Taking dd with us on tours of prep schools?

[sweetieaddict]

What's the general consensus regarding this?

I'd like him to see the school, but I feel that an hour of walking from classroom to classroom will bore him. He'll be 4 when we go on the tours.

Would the HM expect us to bring him or leave him at home with granny? Any etiquette tips gratefully received.

Leave him at home. Usually prep schools offer a taster session after registration and before the offer is given (sometimes it forms part of the assessment procedure) - that's been my experience anyway

Whoops - title should read 'ds' not dd.

Thanks phonebox. He'll have to sit assessment if we like them and register, but I'd rather he see the school before assessment day.

Any ideas how to get round that one, if we leave him at home for the tour?

Dd came with us at 2.5 and thoroughly enjoyed her tour .

We returned a couple of months later on our own.

Mm, if he accompanies you on tours, you'll have to weigh up how much you'll be able to concentrate on whatever the staff member is saying, as well as taking in the school atmosphere, as well as keeping DS entertained - that's a huge ask for even the best multi-tasker

Alternatively ask if you can do a tour by yourselves and ask if there's any opportunities for DS to take part in any prospective parents events, e.g. a stay and play session, or an open assembly, or another open day etc. depending on the school...some schools are very happy to accommodate several visits, others less so.

My ex and I are shortlisting, then DS can see the shortlist, but he is 8.

Oh so difficult to decide, if he's an angel or a devil that day, it could swing the decision dependent on his behaviour!

I read on another thread that some HM's make a provisional decision based on parents, not child - is this really true?

DH and I looked first. Discounted the ones we weren't so keen on. Took DSes to the two we were considering.

Most HTs have more contact with individual parents than with their children once they are pupils at the school...it's unethical but I wouldn't be in the least surprised if they did.

I'd ask the school. For example, Channing and SHHS specify that the tours are child free whereas NLCS and Habs actively encourage them to come and have things arranged for them. If these are very selective schools then I wouldn't encourage a preference until you know how many offers you have - you don't want him to set his heart on a school that he doesn't get in to.

Early 4 is still quite young. At later 4 you could probably explain things.
Is this a first school or are you moving him?

If first time school, and you mention "schools" I think I would dash about and check them all first as parents. At a later date I would short-list the options.

It's a first school and highly selective. I've got about 4 I'm interested in, the others I've been put off mainly from reoccurring comments on here!

I think I'll ask the schools what they prefer.

Thanks

I would tentatively agree with the comment re housemasters, but you'd have to be pretty pushy to put them off you

I took DD to the school she is now at and they said they'd be happy for her to sit in on a class while I looked round. She loved it. The only problem came at the end when she clung to the door handle and refused to leave shouting "I don't want to go I love it here can I come back tomorrow". Thankfully they offered her a place and she still loves it probably more than she likes being at home

derektheladyhamster Thu 20-Mar-14 16:33:31
I would tentatively agree with the comment re housemasters, but you'd have to be pretty pushy to put them off you grin.

Thanks for the heads up Derek, I'll have to majorly tone it down then, so he has a chance of getting in!

that's good lists, I don't think they'll do that somehow..never heard of that one around here, but an excellent idea and a good way of them getting a really good idea of your DC's character.