I send my child to private school because....?

[jabed]

Well, I don?t actually, I just work in one. But it seems to be a constant source of questioning on MN and given the current news articles (I have been reading the DM and Tory graph online) about how many of our left wing leaders hypocritically claim to be egalitarian and socialist whilst buying education for their children , or have had education paid for by their own parents. I just wondered, what is it we expect from education, and why is it some of us are willing to pay for whatever that is and how they see that as worthy of their money.

There you go. :)

Haven't ever noticed her on other threads, but ok. The funny thing is, though, if prejudice and bigotry towards children with special needs is a uniquely state school induced trait, how does it come about that it is the anti state posters who seem to be the most sympathetic towards it?

Because they think everyone else is thinking it, but can't do anything about it.

OSN - mis representing (as usual?). I did not say that bigotry was a state school trait. I said that the poster was limited in her ability to express herself which is what had caused the issues in the first place. This limitation of expression (inability to skirt an issue is how I phrased it I think) was I believed a result of her education in a state school.

Hope that clears the matter up.

It is not a oprejudice of parents to want chidlren educated where they can concentrate in class. This is not a private/state school issue. Legions of middle class parents go for teh best comprehensives they can find. They move house. They give their children a long commute. They move from inner London to Bucks. They do all manner of things to do exactly what private parents do. We are all the same. It is a rare state school parent who presumably says - that's the worst school around with the most disruption - let me pick that for my little Jane as it will toughen her up.

It sounds as though the sttae school parents on here are happy and the privates are too so we're lal happy. There's no problem at all. If the state school parents think the fact my children have not been educated amongst the disadvantaged and disruptive and not very clever will damage my children then you can be pleased that your children have something mine do not and if I think mine learn to mix with more different people with much more confidence than state school children nd with huge affinity for all kinds of people, compassion and politeness then I can be pleased too and we can all go away happy with our choices, lucky we do not live in Hon Kong where even as we speak China is proposing to impose a new curriculum extolling mainland china and berating US style demoracy. At least we have some freedom of choice of education here in the uK.

It is never very nice to pick people's posts apart and make things personal. I am sure we all say things that are taken a different way at times. I certainly am and I am sure we all do it at home even if not on line.

To skirt the issue:
v.tr.

1. To lie along or form the edge of; border: the creek that skirts our property.
2. To pass around rather than across or through: changed their course to skirt the storm.
3. To pass close to; miss narrowly: The bullet skirted an artery.

4. To evade, as by circumlocution: skirted the controversial issue.

So this is what people are taught to do at private school.
Well, that explains a lot about what happens at the Palace of Westminster.

You can often hear DC from private schools talking the language of the gutter when there is no one around - the big difference is that they can talk properly when they need to.

Clearly, jabed, your private and snooty education didn't teach you to punctuate properly.

Jabed didn't have a private education- that is precisely why he is so keen on it.

Clearly, jabed, your private and snooty education didn't teach you to punctuate properly

What private and snooty education would that be?

I sent my children to private school because I like blazers and boaters.

Plus poor people smell.

Oh, my mistake. All his talk of the 'circles' he moves in must have fooled me. I can't imagine why those circles would want to include him when he isn't a product of that background.

Thank you exotic fruits

I am a self made man. My success and the circles I move in are a result of my efforts despite my lack of early education, not because of it. Most people in that circle do not realise my background either.

How impressive. How unfortunate too, that you feel unable to acknowledge just how self-made you are to your friends.

Your last post goes a long way to explaining your obsession with RP, jabed.

"My DS can make his own choices when he is an adult. For now it is my role to protect him. I protect him from thieves and robbers and those who might cause him harm in any way as far as I can. If that means making sure he goes to a school or is educated in an environment which is safe from violence and foul language and bullying and obscenity and ill manners, disdain discourteousness and even a lack of work ethos with all manner of disruption, then I will do that for him. That?s what dad's are for. That is what parenting is about."
What you actually said was that you had little life experience of mixing with people different from yourself - which I can all too easily believe - and that you did not believe that such experiences were valuable for your child. unless you believe that all people outside your group disply the unpleasant traits set out in your post quoted above - and perhaps you are just about capable of this, in which case the children you purport to educate have my sympathy - then cant about protecting your child from bad people is entirely irrelevant to the discussion.

I thought this thread would be like an education version of Love is... and instead find it is the usual bunfight. How disappointing.

Speaking as a teacher, with ref to the disruptive and/or SN child, I daresay it has been pointed out already but disruptive children aren't a separate breed or something, they are just anybody's children going through a bad patch. Sometimes they need some sort of punishment etc to learn that their behaviour is unacceptable. Or just support. But the idea that they require permanently segregated education as their condition is permanent and unchangeable is rather terrifying. If this was the case, being a teacher would be rather pointless, if one could not influence children's development at all, just fill their heads with a list of pre-approved and digested facts that Gove et al had decided is what they need to know this year.

Of course all children - even jabed's son and Xenia's dds - have moments when they are not perfect. And of course, like Xenia's dyslexic dd, kids with SN re often noticeably brighter than the 'normal' kids. They certainly don't all pull the averages down!

Skirting the issue isn't something I'd ever associated with Xenia, nor had I ever thought of dissembling as a particularly admirable trait.

Karlos the bit in quotes in your post is funny. All of that happens at private schools too. I assume you are quoting another poster (too lazy to check!). They are in for a rude awakening if they truly believe choosing a private school means their dcs will be immune to all of that. Funniest comment I've read on MN in a while.

"I am a self made man. My success and the circles I move in are a result of my efforts despite my lack of early education, not because of it. Most people in that circle do not realise my background either."

I think they probably do. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news!

breadandbutterfly, I personally would a thousand times rather have my dc - whatvere their ability - taught by a teacher with expereince and ability in dealing with disruptive or difficult children than a teacher whose answer to any problem is exclusion. My ds is currently in a wonderful school where he has thrived in reception with a teacher who is enormously skilled at setting boundaries and securing compliance from dc whose behaviour is a thousand times worse than his - and this in a very traditional prep, I would add, before the usual assumption that such behaviour only presents in a state setting is made. He has benefitted from her skill enormously.

I'm not sure the answer to jabed's rather heavy-handed snobbery is to respond in kind, seeker.

Skirting the issue isn't something I'd ever associated with Xenia, nor had I ever thought of dissembling as a particularly admirable trait

OSN, you are not that naive. You know as I do that often on these threads one has to be careful how one words things, especially when the issue is sensitive.

Xenia often uses a form of reverse psychology to get her point across. I also do something similar in many ways. My style may be different. We both take personal flack without taking offence.

Much offence is given. I mostly ignore it but it doesnt go without my having noted it. I am sure Xenia could say the same.

Have read a bit more of this thread and tracked down the person spouting the stuff Karlos quoted. I have to say Seeker I completely agree with your last post (not often I agree with you!).

It also sounds pretty stupid. He's words on a screen. how can you possibly know?