Are private schools worth the £££?

[JamdaniSari]

Hi all :)

We were discussing this at work yesterday and now that I am a mother it really got me thinking.

Are private schools worth the £££?

What if you couldn't afford to send your kids there and they attended an 'average' local state school. How would you go about ensuring they achieved their potential, were well rounded and had the confidence etc which their peers at private school would be expected to possess?

Thanks

Depends on the school, depends on the options, depends on the needs of the particular child.

If I couldn't afford my children's schools, I would take the money I did have and try and recreate all of the extracurriculars which the school provides, getting them involved in outside clubs which do their interests to a high level, and find interesting international opportunities for them.

Depends on the school. Mine are at an outstanding comprehensive, the outcomes are broadly the same as the private schools e.g most kids to Russell group unis, the demographic is broadly the same e.g middle class professional families. The core academic education is broadly the same e.g maths, English science history geography etc all well taught with extremely high expectations. The ethos and expectations of the pupils of the school are broadly the same

The sport music and drama are not as good but is better music (only 1 of mine musical) sport (there’s still good sport) and drama (none of mine interested in drama) worth £20k per child per year? Not in my opinion but others will beg to differ.

If my only option was my local comprehensive which is academically ok but I don’t share their ethos then £20k per child per year would be a serious consideration

Depends on the schools in your area and your child
If I couldn't afford private, and the state school was only average I would sign them up for as many extra curricular activities as possible and keep an eye on homework they get set and maybe consider doing a bit extra with them myself in the evenings etc?
There is no reason a bright child, esp one with parental support, wouldn't do incredibly well in an average school.

Probably not if compared with a state school that is a good match for the child in question.

Am privately educated, will not be able to afford the same for my kids despite me and DH being in equivalent jobs to our parents...

Networking realistically applies to a very few schools, basically the big obvious names like Eton, Westminster, St Paul's. University would be more effective than school for networking!

Extra curricular opportunities beyond the obvious depend more on parental knowledge and experience at state schools - pretty well every extra curricular could be organised by a parent provided they are available for logistics and not working long hours. Private schools have more in hours/organised after school activities because parents are more likely to both be working long hours as 2 incomes needed to fund...

The difference is where the only possible
(Or allocated) state option is a poor fit for the child. Classic e.g. of quiet child who needs to improve resilience in school where "swots" and "nerds" are targeted. Or a child who will tend to coast unless pushed at a school with relatively low expectations (or that doesn't offer suitable GCSE option).

Daughter’s private education has repaid a thousand-fold.

First, getting her out of the thug-culture of our local church schools.
Then, offering a wide range of educational opportunities she wouldn’t have had elsewhere locally (Latin,Greek, all the extra-curricular activities, including choral courses, language courses).
Putting her in a position where her chosen universities were competing to get her - offers of ‘two Es at A level’.
Giving her experiences to build confidence to aim high and expect good things.
Ultimately leading to her making a good marriage and having the lifestyle she has now.
Thanks be to God.
And thank you to Assisted Places and the bursar who had to accept some of the fees late and in coin.

The schools in my area are average....at best. School standards here have changed drastically since I used to attend.

There is a 'free' catholic school & sixth form which is rated excellent however it is extremely competitive and highly selective.

There is also the private school which again is high achieving however it's beyond our means.

Thanks. This was reassuringly more along the lines of what I wanted to hear. The state schools in my area aren't particularly good and my husband and I wouldn't be able to afford private.

Are there any extra curricular activities in particular you would recommend, other than a sport which they are interested in? Anything I should be doing while they were still in primary school?

We are in that bracket of can't afford private, but can manage something for extra-curricular. Here's how we spent it in primary:

Primary age is a good time for them to pick up skills like music and languages. We have always had French childcare, which means they are now (age 14 & 12) bilingual, and they've had piano & violin lessons from age 6 (I think earlier would've been even better), which has been brilliant on so many levels and they're now in a music specialist (state) school, so have added drums & singing. It feels like we will have 2 'free' GCSEs as a result, because they will both take French (a year early) and Music, which they should fly through. So then they have more time to focus on their other exams.

We also did a fair bit of sport at that age - easier then, as they have less homework! We took them ice skating a LOT (figure & ice hockey), which meant they took very easily to skiing, which we did as a family for a few years; they can now join in with the school trip.

Hope this helps :)

Oh wow thank you CherryBelle

Your children are very talented :)

Aside from what is available free from the state, your particular financial circumstances and your child (whether there is a specific reason why private would be better), I think of it a bit like cars, you can get the bottom of the range car with no features - it does the job, gets you from a to b, however, that does not mean that you do not want to get the car with the leather seats, dab radio, power steering etc etc.

I think in real terms, it probably is not "worth the £££" - that does not stop you wanting that for your child

"Networking realistically applies to a very few schools, basically the big obvious names like Eton, Westminster, St Paul's. University would be more effective than school for networking!"

My husband went to one of the above schools - he did absolutely zero networking, as did his friend from school days!

It's not deliberate networking, more having contacts through friends without even trying - active networking would not be appropriate!! My school basically made doctors... useless for jobs for your kids type contacts!

I think the “networking” described by randonsabreuse is a bit of myth DH went to one of the three she mentions and has never benefitted from any so called networking. We live in an area with outstanding high achieving school stuffed with the wealthy MCs and with places loads trotting off to RG universities and we choose to pay for 1 for secondary.of you have the financial resources or can get some sort of financial support and your DC gets a place in one of the really top schools like Eton SPS Winchester Westminster and a few other that don’t cost £££s but £££££s then the depth and breadth of education is in a totally different league to that offered in the state sector (I’m not talking about results).

In our specific case it is
The alternative was a failing school in special measures and a teacher I know who worked there told us to do anything to avoid sending DD there as it really wouldn’t suit her. DD might have been ok, I know it’s said that a bright child will do well anywhere but we feel pretty confident that she will achieve more where she is now.
There are a few minor issues with her school but not the same issues that her friends at the failing comp face.

I went to a Private school and I do have a sort of network, but it’s more about cheap holidays in nice places than a businesses thing.

Will a “bright child do well anywhere”? This is a genuine question? Our nearest large town has a school which is truely shocking results the worst performing school in the borough bottom 10% nationally terrible progress 8 score. I listened to a talk by the head she was was honest enough to admitted that many pupils make no progress some mainly those from disadvantaged backgrounds actually go backwards. A colleague sent her DC there, they are an interested involved MC family her DC left with mainly Cs at GCSE but you can’t help but wonder what would she have achieved at a high performing school like those where I live (different borough). There’s a big difference for A level options and maybe future universities if you have mainly Cs or mainly As and Bs at GCSE.

Will a “bright child do well anywhere”? This is a genuine question

I don’t believe that they will. I need to have the assurance that they’re teaching to a level 9. That’s not to say that I expect my children to get 9’s, I suspect they’re 7/8 children but I want them to be able to aspire to a 9. If the school only teaches to a 5/6 because all they are interested in is getting the children to pass them how can a child’s do well anywhere. To teach to a 9 you need to have a decent cohort of children who are able to work to that level. At a very comfortable 7/8 my eldest is only in the bottom half of the top sets. Even the bottom sets would expect to get a good number of 6’s and only children with significant SEN would not achieve the magical 5 passes.

If it's the right fit for the child then it's money well spent.
A good private school is better than a poor state school. There are some state schools that are better than private.
I think it depends on the child and the school if they reach their potential or not.
I have 2 that didn't fully reach their potential, at state schools, one of them working exceptionally hard, and the other is bright but lazy when it came to homework and revising.
The third will reach her potential because she is that personality, her school is private, but I believe it's the fit that counts.

I think if a bright child has parents who can afford to even consider private schooling then they can afford to buy a property in the catchment for a school that gets good grades. Personally I think buying a nice house in a good area is a better investment than a so so private school. And leaves money for extra curricular stuff for the kids.

I think there is definite networking at many top end private schools. However it’s not obligatory to participate and some DC find it more useful than others! DD is a skilled networker! Not just amongst her own school friends but friends who went to other top schools mentioned above. Contacts made have been useful and they were non existent at our local grammar.

The difference we could see was the development of very confident DC. Exceptional drama builds this. Top class and inspirational speakers also help. Some private schools offer top class contacts for work experiences and really help with university preparation.

I think Music, sport and drama can be significantly better and also the range of clubs and activities taken by dedicated staff. Encouragement to do well and staff they know DC because the schools tend to be smaller and classes are smaller is also an advantage. In the best schools, DC are encouraged to be self reliant. There are often many school trips on offer. Some of what is available at a top private school cannot be replicated at many state schools. They don’t have the resources, the staff or the alumni to provide it.

Depends on the area and whether the school is selective or not. In somewhere like Central Leicester or Central London where the local schools are often outstanding it’s often not worth it as even the selective private schools can sometimes be lower down the league tables in terms of academic results.

However in areas without outstanding schools, even non-selective private schools can often be a better option.

If your only after better exam results then your choice is easier look at local state schools and your local independent schools and then decide which one has the best results and try and send your DC there. Although don’t forget even if your local independent school has better results it doesn’t mean your individual child will do better there than they would in the state sector.

The networking that gets you into politics and unadvertised jobs is done among a small elite group that is a minority even at Eton etc. ie it's not that Eton creates the elite; it just happens to be the school the elite go to.

I went to private schools but my parents didn't pay for most of them. I couldn't pay for similar schools for my kids - well, I could have had one less child, but I didn't, and it would be a long commute for them, and a lot of anxiety - I have health problems so knowing I can give up work again at any time is a huge load off my mind.

On the whole, the main difference is bad news stays out of the papers, followed by many more on-site activities. Some friends with similar age kids go private (live in small towns) and are very envious of the number of school trips my state-primary kids get (it's London, but also places know our school will leap at opportunities so sometimes a museum will call and say 'we've had a cancellation - fancy bringing a class to an exhibition on X in three days time').

My boys have ASD so struggle with many aspects of school, especially sport, art and music - so could say it's handy they aren't forced to do much of it. At my private schools it was always a worry for many kids that if they didn't do adequately academically, they'd be kicked out - not a concern in state.

Local teens have said they don't see the point in grammar schools because the local comps are so large, once you're in sets, it's like having a grammar and sec mod on one site, only with classes and pupils who get to do both.

I figure as long as there is a cohort of bright kids who want to achieve, and a larger proportion from families who take education seriously, state plus parents supporting interests will be OK. Which so far we have - loads of my kids' peers come from families without much education themselves, but will damn well make sure their kids get one (mainly immigrants). If I was in a small town, I might have decided differently.

It depends

• on the child
• on the school
• on the family
• on the area
• on the relative cost

and those factors can vary within families and across time

For me, even if we could have afforded it I'd have stuck with the comp for my kids because the results panned out better than my fee paying school.

For others, you do what works.

Networking also depends on the wider family. My kids will have good networks because DH and I have them. We have them because of people we know through our work, our brothers and sisters and parents have them. I’ll struggle if they want to go into a trade but law, accountancy, finance, TV, journalism we can do.