Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Education

Join the discussion on our Education forum.

Original poster

Slightly loathe to start this thread .. but I honestly want to know with regards to Private Education...

192 replies

Twiglett · 10/05/2007 17:58

I can understand when people say they choose private education for their particular child

But I'm not sure I totally understand how to analyse one's child to see if they would be better in private education

what are the key areas of a child to look at (in your opinion) .. and which ones would be better served in a private rather than a state school (again in your opinion)

I'm not trying to be contentious .. I should just like to know how I should look at my 6 year old who's school life is rather a closed book really

OP posts:
Aloha · 10/05/2007 18:35

That would be LOVELY. My hand has hovered over that thread more than once, believe me!

tbh, I think private education is pretty much a lovely luxury for anyone - what's not to like about small classes? - and the sector is huge and varied, but the idea that you choose it becauase you have a boater festish and don't want your children to mix with black kids/poor kids/kids with special needs, is pretty revolting to me.

Gobbledigook · 10/05/2007 18:39

Honestly Aloha, I don't even like the idea of small classes. It's too, er, insular - is that what I mean? I don't know, it's just too 'small' in general. We are extrovert people, like hustle and bustle, lots of people, lots and lots of friends to choose from.

It's all just too small and neat.
Plus, for us, totally unnecessary.

batters · 10/05/2007 18:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

blackandwhitecat · 10/05/2007 19:31

TBH, I don't like this 'My child is special and could only thrive in private education but state education is perfectly good for the rest of you.' attitude. EVERY child would benefit from smaller class sizes, more individual attention, more extracurricular activities on offer, less disruptive students etc etc which most private schools can offer over state schools. Although I have chosen private education for my dds, I am not pretending that they are special (except to me obviously). I actually believe EVERY child should have what private schools can offer in state schools. I am a teacher in the state system and would hate my kids to go to any of the schools I've taught in. I wouldn't even be happy with the supposedly wonderful 70% A-C state school I went to visit recently because as a C of E school it is terribly selective (taking children from 60 different feeder schools but not necessarily ones that live next door and my kids wouldn't get in anyway since they don't have a religion) and many of the classes are 30+. No matter how bright the child and how gifted the teacher children in a class of 32 are not going to get the attention they need.

Original poster
Twiglett · 10/05/2007 19:34

there are only 24 kids in my child's Yr 1 class and 2 teaching assistants

OP posts:
ThatBeetroot · 10/05/2007 19:36

Twig when they are out of infants it changes.

In ds3 class - before we moved him - there were 37 and one TA.
Now he is in a class of 14.

He was happy at state school though and doing well

blackandwhitecat · 10/05/2007 19:40

Yes, it's secondary I'm talking about although obviously there are some brilliant, well-resourced ones out there.

Gameboy · 10/05/2007 19:44

We opted for independent because:

DS1: VERY bright, bored easily, not challenged or stretched in current state infant; risk of him being distracted by the boys who 'messed around'. His Year 1 teacher admitted last year that he had 'outgrown' the books in the school and gave me a list of books to get from the library. Rather than being stretched personally in class, he was being used to 'buoy up' the struggling children (and also listen to Reception children read! )
Also he has been semi-bullied for being more academic than sporty. He told me that he didn't understand why people got cups and medals for football, but not for literacy. DH & I feel that he would feel more 'at home' in a setting where all achievements across the board are recognised. So he's going to an independent school from Year 3.

DS2: Youngest in year. Shy. Struggling to keep up with kids up to 12 months older than him. Soft & sensitive. Doesn't like all the noise and chaos of 30 in a class. Feel he would feel happier in a smaller, quieter environment with more 1:1 from teacher.

Hulababy · 10/05/2007 20:09

DD is in a class of 14 with a FT tieacher and a FT teaching assistant. This suits her really well. I'd be worried that she'd get lost in a class of 30+. The state school she also got offered a place at had 70 children spread between 2 classes, both classes taught int he same large room, divided by a couple of steps up inmiddle. It just felt too big.

roisin · 10/05/2007 20:10

One of the big things for us (for secondary) has been size not class sizes, but the size of the school.

Ds1 is rather unusual in many ways, and tends to create an impression on a first encounter, which is not always entirely positive. The state schools on the table are much larger (200-210 per year) than the independent (up to 50 per year), and the whole school has more of a community feel. I believe 'the school' would get to know ds1 quicker and accept him, and he would become part of it much sooner than in a large anonymous comp.

I work in our catchment area comp, and I just can't see him fitting in there. The children who are most similar to ds1 are - in the main - not happy.

Dh was desperately unhappy throughout his time at secondary school - bright child at a large state comp where it was not cool to be clever; I adored my time at secondary school - bright, nerdy child with poor social skills at a very small, not particularly academic, independent school with a real community ethos.

fannyannie · 10/05/2007 20:15

For my parents it was quite simple.

I had an obvious talent for music - in particular the organ. My organ teacher lived 25 miles away - and the organ I had access to for practice was 6 miles away - this took up a lot of my 'free' time travelling backwards and forwards to lessons/practice - not to mention a LOT of money for petrol.

when it was time for me to move from Middle to Upper school my parents decided to look at the options - and for me - if I was to have any chance of doing my music and fitting in homework, especially as I approached GSCE's etc the best option was private school.

I ended up at boarding school - as the 2 local private schools which accepted girls didn't offer the Organ as an instrument .

Consequently I managed to do my music, academic work AND have a 'normal' social life something which simply wouldn't have happened had I stayed at home.

My brother didn't have any 'obvious' talents - and infact left school at 16 with only one GSCE. He had no interest in going to private school, and probably wouldn't have got anything from it (something he quite happily admits even now and he's 32) so my parents never considered it for him.

WriggleJiggle · 10/05/2007 20:37

Personally I think a 6 year old is too young to be 'analysed', but I know what you mean. For a 6 year old choose a school with small classes, friendly teachers and good facilities.

When your child is older and you can identify some strengths then select a school based on those strengths, whether private or state.

Blandmum · 10/05/2007 20:46

Aloha, mys ds has dysprxia, and he is in a Privarte school. The wonderful SENCO just sat and chatted with me for 10 minutes at the end of a parents evening, which was superb, since it wasn't a parents evening for ds, but for dd.

The school is small enough, and has small enough classes to help him.

The classes also suit dd who is at the other end of the scale. She doesn't stand out, which is what I want for her.

In the end class size is the key.

ThatBeetroot · 10/05/2007 20:50

not all schools arelike that aloha - my chidlren's school is not!!

Judy1234 · 10/05/2007 21:01

Basically they are all virtually always better off in a private schools whether they have special needs are bright, normal, thick, black, white, sporty, musical whatever, private is always better.

Blandmum · 10/05/2007 21:03

It depends on the school, all private schools are not better than all stste schools

fannyannie · 10/05/2007 21:04

why is 'private always better'??? Some of the senior state schools in our county get better results - and have better music/sports/arts etc facilities than some of the private ones......

aintnomountainhighenough · 10/05/2007 21:29

ooooh these private/state threads are so interesting!! We have chosen to send our DD privately because we think that she is as bright as a button but needs to be pushed and that she needs the discipline they offer (not the only reasons I hasten to add). It may be that she doesn't need these things but frankly you only get once chance at life and I am doing what I feel is best for her. That said and before anyone else says it - we will never really know because we won't be able to compare it to a state education.

glyn · 10/05/2007 21:30

Depends what you mean by "Whose school life is rather a closed book"?

When choosing a school you should look at the results they get, their facilities, the after-school activities and how convenient it is placed to where you live. Some schools are stronger in creative arts for example, or music, or sport, or even academically!! All depends what your child's strengths and weakneses are and how you want to develop their potential.

The biggest advantage of a private school is usually the smaller classes.

My personal opinion having taught in both private and state sectors is that you need to evaluate each school in your area and decide whats suits your child best. To be honest, most people don't have the choice-only 7% of children go to a private school as school fees are too expensive for most families.

Judy1234 · 10/05/2007 21:50

No one unless they're very silly picks a tiny private school started by one teacher in their back bed room type - obviously those are no good but all the proper ones the Manchester Grammars, even the Aldenhams for the less clever children are miles better. There will always be a better private option than a state one.

smoggie · 10/05/2007 22:46

class size was the main deciding factor for us - 12 in reception (independent - nursery class of 24 split in 2 from reception onwards) v 28 (local state).
ds1 in particular we knew would falter in a large class, he is v easily distracted but v inquisitive. We felt a smaller class size would lead to constant stimulation/supervision/encouragement and not the boredom and potential disruptiveness from being in a larger class. Added to this the other decisive factors were extra curricular activities and high levels of discipline.

oops · 10/05/2007 22:52

Message withdrawn

oops · 10/05/2007 22:52

Message withdrawn

smoggie · 10/05/2007 23:05

thanks oops
We're actually a fairly normal bunch of people who just work our arses off to pay for our children's education...there are some pampered yummy mummies, but the majority of us are just like everyone else, trying our hardest to do the best (as we perceive) for our children, stressing about the same things, feeling inadequate about the same things, juggling the same amount of things and generally just trying to be nice and supportive with wach other!
So, tell me - what in that makes you not want to mix with me and my friends?

Loshad · 10/05/2007 23:05

Aloha, one of the things i really like about my childrens' independent school is its fabulous ethnic and religious mix. The better of the state schools within an hour of here are all almost exclusively white and monotheist in culture. The world isn't like that, and so it'sone of the areas where their school really excels over the state schools.