @Houselamp thanks that's reassuring!
@RandomMess if you don't mind me asking, what do you think would have been different if they had started a year later?

OP posts:
Losingtheplot2016 · 10/04/2023 15:37

Mine is now nearly 13.

Yes defo. Wish I could have deferred.

Swearwolf · 10/04/2023 15:38

Not quite what you asked, but my oldest is September born and turned 5 a couple of weeks after he started school. That last preschool year was tough as he was so ready to join his friends in foundation, and being one of the oldest in the year he gets frustrated quite often. I'm not saying you'd definitely have the same issues if you did hold yours back, but it's a side of it that doesn't always get considered.

Fairislefandango · 10/04/2023 15:39

Mine (26th August) is 17 and due to go to university this autumn. No regrets here. Always been a high achiever for her year. No problems at primary school.

SocksForceFive · 10/04/2023 15:40

If you change your mind as long as the nursery has space, you can still access your 30 free hours (or 15 if you're not entitled to 30) and tax free childcare. For us it works out roughly equivalent as after school clubs (obviously I don't know your area or financial circumstances so apologies if you already know this or if it doesn't apply to you!).

You can still decide to defer - join the Flexible School Admissions for Summerborns if you want to look into it further.

NamelessNinja · 10/04/2023 15:41

Not as yet. My eldest started school at 4 and 2 weeks old. Struggled with tiredness during reception but only once he got home. Now, coming towards the end of year 1 he loves school, loves maths and is in top reading group and has made some lovely friendships. Can't tell you whether I will regret it in the future but no plans to defer my youngest August baby either

Bsmirched · 10/04/2023 15:48

20th August birthday, now in Year 5. Absolutely no regrets at all.

wlv12 · 10/04/2023 15:49

Mine is 13 now, and is an end of July born not august. No regrets here on sending him.

starlight2023 · 10/04/2023 15:51

No regrets, upper primary now and hasn't struggled at all. My January born struggles though.

Walkingtheplank · 10/04/2023 16:02

No regrets at all. He was very ready to go to proper school. He was definitely a bit behind in Reception in terms of just wanting to play rather than doing much academic. He got to grips with reading but his fine motor skills weren't developed enough to write. Particularly with boys, this can be an issue.

However, by October half term in Year 1, he was on 'top table'.

With DCs at both ends of the academic year, there are pros and cons to both. I cant imagine that we would have agreed to hold him back a year.

Original poster
PuffinsRocks · 10/04/2023 16:05

@Swearwolf thanks this is definitely a consideration. We've been telling DC about school since January and they're really excited to go and keep asking when they can go.
@SocksForceFive unfortunately in a small town in the South East where you have to do a Star Trek style fight to the death for nursery places.

OP posts:
Original poster
PuffinsRocks · 10/04/2023 16:07

@Walkingtheplank it's the writing that worries me. And the toilet. DC isn't toilet trained yet, they're just not "getting it" and I'm worried they won't be by September.

OP posts:
Iwanttoquitthegym · 10/04/2023 16:07

Not at all, in year one now and loving it! Some of her friends are nearly a year older but they have all been the same with tiredness in reception.

shivermetimbers77 · 10/04/2023 16:09

Totally depends on the child : I was youngest in my year at school and never noticed any difference between myself and my peers, but my nephew who is also August born has SEN and could have benefited from another year in nursery. What is your concern about your child OP?

Mañanarama · 10/04/2023 16:10

Didn’t defer, don’t know anyone in real life who did, no regrets whatsoever. Schools and reception teachers are used to the age range and it soon evens out. A neuro typical child should be absolutely fine.

onlypans · 10/04/2023 16:11

I've got two early august babies and didn't defer but in both cases I felt it was easier as they had an older brother (who was much older in his class, so nearly 5 on starting). It was like they already "got" the concept of what you were supposed to do at school because they'd seen him do it. I look at DS2's reception year pic and he looks like such a baby! He's in year 4 now and totally fine, despite the covid disruptions

madmumm · 10/04/2023 16:12

No regrets with my youngest, I did consider it and talked to his pre school teachers, but they had no concerns. He was tired in the first year, but now almost at the end of primary and no concerns at all. I wouldn't really worry to much about the writing, this will come with time. Concentrate on the toilet training, this will help with confidence.

Allthegoodusernamesareused · 10/04/2023 16:13

My late August baby is now 18 and doing very well at university so no regrets now... however, I'd have had a different response during her first few years at school when everything was a real struggle. It took until year 2 for her to really catch up. A lot of that is down to her only getting a term in reception though, as at that time summer born kids started after Easter.

ChocHotolate · 10/04/2023 16:13

No. My boy is in Y6 now. Academically he is average (no one on MN ever seems to admit their kid is average) but socially he is so ready to leave primary school. I did wonder about deferring especially as he had a minor speech delay, but I'm glad I didn't

YukoandHiro · 10/04/2023 16:14

No regrets as she's very happy but I'm very aware of the difference in maturity between her and some classmates. The main issue is managing my own expectations/not focusing on comparisons as it's unhelpful. As far as she's concerned, it's fine

Smithstreet · 10/04/2023 16:16

No none at all. I have 2 summer borns, July and August both absolutely fine in secondary and doing well. However if my autumn born, who is 4th oldest in their year, had been an August baby I may have thought about it as they definitely needed the extra time to get ready. So all different but no no regrets

NotMyDayJob · 10/04/2023 16:16

DD5 is very, very end of August. For her it's worked it well. She's bright and would have struggled with another year of nursery and she'd have been some sort of (giant) borderline genius if she'd been in the year below and the oldest. It does help, she's tall and physically can hold her own. She's never been one of the diddy ones.

There's a few maturity issues, but overall it's worked out well for her.