Is 13 too young to think about Oxbridge?

[lottieandmia]

My dd is a brilliant artist and I had thought that she would want to go to art college. But she's also turned out to be very academic and one of her teachers described her to me as 'brilliant' at the last parents evening.

i think that she might possibly be able to try for a place at Oxbridge and she's interested in the idea but I don't know much about the interview process. My best friend went to Magdalen - she said they ask unusual questions. It may be that it doesn't suit her but I thought it would be worth considering.

That was reply to User721 not you OP.

Oh I see - sorry!

No worries.

I went to Oxford and did admissions one year too while doing my GCSE. I would definitely advise anyone against pinning their hopes and expectations on any particular university. If a child loves a particular subject or academics in general that should be the focus, not the accolade of going to a top university.

Once she gets to sixth form she would obviously make her Alevel choices somewhat based on what will be most beneficial for university acceptance and she still wants to think about Oxbridge she would start researching colleges at that point.

As others have said the interviewers just want to select the best candidates they're going to have to teach this person for 3/4 years so they want someone who is up to the course. They do what they can to put particularly nervous candidates at their ease - they want to know your potential.

However the interview process is not perfect. During any admission year to a college with say 8 places in a given subject they will probably have 1-3 candidates they definitely want to accept, quite a few they definitely can't accept (because they think these people just wouldn't cope with the course) and about 10 probably good enough candidates. This will vary college to college - the less popular colleges might not have enough "good enough" candidates and will select rom the pool (i.e the candidates other colleges think are O but don't have space for) and the most prestigious will have filled up all their places with excellent candidates. It's very difficult to choose between the "good enough" students and some of it inevitably comes down to luck (performance on the day is never absolutely predictable and depends on which particular questions you get asked, how you slept the night before etc.).

Remember that everyone who even gets to interview is a straight A student ( at least in the subjects relevant to their degree) and probably has gone through their school career being told they are brilliant.

It's also worth remembering that lots of people get rejected from Oxbridge go to another top university, get a first, then come to Oxbridge for a masters or PhD. Oxbridge rejection should absolutely not be seen as the end of the road. Unfortunately lots of students - particularly those that have "always wanted to go" to Oxford see it as the be all and end all and are absolutely devastated if it doesn't happen for them. Likewise many undergrads get into Oxbridge then fall apart completely in the first term as they go from being top of the class to struggling to get by. It's often the place that students first experience failure and it can be devastating for them.

Sorry that should be PhD not GCSE (I certainly wasn't a child prodigy doing Oxford admissions at 16)!

I would get her to think about what subject she wants to study, not where she wants to go. Sure she can aim high, but if her passion is for the topic, firstly she will be pleased even if she doesn't get oxbridge and second it is better to love learning for learning's sake than for achieving a badge of honour. That isn't to say she shouldn't aim for oxbridge, it just shouldn't be all about the destination.

I think it is great to be thinking about it in the sense a possibility - something that is within the reach of anyone who is very smart and works hard. It's a huge shame when already at a young age children are told that Oxbridge is "not for people like you" or fed urban myths. However it is certainly not good, at any age, to become too focused on it to the exclusion of valuing other options. And I don't think there is much point doing any research as such, as most 13 year olds have very little idea what subject they will want to study or the the environment that will suit them.

I still remember having a chat with the deputy head at the end of Yr 7 (a comprehensive, by the way). He told me how well I was doing and how I would do even better once I started to specialise. I clearly remember him waving his arms about saying "Oxford, Cambridge, the sky's the limit". It definitely planted a seed. It wasn't something I thought about much, but it make me think it was possible. In fact, I did go to Oxford - and indeed am a tutor there now.

I definitely see it as an option for my 13/14 year olds. But it's not something we talk about because it's obvious to them it is an option given their parents' occupations and the schools they go to. If anything I would play it down and make sure they realise there are other good options too! But for children with a different background you may want to do the opposite and play it up.

So it all depends on their parents occupations? If you truly think that then social mobility isn't really a possibility is it. Ditto which school they go to.

Oh I think I understand your post now - what you mean is play it up for children who wouldn't necessarily think about it because they don't have family who went or they don't go to schools who would suggest it?

Just saying my eldest DB tried for Cambridge and was turned down, decades ago - he went to Imperial College in the end which is hardly second string. UMIST, Kings College London, Leeds to name but a few are all just as good as Oxbridge and in some courses better. If she has the head for Oxbridge then go for it, but bear in mind there are so many other wonderful possibilities if she either doesn't get in or chooses not to.

I went to Oxford and wanted to go literally from age 5. I'm glad I went, however if your dd is really into Art, Oxford may not be the best place for her.

I was always pushed and encouraged academically because I was obviously bright, but it took me till I was in my 30s for me to realise that my real passion was creativity and I wanted a job where I could use my creative skills not my brain. So whilst it's good to have a brain that can get her into Oxford, make sure that she follows HER dream, whatever that is, not just going to Oxford because she can get in.

If her passion is art, art college might be a better bet. Or it might not. But only she can know that. Don't assume Oxford is automatically better for her just because it's harder to get into.

If she does want to go, no age is too young to aspire, but I wouldn't make such a big deal of it, because plenty of brilliant people still fail to get into Oxford (luck is involved as well). And if she decides it is for her, you don't want her to be crushed if she applies but doesn't get a place after all.

Oh, and you really don't need all A*s or 9s or whatever to get in! That is a complete myth. Perfection is not required but good grades and outside reading are.

Having looked at more of this thread, I do feel a bit sorry for your dd. Do back off, and your dad, and let her make her own mind up!

It must take all the fun out of it having your mum and grandad nag you about where/what you must study at university aged 13!

Er, nobody's nagging her. But thanks for your insight.

I can't imagine her not being able to use her creativity so I actually think it's quite likely she will go to art college in the end. But she wants to do both.