Dreamer of dreams,born out of my due time, Why should I strive to set the crooked straight. Wm Morris

[indignatio]

Hopefully the link from the other thread will work

My stats

ds is 4.5 - summer born
In reception class

Has issues with:-
Easy distractability (school work and practical tasks)
Concentration problems when not totally engaged by something (95% of the time)
Fidgeting
Getting "lost" in the middle of a complicated sentence/explaination.
Bossy manner
Isolation at school
Poor eye contact
Repetition of sentences until he hears the acknowledgement
No herding instinct

On the positive
Very loving boy
Exceptional reader for his age
Good at maths
Lots of "home" friends
If gripped by something, can concentrate on it for ages

dx:
teacher initially thought he might have dyspraxia - no longer thinks so.
I consider that he has more add traits, but would not go so far as to say he has add.
SENCO to informally assess him next week and then meeting to be arranged with parents, teacher and senco shortly thereafter.

Not sure what else I should put in.

That's lovely about the friends thing Sphil. Always the area that concerns me most too but also great that he's making progress in all areas.

We had our parents evening last night. DS's teacher was in tears that he is leaving her in 3 weeks. I'm not surprised really as he has that effect on most people. He needs 1:1 with literacy - can write well and clearly just doesn't come up with anything to say Do other dreamers have this problem? His reading & maths are excellent though. Year 1 is going to be such a challenge for him though we hear about the statement soon. Am on tenterhooks waiting.

Chocteapot/Kittypickle - I remember you well from old dyspraxia threads! I think I know the village you mean - does it begin with E? If so you won't be far from us at all.

Castles - we have the opposite problem. Loads to say but can't write it down quickly or easily so plumps for simple stuff instead. Good luck with the statement - 1:1 will make a huge difference I'm sure. DS1 gets so much more 1:1 now than he did at his old school and I reckon it's made more difference to him than anything else.

Not that one Sphil, but it's close by, begins with M. She will be at the first school there for a year then move on to middle school which is a few villages along. I just hope that her school is as lovely as it seemed when we saw it, I have friends locally and it does have a very good reputation so I am hopeful everything will be fine. The social thing is the bit that I find hardest about all this, I would have been delighted by what your DS's teacher said.

We still have the whole moving thing to sort, we're going somewhere temporarily which will be a bit of a trek each day, but then will hopefully move down properly close to where the school is. Oh I feel all nervous now thinking about it !

I know the village you mean now but haven't been there. Still not far away from us though! We're in similar position - living temporarily with my parents and doing a 35min car journey into school every day. But from July 19th (fingers crossed) we'll be fifteen minutes walk away. It hasn't been anything like as traumatic as I feared - I was so sad to leave our old home but feel as if we've adapted very quickly. And I LOVE Somerset! It seems to me that there are an extraordinary number of great primary schools (compared to where we used to live anyway).

You don't know how good it is to hear that it's not been too traumatic Sphil, I feel like I'm losing the plot a bit here trying to sort out everything and have viewings on the house. We've been on the market for 2 weeks, had 8 viewings with a second viewing booked for today (I think the agents pushed them into it so not holding my breath !), all I seem to be doing is tidying the house atm and it's driving me nuts. Now on top of all that yesterday DH's mother got admitted back into hospital in Spain where they live, she's had cancer and he's been over 3 times already to say his final goodbyes, poor DH. Things sounded a little better after he spoke to his Dad last night but who knows what's happening, the language problem is a big one. I think we're going to get out of here sooner rather than later then at least we can get on with settling the children in.

Sorry, that turned into a bit of a whinge ! I am looking forward to moving up, I love Dorset and will miss it but we will have so much more support in Somerset as my family are mostly up in Bristol and we've got good friends round where we will be moving, so it's exciting, I just hate the logistics of moving.

Oh yes, all that is horrid. I HATED the constant tidying! We were lucky in that we sold our house relatively quickly and the people who bought it were lovely - no fuss and bother at all. Wish I could say the same about the people we're buying from now...
It does sound as if you've got a lot of extra emotional stuff on your plate too so I'm not surprised you're feeling stressed.

Hello all. Hope all is well - and house moves not proving to tiresome.

Castles, could you please send me the spreadsheet with all 5 on, I am looking forward to seeing it.

May I just have a proud Mummy moment. Ds had his reading age assessed in school yesterday. result 8.8 - fabulous considering he is not yet (but nearly) 5.

Oh well done minindignatio! and sphilmark1! and everyone else, including those whose reports are still pending ...

We've just had the first ever substantially positive parents' evening and report for ds - relative of course, as he's in this specialist school - but the report says things like "made some great peer friendships" and "displays appropriate behaviour most of the time" and that he's been managing not to get drawn into others' disruptiveness, & been living up to his potential by actually Doing His Work. And, with all of his masses of enthusiasm & interest in things, he's been properly contributing in class - not just spouting at people, but making what he wants to say belong as part of a give-&-take discussion.

And he got special praise from the physio for "running the whole way across the playground in one go" -

They all seem to be doing really well atm don't they? Positives everywhere! I wonder whether this thread has an impact - I know it makes me feel less anxious and I'm sure that translates into me handling DS1 better.

Thank you for the email Castles - the spreadsheet makes for very interesting reading. I have also found it comforting as there are certain traits which some ds's have grown out of - which gives me hope.

Agree, everyone is doing well at the moment

We got a statement offer of 15 hours a week for DS in his mainstream school which I thought was pretty amazing but the headteacher said it would not be enough. Really confused now as his teacher previously told me he could probably do with about 1 hour a day Why do I just keep thinking 'targets' ??

Got DS1's Y4 report today and while academically it is all fine (all Level 4s), it is full of stuff about 'increasing maturity' (hoping for it, rather than having it!) and one of his targets is "not to fidget and to make an effort not to be the class comedian".

Honestly, DS1 and DS2 are so different. DS1 skimmed through his report looking for the top-line ("Mm, another well done there, so that's good"), whereas DS2 (5, nearly 6) sat and read his through carefully and then said, "Yes, it is a good report, isn't it?"

Oh God - DS1 wasn't interested in his report at all!
I'm feeling a bit low about it, though I probably shouldn't - he got top marks for effort in every subject, but was marked as 'low' in terms of achievement relative to the rest of the year group for most things. Even reading wasn't as good as I thought - there were four boxes for achievement 'high' to 'low' and reading was only the box above 'low'. The only thing he got high for was RE!!! Don't know how/why! Though he has always had an interest in souls...

Feeling guilty about being a bit depressed by it - comments were all absolutely lovely - but I guess the shameful secret truth of it is that I'd love an academic child . Obviously didn't let him know how I felt - but as I said he wasn't that interested. Smiled when I read his teacher's comments to him and then rushed off to watch Power Rangers.

Do you know, though, DS1, at nearly 9, is appearing much more academic than he was? DS2 is the more obviously 'boffy' one, but I really think (hope!) that DS1 is now growing into his ability and managing to show it somehow. He still has problems with concentration and this appears frequently in his report, but I feel a lot more hopeful than I did in Y2.

His presentation has apparently improved a lot, and he now needs to work on his organisational skills!

I do think they change a huge amount over the years. I well remember boys when I was teaching, at secondary level, who just blossomed at about 14. My own nephew did exactly that - and yet my sister was quite worried about his literacy skills when he was at primary.

I do know all this - I just don't seem to be able to apply the same rational thinking to my own son!

I've just had a depressing conversation with the senco person at DS's school. They are trying to get him a full-time statement so they have to ham it up but it still makes me sad. Know how you feel Sphil but it's always heartening to hear how well older dreamers are getting on.

Is it possible to have auditory processing problems but still be good at speaking?

My sons school have mentioned that he is behind in his work and needs lots of support, he's not at the level they expect in Maths, Reading, written work. He's a summer birthday and about to finish year 1. Reception and early year 1 and he was doing fine.

I've been asked to have his hearing checked as his teacher thinks he's not hearing the instructions. You can ask him to do something and he'll stand there as if you've not said a word! However if you whisper chocolate, he'll come running She thinks he hasn't heard or understood the task and therefore doesn't start. Then needs help, by that time no chance of finishing. It is incredibly frustrating trying to talk to him.

His language aquisition was fantastic as a toddler and pre-schooler. He always seems like a bright inquisitive boy. Asks lots of questions, that lead on from one another. Always has his own ideas, making up his odd inventions. At 3 he could sight read quite a few words without much problem. However all these things are when left to own devices. It must be different listening and understanding in a classroom setting?

Bit of family history: I'm dyslexic but could read before school age, think I managed to fudge lots and lots of context and sight reading. My sequencing, short term memory are crap. Used to get things like 2 out of 10 for spoken spelling and maths tests. Several of my family are dyslexic and my Dad certainly is. Again you talk to them and it doesn't often seem to go in!

My son
Is fidgetty and flappy.
Excitable. Prone to mood swings and frustration.
Sensitive old soul.
Doesn't listen, it seems he can't listen to instructions.
Forgets what he's doing half way through.
Talks over you the whole time, getting more and more excited or frustrated.
Behind in reading and mental arithmatic. Handwriting weak.
Complete day dreamer

Good points
He's sociable
Loves knowing things and very interested in the world and how it works
Good language!
Seems to come up with his own ideas.

May I join in ? I have a dd - aged 6 and three quarters - just finished Year 1.

She is Jekyll and Hyde ! At school she is shy, quiet won't say Boo to a Goose - her teacher said a few things at parents evening that worried me !

She has always been dreamy - but like many of you are saying here - it's like she zones out and either isn't listening or isn't concentrating. In reception her teacher thought it was a hearing issue, but GP said not - and like some of the others she can alwasy hear a whisper of chocolate ! Even in a different room ! She has difficulties with Maths apparently and teacher says she rarely picks up instructions first time and then just sits doing nothing - she won't ask ! Likewise she won't tell anyone except me if she has hurt herself !

At home she is very explosive, argumentative and hates to be asked to stop doing what she is doing, and cries very easily, shouts a lot and throws at least one tantrum every day. These are usually because she doesn't want to stop what she is doing, or can't find her favourite trousers etc. Lately she has started melting down because her room is untidy - but cannot seem to understand that this is beacuse she made it untidy.

On the plus side though - she is very loving and kind, would adore a baby brother or sister, is very very good at reading and writing, writes stories and plays all the time.

Her teacher thinks she is a bit immature and will grow out of this during Year 2. But my friend has two DXed autistic boys and he sees a lot of the characteristics in my dd - albeit not all of them.

I am seriously worried about her - and how we should tackle this. Not even sure a DX would help as she must be borderline I would think - it;s more about stratgeies for coping I think.

Does anyone have any recommendations ? Links books etc ?

Yes, definitely possible to be articulate (in terms of wide vocabulary, understanding of subtle meanings, etc.) but have auditory processing problems - my son is like that.

There are some features of his speech where the processing problems show up, though - ordering his ideas, or laying out a narrative, is not easy for him. For instance at your son's age it was really hard for him to re-tell a familiar fairy tale (unless, say, he had a sequence of pictures to follow, in which case you'd get a wonderful detailed vivid story) - it's the sequencing where there are difficulties, and of course that sense of sequencing is central to taking in and following instructions. There are lots of things people suggest for helping with sequencing - let me know if you want any ideas.

sorry leafturner - leap-frogged you while replying to blueblob. Will think about your dd too!

Thanks Bink

That does sound very much like my son, coming from my family it's hard to know what's normal . Any ideas would be very much welcome!

As a young 3 year old he came in the room whilst I was watching birth stories ( I was pregnant). He asked what the placenta was, how it worked where it was attatched. Then the women got whisked off for a c-section. His diagnosis of the situation was that the placenta must've been too short for the baby to come out . So I've always thought he can take in information, process it and then use what he knows. Even if his conclusions are very wrong Every day conversations with him and it does seem to be more sequencing and ordering rather than physical hearing.

Indeed, we get some very wonderful lateral thinking stuff with ds - it's probably a side-effect of his sequencing not working in an "ordinary" way. We have lots of "eh? - oh yes exactly, never thought of it that way" moments, which are nice.

Eg when he was very little - 4ish maybe - he asked about friction, & dh explained that friction is when something has jagged molecules so that it can't move smoothly over something else: think of trying to push a rubber across a table.

Ds had a think and then said "so does glue have zigzaggy molecules then?"

As a starter idea, board or card games are often recommended - all kinds of sequencing practice there.

Just popped back in as I thought of a few more things about my dd - hope I am not boring you !

She isn't very good at interpreting what she sees. Example - she goes to gym club and is supposed to have been learning a particular move/position - she thinks and shouts - that she is doing it right but her arms are in completely the wrong place. I really don't think she understands the difference !

Similarly she was following a dance lesson DVD - and thought she was doing brilliantly but she really wasn't !

Maybe I'm expecting too much - maybe its me not her !

LeafTurner - have you come across the book "The Out of Synch Child"? One of the things it deals with is "proprioperception" - ie the ability to visualise/feel yourself in space - and difficulties with that. Thinking that you are doing a particular gym move, but actually having your arms in completely the wrong place, is exactly that sort of difficulty.

The book is about children with difficulties which can generally be traced back to their senses working in an unusual way.

Your dd doesn't otherwise sound very much like my dreamer - there seem to be quite a lot of different sorts! - but there is bound to be a helpful person along soon. This thread seems to have a good steady life, so I'm sure you will get some input.

Thanks Bink - sounds good, not on Amazon though - will continue the search !